/so/ - Ronery
NEET is not a label, it's a way of life!

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20321 No. 20321 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
How do you utilize the internet to fulfill your social needs?

I'd gotten into the habit of browsing a certain imageboard, and while its denizens would describe its fatal flaw as an overabundance of Ford Drivers, I found that its problems were two-fold. Not only had a kind of gravity well of negativity and bitterness developed that sucked you down into it the longer you remained, but the speed and style of posting had become such that trivial, thoughtless posts and interactions were the norm. Browsing the board became rather like eating potato chips for dinner: it was easier and more immediately-rewarding than cooking, but ultimately dissatisfying and a bad habit to have established.

Now I feel like I hardly know how to have more meaningful, personal interactions with others. I've gotten so used to not just anonymity, which can in fact facilitate such interactions, but to a sort of uninvested, careless slinging of comments. Worst of all is the lingering doubt that perhaps this is just me and that blaming the imageboard is only an excuse for retreating from social interaction. That thought has lurked in the back of my mind for some time now, and yet I've done nothing about it because I've always felt that there simply wasn't the right venue, or the right crowd of people therein, to make that change.

Apologies if this post is a bit bloggy; I hope it's at least relatable.
9 posts and 1 image omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 20353 [Edit]
I make very stupid mistakes. At rare occasions, I connect and get along with a person over a period of time and when we have a chance to move our conversations to the next level I cut contact with them entirely and never attempt to reconnect. This is how I find myself perpetually alone. When I am forced to remember, there is bitter pain of regret as I imagine what could have been and how I hurt the person's feelings by my actions.

I've done this a lot and it has left me emotionally drained. I don't ever want to go through that again.
>> No. 20354 [Edit]
>How do you utilize the internet to fulfill your social needs?
I don't, I wouldn't even know how. Image-boards don't count since I only barely use tohnochan.
>> No. 20372 [Edit]
>>20353
That doesn't sound like a mistake at all, that sounds like deliberate self-sabotage born of a fear of intimacy. I hope some day you're able to overcome it.
>> No. 20381 [Edit]
I have a twitter where I interact with people on a mostly superficial level. I am quite social on the site though. I'm your typical introvert, but online it's like I'm around friends so I feel free to talk about things and give my opinion even if I don't know the person very well.
I also have a small group of friends I play games with. Been together for near 10 years now. We sit on a teamspeak server to chat and play games.

Those 2 things + imageboard make me feel accepted enough to fulfill any social wants or needs. I used to think I didn't need any socialization but I've come to realize I'm still as addicted as anyone else.

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19386 No. 19386 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
What do you believe caused you to live a solitary lifestyle? Do you believe you turned out this way because of the environment you grew up in? Shitty parents? Difficulty with fitting in with other kids in school and never getting the chance to be social? People in general being shit?

Or do you believe you live like this because you chose to and that's the way you are?
35 posts and 2 images omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 20241 [Edit]
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20241
I have pretty severe OCD and anxiety. It persisted through school, and it was absolute hell on earth. I finally dropped out and became a shut-in. Pretty self explanatory I guess. I didn't really have many options, I was losing my fucking mind. Now the time's just passing me by. I get major panic attacks going anywhere public at this point. I'm pretty much a basket case.
>> No. 20254 [Edit]
The world is a shitty place filled with shitty people. I hate interacting with others (in person) . I don't even much like mutiplayer games and chatting with people online can be really annoying more often than not.
I view the outside world as a wasteland filled with parasites. Every time I step outside I feel like I'm at rest of getting mugged, arrested, assaulted, harassed, raped, or who knows what.
I'm a very cynical person and believe that every single person walking the streets out there is just waiting for their chance to fuck you over.

yeah I picked this way of life and I can't imagine living any other way.
>> No. 20275 [Edit]
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20275
I had a good child hood, but when I entered middle school I had trouble making friends. The only 2 people who liked me was this Ukrainian who barely spoke english and this girl who was really into hentai and 4chan(we were like 13 at the time). She left half way through the year and the Ukrainian kid got on my nerves a lot. It got so bad I asked to leave and go to public school because I thought it would be more laid back, but I only lasted a day. It was hell. Then I got put through home schooling at my grand parents house because my mom and dad were fighting all the time and eventually split. The homeschool program wasn't monitored, so I completed the first year and gave up. I was in the 9th grade until I officially dropped out at 18. I still had one friend at the time, but he only came over to play Elder Scrolls and ignore me. Then like 3 people in my family died and I had to move. I was already a hikki at this point, but I lost the one guy who came over to game with me. I've been alone ever since, and I don't feel like I'm ever going to recover. I really don't care anymore, I just want to take it easy on my own.

