Do you have any intentions on rectifying the situation you find yourself in OP?

>>21786
She needs everyone to participate in her sickening debauchery so that she doesn't have to feel guilty about it. She'd rather drags us down into the filth with her.

What's next, op?

It dawns on me at some time every evening that I have wasted yet another day. I don't know what I should do to consider a day not wasted, I don't really want to do anything. But at the same time I know I am wasting my life and feel bad 24/7.

That I've never known love. There are others, too, but that is the only one that I really care about.

apathy

My biggest flaw is no doubt my complete, utter lack of ambition. I never had a dream or drive to do or become anything, even as a child. Absolutely nothing motivates me.

I'm also highly antisocial, have very little stress tolerance, etc... much of the usual hikikomori traits. But at the end of the day, none of it really matters when you don't have the motivation to act on anything.

>>21823
I would consider that a good thing, not a flaw. Don't buy into that "tis better to have loved and lost" bullshit.

I have too many flaws to pick just a single one. The only thing that I could really say that would sum it all is that I exist. That would be the only thing that could capture all of my flaws into a single flaw.

I have a couple of friends. One is pretty much like me and I'm his only friend, we've been close-ish for a long time. Unfortunately I mostly just hang out with him for fun, he would never be able to relate to most of my life experiences. The other is charismatic and has a ton of friends. I just get together with him to drink since nobody else will drink with me. Pretty sure he's my friend out of pity. Overall, I can't say I can really relate to either or them to me.

Ive never had an actual friend, acquaintances maybe, like people youd sometimes go with to the cafeteria and generally choose to work with in teamwork asignements but as soon as the course is over I walk away. Im as surprised as you, OP, ive learned that the vast majority of people posting on chans nowadays are fairly normal people. Thinking about it it kinda makes sense, I mean consider the low quality of posting pretty much everywhere, its all either about relationships be it friends or gf, or lack thereof (I think in reality most people are pretending in order to better fit in with the self imposed loner loser stereotype as you can now tell) and interest/hobbies boards are most often full of mediocre posters save obscure and slow places. A true loner either by choice or forced would eventually give up and pursue his other interests, a truly knowledgeable person about any subject wouldn't really care enough about people to blog about it all day with random strangers whether he has a million friends or none. This leaves us with the actual normal people, those not knowleadgeable enough to make worthy contributions to the community and normal enough to have a handful of real friends and relationships with exes all over the place (albeit with issues with said people, as it should be because nothing's perfect and life sucks dick for everyone) flooding the chans as its evident by the average posting content and quality. I say actual normal people because I believe the current consensus of what's normal is way too fucking misguided in my opinion. Normal isn't a dudebro fucking all the chicks who's friends with everyone, that's merely an hyperbole created by the collective (my guess is it's done as a way to better stablish what we should not or don't want to become), normal is a guy with a handful of friends and contacts on his phone, sometimes single sometimes not and with drama filling the voids.

There's also the notion that anonymous communication provides a medium for all sorts of people, normal or not, to talk about things they'd never dare discuss in real life. Can't blame them for that. That's my simple reasoning for why normal people come to chans.

On a related note it amazes me how relatively functional anons families are, the way the media portrays places like this make

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>>21808
I agree with almost everything you said except
>its all either about relationships be it friends or gf, or lack thereof [...] A true loner either by choice or forced would eventually give up and pursue his other interests, a truly knowledgeable person about any subject wouldn't really care enough about people to blog about it all day with random strangers whether he has a million friends or none.
I don't think the relationship aspect is that big (at least on the 4chan boards I visit) that truly knowledgeable people fuck off since they don't necessarily need to be abnormal in the having friends regard (although those without have more time to acquire knowledge) and probably aren't bothered as much (loner maybe). You can always ignore that shit while contemplating the people who post it and still get nice discussions or the information you wanted.
The loner also may still keep posting because it's the easiest way to get immediate responses (the forced one probably more than the other), his other interests can't satisfy his social needs and places like this one probably are too slow to comply when the loner feels the need to communicate (again more likely for the forced one).

>the interest doesn't imply an specific personality and that audience you're thinking of is much, much, much, muuuch smaller than you think it is
I still believe that this place here does imply a specific audience or at least being not normal at all and OP's expectations are justified and fulfilled in my opinion. Sure, we have a few people here who have friends but I think those are in the minority as opposed to bigger chans where normal people are obviously the majority. This thread would back up that notion, if you want to believe the people who have posted so far.