I'm not hikki anymore though. I used to be terrified to go outside for reasons others have stated, but my family bought me a car out of desperation that I would get a job, and driving around helping get over my fear of being in public. Living in a city actuality helps some. I feel like I'm just one in a crowd of many, which makes it feel like nobody is leering at me or anything.

So I guess all in all I'm alone by chance, but my mom wants to take me to a doctor because she thinks I have asperger's.
>> No. 20332 [Edit]
I have a really hard time with boundary stuff. I keep most people at a big distance because I am too mutable emotionally. That and I can stand when a friendship or whatever is entirely charity. I've never met someone that's even a fraction of the conversationalist an imageboard is. It doesn't feel like pissing down a storm drain to be an internet recluse whilst having to manually unplug every single person in your life from the culture botnet just for them to be able to hold the drool in is so daunting I'd rather eschew it entirely.

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20175 No. 20175 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
I'd rather procrastinate myself to ruin than work on my assignment. Even if procrastinating causes me to fail classes, lose thousands of dollars and destroy my career. I read all the articles and advice on procrastination already. They keep telling me to do things like split up a large task into smaller ones but I'm too lazy to even do that.
17 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 20287 [Edit]
What are you afraid of OP?
Ive procrastinated until ive failed 4 semesters in a row and lost a lot of money but it helped dispel the illusions of life.
It is a game and you must treat it as such if you want to enjoy yourself.
>> No. 20290 [Edit]
>>20287
The fox and the grapes.
>> No. 20291 [Edit]
>>20287
>it helped dispel the illusions of life
Such as?
>> No. 20934 [Edit]
Same here. I'd really rather stare at a blank wall 24/7 than do even a minimal amount of work.

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No. 20249 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
Hey guys, do you accept refugees? I used to use wizchan, but that place has gone down the gutter. I don't think I'll ever go back there. I understand if you'd like me to go somewhere else, because I hated when r9kers came to wizchan.
7 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 20261 [Edit]
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20261
>>20259
bitch nigger
>> No. 20262 [Edit]
>>20260

Then you could, you know, read the rules. You'll even find out that what you did is not-so-welcome here (pysche!). We don't really mind 'outsiders' per se, though. Everybody was new at some point in time.
>> No. 20272 [Edit]
>>20270
The thumbnail made that look like some weird horse faced girl.
>> No. 20284 [Edit]
>>20272
I thought it was a fish face, myself.

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20056 No. 20056 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
Ever feel that life gets really boring and repetitive doing shit alone in your room day in and day out?
8 posts and 1 image omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 20103 [Edit]
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20103
There are plenty of things for me to do in my room. So whenever I feel like that, it's my fault, not the room. I could draw or try to make music or something, but there are times when I just lay there doing nothing but worrying and feeling sorry for myself instead.

If I tried going outside, I feel like it'd be tons worse and I'd have 0 idea what to do with myself 100% of the time. No point in worrying about outside when I don't have it together inside.
>> No. 20137 [Edit]
When I first became a NEET, yes. I made the mistake of putting all my time into one specific hobby until I got sick of it. Now I cycle through many different things in a way so that I am never bored and never get sick of them.
>> No. 20208 [Edit]
Every day is a new and exciting adventure when you read.
>> No. 20253 [Edit]
Beats doing shit with other people.

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20195 No. 20195 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
Do you have any event/thing that since has happened its completely dictates/changed your life?
3 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 20199 [Edit]
>>20198
So what happens when the doc says you have teh autism?
>> No. 20200 [Edit]
>>20199

Well this was back in 2000, and my parents were basically looking for any excuse to control me, but you are pretty much doped up on meds and treated and kept at the level of a retarded toddler, even if you were in advanced classes in high school and have an IQ that is well above average.

Anyone who says that autistic people aren't given medications as a defense to what I just said doesn't know what the hell they are talking about. Many, many psychiatrists who specialize in autism are basically quacks who dope their patients up as guinea pigs because they are given a cut by the pharmaceutical companies, or at least were at one time. Some autistic people are on as much as 20 different meds.

The kicker, though, was that I wasn't fucking autistic, and it was obvious. It took me almost a decade to get away from that, and for the longest time my father tried to put it back on me as a means of control. He failed, but he still managed to ruin my life. I wouldn't have been around him if my mother wasn't dying of ovarian cancer.

I have some form of psychosis now. That does run in the family, but a part of me wonders if I became that way due to severe abuse. I think that my mother was smart enough to know that I did have that, but wanted to "hide" it with the autism label; my father, on the other hand, is simply too stupid to know what either autism or psychosis really is, despite being a general surgeon.
>> No. 20214 [Edit]
>>20195
When I started playing World of Warcraft all the way back when it first started with open beta was probably a big turning point for me. I was already well under way on the road to addiction before that, but WoW was the last drop needed for me to shut myself in and completely ignore the outside world for a couple of years, and all that I am today was probably bred during these years.
>> No. 20225 [Edit]
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20225
>>20195
A string of hospitalizations, first in a mental hospital. On the same day I was thrown in there, I was anally probed and diagnosed with a chronic illness, which got me hospitalized for 2 months some time after I'd been released from the nuthouse.

Following that, I wound up with several surgeries involving a physical deformity (stoma; googling 3D images not recommended) for around two years.

It wasn't very fun. I maintained a 10-20% attendance record in education, which was allowed because of physical illness.

My condition eventually improved, but after getting a taste of the NEET life there was no other way. It's been 7 years since I first got hospitalized - 3 of them fully NEET, though even prior to dropping out I was not getting educated in the slightest.

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20141 No. 20141 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
Do you guys get angry or depressed when thinking about sex? I normally do, especially when continuously exposed to pornographic material of any sort or sometimes when going out. The inexistent propects of sexual life for my are quite saddening. Does anyone else feel the same?
7 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 20165 [Edit]
I haven't cared about sex in a long time. My thoughts are too preoccupied finding possible solutions to my current predicament, aside from suicide.
>> No. 20166 [Edit]
Yea. It's usually fine in a doujin/2d though
>> No. 20167 [Edit]
I still watch porn and read doujins/VNs but i have no need to have sex as the fact i can't masturbating since nothing comes out
>> No. 20223 [Edit]
Yes it causes me a lot of frustration. I don't understand how anyone can just have sex.

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19995 No. 19995 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
I had to leave the house and use public transportation today. I shouldn't have left the house.

So I'm standing on the train station and I see women everywhere. What really caught my eye was these 5 ethnic women with tight white jeans and large butts standing on the platform and waiting for the train. I looked at them once, but quickly looked away and never looked at them again. I didn't want them to think that I was interested in their looks or anything. But deep down I was full of anger, rage and mostly jealousy. I knew someone was hitting that, and it wasn't me.

I enter the train and take a seat. Next thing you know a group of slim white blonde women (17-18 years of age) enter the train and they sit near me. I have social anxiety so as soon as they sat near me my heart started to beat really fast and I felt very nervous and shy (is there any cure for social anxiety?).

I hear how they talk about having a "women night out" (whatever that means) and they are deciding where to go. Five minutes later one of the women spots a group of guys on the train and they all agree to go and talk to the guys. But before they did that they took out their combs and make-up and fixed themselves and then approached the group of random guys.

I really felt like shit at this point. I felt like an complete loser. A fucking failure. I chewed on my gum as hard as I could but soon realized that it wouldn't change anything and that I was just coping by chewing hard.

I switch train and this time when I enter I see 2 women with a speaker blasting high volume music and singing along. Pitbull, Jennifer Lopez etc. I quickly realized that these women must have received huge amounts of validation because no normal person would be this courageous to actually play shitty music loud on the train so everyone can hear it. The stuff that they sang made me so fucking angry!

"Life is great", "We love to live and party", "We want to have some fun", "I want to scream and shout and let it all out"

Fuck!
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13 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 20206 [Edit]
>>20203
>>20205
yeah just be urself
>> No. 20207 [Edit]
>>20205
What if doing what you like lands you in a tough spot because you never worked or saved any money up and you're forced to go on your own, or something?
>> No. 20210 [Edit]
>>20205
This post is pretty fitting for OP's pic.
>> No. 20219 [Edit]
>>20205
>>20206
Sry for late reply.