>the way the media portrays places like this makes you think everyone here grew up to be the stereotypal murderer or rapist
You should know that the media is out for the views and clicks so portraying stuff in a complete exaggerated way is how they make money.

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I've had absolutely no friends in the last 5 years. I don't even have a clue how someone like me would go out and make them. IRC humor/bantz doesn't appeal to me, i've lost interest in video games, and i'm not aware of any outdoors enthusiasts that aren't painfully extroverted. I'm stumped.

I agree. The only constant in your life, is you. And even you will change, in time.

>>21726
text makes a sound?

>>21726
Relax.

>>21727
Didn't you originally say "sounds" in the first place?

>>21728
That was my first post in this thread, this being my second.

>>21727
Yes, he has planted a listening device under your desk and the sound of your fingers hitting the keyboard made a retarded impression on him.
I know because

The putting it down on a 2D plane accurately obviously requires some degree of coordination...

On second thought, never mind. I'm not even going to get into this.

Post edited on 24th Dec 2015, 10:13am

try and hit blackbelt in aikido

I enjoy committing crimes. I makes no difference what type, as long as I'm doing something bad and getting away with it I'm happy.

I'm having a little episode where I just can't feel pleased enough to be distracted by much. Ever sine SGDQ ended, I just can't get the same excitement that I got from spamming the chat with the cute emote. I only feel uneasy, upset, and a little nervous.

I guess that the only good thing that I can say is that I've decided to start exercising again. My body feels a bit sore, but I guess that that's a good thing. I've been lifting weights for a long while despite not exercising in close to 2 years, so I'm pretty buff, but not in shape at all. It does help with keeping nasty people away since I am pretty strong and even seem like it.

I still wish I were dead, though. I haven't really had much of a reason to get out of bed besides boredom, and the only thing that I'm looking forward to is the new MH game, I just can't find much reason to keep on going. I'm just tired of mostly everything in the shitty 3D world.

I hate, I detest, I loathe and I abhor writing. There is no greater torture for me than being forced to write text.
Life is not worth writing for.

Apparently my mother had a "mini-stroke" or something yesterday. I was kind of surprised by the news, and came to start thinking about my mother and her dying again. I have no idea what I'd do if that were to happen, and I'd be unable to live anywhere since nobody else gives a single shit about me aside from my mother and my uncle, and my uncle can do absolutely nothing for me.

I don't know what I'm going to do.

Now that I take a bigger look at my life, it only seems to be filled with horrible people and liars. It's been like that before I was born and steadily strong even 25 years after. I try to live my life as honest and as straightforward as possible, however, that doesn't seem to change anything.

There was no way for someone like me to get anywhere in life. I couldn't do much on my own. I was set up before I was even born.

And, are you fucking kidding me? In something like that! I didn't understand at first, even though I knew that it was important, I had no idea the lengths put into something as stupid as that only for me to end up in the same position. What was the point in only judging me by what others had to say? What few actions I had to perform? It's not like anybody knows what I'm really like when nobody spends any time with me. Hell, it wasn't until recently that my mother found out that I am a genuinely decent person, and I've lived with her my entire life.

I really am cursed. Nothing but bad things consistently occur in my life. It's only filled with miss opportunities, failed attempts, broken and/or non-existent dreams, and a broken heart. If past lives are a thing, then what did I do that would earn me this much? Why not just erase me from being reborn or whatever? Why do I even exist? If I'm to be denied everything, then wouldn't the world just be the same without me? Wouldn't it be fine, if not better if I wasn't born? Then, why am I here? Why am I posting these stupid messages that nobody will (hopefully) read or fully understand because of how poorly I express my thoughts (and sometimes go off to do other things in while typing this whiny garbage that just ends up getting garbled up with my forgetful mind)? I'm just a waste of time wasting time.

I think that I might need to either leave or kill myself soon. I don't think that I really have many options in my life, and while I knew that I wasn't going to have a happy ending by any means, I thought that I'd at least be able to do something to maybe prove that I had some value in some way, but that was wishful thinking.

Worst one was my 7th because my friend invited the whole class and they trashed my stuff. Best was my 18th because it was the first time I got drunk which was pretty euphoric.

Best was probably a party I had when I was like 2 or 3, since there were friends. Worst was pretty much every birthday since my 9th birthday, since that's when I started not having friends (aside from usual social group I was forced to be with on a couple occasions until I moved again).