Cant say i hate it nor that i like it, but im tired of this life, just tired of it.
Tought i hadnt really done anyhthing particularly good that day.

Im not getting younger and the fact that i just sit on my ass in the house rather than doing something outside just reminds me of another wasted oppertuniti to grab a slice of life and take a chance.

On the other hand id only be tired and get a sunburn.

Anyway thanks for listening to my whining, i appreciate the attention.

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20148 No. 20148 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
THE PATH OF LIFE
* The lack of knowledge has extreme consequences. That's the reason why experiences are so important in life.

* There are multiple sides to every situation, just as there's two sides (and an edge) to every coin. If you know only one side of a matter, you are almost sure to fail in your judgment. *Truth* is a verb, not a noun. And to catch it you must be fleet of mind and willing to see matters from a constantly changing viewpoint.

*You need to balance all alternatives: good, evil and neutrality. Your good is another creatures evil and your evil is another creatures good. Nothing has a monopoly on Truth.

You have to be tested to earn the great reward. Failure is for the weak and cannot be forgiven. One thing is for certain and that is:
LIFE CONTINUES

4 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 20189 [Edit]
There is only one universal good. Strength. There is only one universal evil. Weakness. Changing environments often change what it means to be strong or weak, but these are the traits that determine what will be around tomorrow. Don't believe me? If there is any higher power, this is the morality he enforces upon the universe. Any other morality you attempt to hold true can only be enforced through the morality of strength. And if you don't like that, the only thing you can do about it is become strong enough to change it.
>> No. 20190 [Edit]
>>20189
I for one believe Strength is evil and Weakness is good. Strength leads to taking advantage of others, bulling, abuse, and apathy for others.
Weakness teaches humility and humbleness, and makes people sympathetic to the plights of others.
Nothing but pain comes from Strength, but in Weakness you'll find great potential for kindness.
>> No. 20191 [Edit]
>>20190
>in Weakness you'll find great potential for kindness.
Not >>20189, but on this board we find plenty of weakness and not much kindness, at least in my eyes. I suppose one could say that strength just gets things done and gets direct results...
>> No. 20192 [Edit]
>>20190
That kindness is evil. Sadism and altruism are equally bad. Both lead to your spirit being crushed, the difference is that the sadists break your spirit by crushing it, the altruists let your spirit whimper away into nothing. Any exploitation, bullying, abuse, or anything like this directed towards you is just another chance to struggle towards your own self-determination. Just because you're strong doesn't mean you have to crush those under you. Strength can be the means to defend the weak and commit your own evil in this accord, if that's what you think is so right. Just remember whenever you go around helping people out of the goodness of your heart instead of when they really need it you're really just patting yourself on the back and denying them an opportunity to grow.

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20183 No. 20183 hide watch quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
Does anyone else here find himself makign stupid errors despite totally knowing better than doing them? Like doing things impulsively on a whim or not doing certain things despite being aware that you should do them or simply not paying enough attention to the moment and then forgot to do things. Not out of lazyness but just out of lack of carefulness.

For example i tend to take too much to drink, despite knowing i could just add more later.

And also is there a easy way to train yourself of acting in a more concious manner, i think most things i do i not really think about properly before doing, despite or even because i know i should do better.
>> No. 20184 [Edit]
I eat when im not hungry. Just weird compulsive eating. I know i shouldn't but i know it doesn't really matter anyway.
>> No. 20185 [Edit]
>>20183
>a easy way to train yourself of acting in a more concious manner
sounds like you're talking about Mindfulness

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No. 20018 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
It's hard to get a job without the advantages of nepotism and high social skills. Without education or work history. In the first place filling out an application is difficult. Each one takes 30-60 minutes to complete and many must be completed. It's hard to get ANY job, even the jobs that people say will hire anyone, that are easy to get. I saw a posting for a minimum wage job shoveling shit. Literally shoveling shit. The ad required applicants to be a certified sanitation worker and at least 2 years of related experience, in order to be qualified to shovel shit. I have to lie about everything to get a job. Fake references and work experience hoping that they won't verify it. I have to lie at the interview. Research common questions and acceptable answers, make up stories about things that happened while I was working in the past, adopt a normal persona as much as possible for those 20 minutes and tell them what they want to hear. The process is grueling.

After a lot of time and effort, and with a lot of luck I am finally able to get a low paying part time job. Every day when I wake up to my alarm I weigh the pros and cons of going to work while feeling very tired. More tired every day. Within the first few weeks, I always call in sick. I do it a few times, actually. Then I get fired for abusing sick time. That happened to me twice before I learned that I can absolutely never call in sick or I will be fired. I decided that if I am sick I will go to work anyway and leave the decision of whether I'm well enough to work to my employer. A while later I got a job as a cashier in a supermarket. I had been very reclusive for months previously so I was very anxious, but could function at a level capable of customer - cashier interaction. I actually wrote a flow chart on an index card and kept it in my pocket to practice. Hi, how are you, fine and you, fine thanks, etc. My coworkers were all teenage succubi and they seemed upset when I didn't gossip with them about our other coworkers. Several times I was sent outside as a replacement for the cart jockey. I enjoyed that a lot more. The workplace gradually became hostile, after two weeks I had a panic attack and left in the middle of my shift. After that I was fired.
1 post omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 20030 [Edit]
To handle social people you just politely agree with them until they stop bothering you. For the lack of ability you just have to practice and get better I guess.
>> No. 20158 [Edit]
>>20019
Seems those places trusted they could hire you. The last one seemed to be giving you chances, how do you mess up mopping?
>> No. 20160 [Edit]
Applications are piss easy to do. It's always the same shit honestly. If you have an auto fill on your browser you can hammer out an app in maybe ten minutes. Nobody calls references anymore, it's a huge rarity. Plus since we're coming off of a recession where countless businesses have died, faking previous employment is easy as shit, just put down that you worked at that hardware store down the street that closed in 2011, or that fish pier that burned down a few years back, at least until you get enough good real employment for your record.

What pisses me off is two things: online applications, and interviews.

Online applications basically filter apps for incredibly lazy HR reps. Gone are the days of calling a place and asking if they looked at your application. Everyone in my family says "oh just call them" when half the time there isn't even a number, the other half they get annoyed with you for calling at all. Whenever a place offers paper applications I GO FOR IT because it increases the chances they will actually be arsed to look at the fucking thing since they can't just F9 the stack.

Interviews require some sort of social ability. I came up with a persona to get through this, but it's still incredibly difficult. Why does one need to be able to conduct some sort of social bullshit to become a dishwasher or cookie packer or some shit anyway?

As for me, I'm stuck in a freeter cycle with a seasonal business, a local amusement park. They don't have to offer benefits for full time work since they are seasonal, and every year after the season ends I look for a job, but always have issues trying to get a job, and once that email rolls in around March I pretty much have no choice but to go back to them for another summer of dealing with shitty brat teenagers and running ageing amusement rides for just over $8/hr.

Also, tips: people with the qualifications that job listings "require" will almost never apply for those jobs. That trend is a holdover from the recession. Now that employment is higher, employers are used to selling the position high because they were inundated with applications and had to limit the pool. Requiring sanitation cert for janitorial jobs or x years retail experience for a stocking job were done because there we
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>> No. 20161 [Edit]
I got a job recently after being a NEET for the past four or five years. About a year ago I got one but I quit after my first day there for various reasons, now I'm on 40 hours a week.
I put out a dozen applications when I halfheartedly decided to get back to working, all but one got ignored, the one that didn't get ignored had me take an hour drive to an interview that I never heard back from. I think my problem was I was being way too honest, and I think that long gap of not working was really making things hard on me. So I applied to a place I found online giving fake info about being a high school grad, about how I've been working up till recently, and how I left my previous jobs instead of being fired. Job asked for some training certificates but that wasn't a problem, I was able to easily hack the site they referred me to and get the answers to all the questions and complete the 'training' in no time.
Now I sit in a small room being paid $9.50 an hour to play games and watch movies on my laptop, and occasionally walk around when I feel like it. Most of the time there isn't another soul in sight. Honestly I couldn't have asked for a better job.
Seriously, look into security guard work. It can be ideal for NEETs and hikki.

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