Right now, Birthdays are really just another excuse for me to beg my family to go out to eat.

I only remember of having one birthday party when I was 5 or 6. There are some pictures of it, but I don't really remember anything about it, or of my childhood, it was dull and had nothing really memorable

Later on at adolescence it simple lost it importance, it just was another day who I waked up, looked at the computer time and thought "oh, today's my birthday, cool" and so it is to this day. I don't remember hearing a happy birthday in some good 8 years or more

I don't have a worst birthday, but I didn't really have any parties. The last one was when I was 14 (I'm 32 now, so that was over half my life ago). Three people came, and that was good, but I'm not friends with any of them now.

I do have a sad story for someone else, though. It was a girl who was seven years younger than me, and was diagnosed autistic at the time. She had her 14th birthday party, and no one came. That is really traumatic, especially for a girl. She was very pretty then, too. Now she's almost 25 and looks and acts like a druggie, drunk dumbass. She does have some friends now, though, although they never seem to last long.

I guess that the best one that I had was when I went to Nashville on my own and walked around downtown when I was 26. I went into a museum and saw works by Hans Bellmer, one of my favorite artists. It was pretty nice, although my advisor thought that it was odd that I went on my own.

i know what you mean. it never comes back.

My main complaint about life is that I'm going bald (I'm very vain). I can't truly do anything to fix it, because science just isn't on my level quite yet, but the universe obliterates all evidence of my baldness in the future anyway. I know I can shave it but I'm not quite ready to be a shaved head sex pervert for the rest of my life.

Everything is defined by the preferences of others. Living became something I am able to do thanks to this conclusion, because I do not want to agree with it, therefore I try not to let the preferences of others dictate how I feel, what I do. It's hard not to when I leave the house and perceive other people treat me differently based on my appearance. It's very difficult, but possible, because I know those preferences are caused by mass media (dictating standards of beauty to the public) and mass media should have no real control in the tangible. It does, though (even on my end, obviously), and that's where issues begin but I've written too much for /tc/.

Remember that there is no action, no thought, no wisdom where you are going, and the days of darkness ahead of you are uncountable, as opposed to the days of life. Mulling that over should be enough cause to make the changes you want to.

>>21644

I'm the same. Vain and balding. Just keep it cut short and grow a 5 day shadow/beard. Hit the gym and dress well. The rest will follow.

Here's a song about (not) accepting it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iRC03bp04lU

>>21639
fixing it means you should ultimately become emotionless robot/zombie that shouldn't complain anything a bit about your feelings of struggling your bone hard in this helluva world.

>>21569
Enjoy those few years you have not burning.

Seriously though, the main reason why I'm not killing myself (besides the difficulty of actually going through with it) is because I don't know shit about the afterlife and my life isn't that bad yet that I'd give up cute anime grills for possibly being reincarnated as a fucking fly because of shitty karma or something else.

Nothingness sounds great because your existence is completely wiped and you couldn't regret your suicide, or it wouldn't really matter if you did in the last few seconds of your life because everything is over but there's no guarantee and given what's at stake, no matter how great the chances are (which we don't even know) it doesn't sound reasonable to actually do it, if your life isn't complete shit.
Pascal's Wager has a point despite only arguing for the christian belief.

In the past I thought I were a terrible person.
But then I objectively evaluated other living beings and realized most are much worse and I would actually be seen as nice and altruistic by society.
Therefore do no worry, everyone is shit.

>>21559
>He was a hell of a bad man but didn't went through any suffering in his life

Uhh, ever heard of the Long March pal?

My head is filled with horrible thoughts and violent fantasies. My isolation plan took this into account. I will put an end to this evil bloodline.

I hear "echoes" sometimes. It's pretty annoying because I can't feel alone for a short while but it's probably how my brain copes with the rare situation of having heard a lot of people during the day.

>>21651
I have this when I have been around people a lot, after a long day. When lying in bed, tired, drifting to sleep, I will see in my minds eye visual echoes of the people I've been around during the day, or just echoes of faceless crowds if I've been in a crowded place. And I'll hear their voices, too. I hate it. I can't exercise my imagination or be with my waifu without the people from the day overwriting my thoughts. I have wondered though if this is normal or not. Perhaps I'm ill.

This happens to me, too, except in my case it tends to be random stuff that has subconscious meaning.

yes, i have schizophrenia