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23024 No. 23024 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit] [First 100 posts] [Last 50 posts]
Last one is on bump limit.
Post Cute Anime Girls Every Time you Think About Killing Yourself v2
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>> No. 24352 [Edit]
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My monitor is running warm and I can feel it when I sit too close.
I was browsing pictures and when this one came up the heat made me feel like she was really close for a second.
Even got a slight tingly sensation in my cheek, almost as if it was about to be gently scratched.
I'm so sad, god damn it. I want to die.
>> No. 24353 [Edit]
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>> No. 24354 [Edit]
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inch by inch
when will you take the hint?
>> No. 24374 [Edit]
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I was moving my monitor and dropped it on a sharp corner. Messed it up real good right in the middle of the screen. Doesn't sound like a big deal, but man, I can't be bothered with this shit any more. The most minor inconveniences make me want to die.

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22527 No. 22527 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
Do you think you might be cursed in some form or another? If so, in what way?
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>> No. 24370 [Edit]
you better calm down, with your hostility youre probably wagiecoping
>i watch anime to fit in whit the kewl kids klub on ntggertits
anime makes me chad confirmed
>> No. 24371 [Edit]
Could you drop the hostility? That's not doing anyone any favors here.
>> No. 24372 [Edit]
Update: I definitely wonder sometimes if I have a mild haunting that makes me unusually unlucky. People always point out to me how things only break or weird things happen when I’m around, or just flat out tell me that I’m unusually unlucky. I’m not sure if it’s karma, or there really is a god that’s punishing me, or if it’s all in my head. I don’t know what to do. I’ve been thinking of turning towards religion, because I lack direction or really anything of substance in my life.
>> No. 24373 [Edit]
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It is hard to explain without going into a lot of cumbersome specific details, but I believe that the world is constantly trying to undermine my happiness in life. I think the motivation is that the powers that be are afraid of my growing magical powers (read: inordinately good fortune). As such, I view a lot of things as a struggle between the world and me. Unlike >>22529, I don't think good fortune and bad fortune necessarily have to reach a balance; one can dominate, but it is an ongoing struggle between the two.
If anyone's interested, I think that detaching my mind from the physical world through appreciation of ideas and artificial constructions fuels my magic, whereas getting bogged down in worldly bullshit weakens me.

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24355 No. 24355 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
Do you people get enough sleep and do you actually dream? If so, can you remember your dreams?

I personally rarely dream. I tried several lucid dreaming strategies, but none of them really showed any effect, even tough I would love to be able to use my dreams as a form of escapism.

I recall my last dream which felt really realistic and touching. I will now just share it here because, even though I dont think that dreams have a deeper meaning (to be honest, I also have not read up on this subject yet), I am interested in your thoughts on it.

I recall cycling on a road near my apartment, moving away from it. It was really late at night, probably around 1 AM or something. I was driving without lights and recall feeling the soft wind of a summer night on my skin, even though it was rather on the cold side. The most interesting detail I recall was the sky: One half of it (the left) was fild to the brimming with stars, way more than you would be able to see in an light-polluted modern city. The right on the other hand, was an empty void without any stars, and the border between these two regions was exactly above my head and had the highest density of stars. It was beautiful.

I am really sorry if this sounds like rambling. Thank you for reading.
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>> No. 24365 [Edit]
Hmm. I think nicotine -- when present during sleep -- actually does something more bizarre than that. You won't notice any marked effect from smoking before bed, only from wearing patches to sleep. I guess because the half life of nicotine is very short. I haven't really looked into it in any detail, but here is something I found:
>> No. 24366 [Edit]
Silene Capensis works great for me, its a root that you consume twice a day that gives you more vivid dreams.
>> No. 24367 [Edit]
thanks for posting 3d
hhahaha that one you hid behind the spoiler was hilarious, who'd have expected someone to post 3d here? whatta card!
>> No. 24369 [Edit]
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I wish I could dream 2D stuff all the time. Anyways, fixed it for you.

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22622 No. 22622 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit] [Last 50 posts]
What keeps you from committing suicide?
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>> No. 24327 [Edit]
For me, hobbies make no difference because I no longer find joy in them. I've considered suicide nearly every single day for about 5 years, but somewhat seriously for about 3.

Right now, everything makes me miserable, so the thought of ending it doesn't scare me that much. I went to the urgent care once for something, and the doctor told me to go to the ER and get checked out because it could be a blood clot. But I decided I'd rather risk death than be in debt a few thousand dollars for the hospital visit, and it sort of surprised me how okay I was with the thought that I could die.

I think that life is a gamble. I know that if I end it, then I end my chance for happiness. The thought that scares me most is that if I gamble on life, and it turns out to be nothing but misery even 20, 30, or 40 years from now, I will really regret having put up with it for so long.

But, I know that it could one day turn out that I could be happy, and if that happened, then I would feel really relieved that I didn't so something so dumb as to end the chance to feel that emotion.

So for now, I do nothing. I continue to exist this way, unable to commit to living or dying, because both options seem to have fair points.
>> No. 24328 [Edit]
Why is your life so miserable fren? What makes you sad? I mean I'm pretty ronery to but I've never been depressed like that.
>> No. 24356 [Edit]
A bit late but I think reincarnation is supposed to be a bad thing, which is kind of the point of the post the other anon is making but I don’t see how suicide would be the solution when it would just make your suffering worse.
>> No. 24357 [Edit]
This was a weird write up, but to be fair many of the sutras have endured centuries of translation and debate. And I don’t think it’s negative or life-denying. Surya Das said this on the matter “Buddha Dharma does not teach that everything is suffering. What Buddhism does say is that life, by its nature, is difficult, flawed, and imperfect. [...] That's the nature of life, and that's the First Noble Truth. From the Buddhist point of view, this is not a judgement of life's joys and sorrows; this is a simple, down-to-earth, matter-of-fact description.”
Make of that what you will.

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23927 No. 23927 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
Enough pessimism! Share some stuff you're happy or thankful for in your life! Or just talk about something good that happened recently!
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>> No. 24313 [Edit]
I enjoy going to the local park and taking long walks. Breathing in the air, seeing all of the green, watching the animals frolic about, things of that sort. It really calms my mind and helps me relax.
>> No. 24349 [Edit]
Same here, its great to take walks
>> No. 24350 [Edit]
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As much as I like winter, it's nice to be able to go for walks, or bike outside. I like biking during the day now that it's getting a bit warmer. Lot of decent hills to go up/down in town also. Walking around outside is best saved for night time, but it is still a bit too cold for that.
>> No. 24351 [Edit]
I really want it to become summer now, but winter already came back three times this year. I read this is the coldest May since 1981 around here.

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24294 No. 24294 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
Do you know what I find annoying? People who complain about being lonely without knowing what it's really like to be alone and take what they have for granted. Maybe they broke up a while back or are just going some time without seeing their friends, these people don't know what it's like to be truly alone. They almost certainly have someone there, siblings or friend or a parent, anything. They have people they can talk to if need be, people who will be there for them. They don't know what it's like to never have anyone.
The internet is my only social outlet, there's no one else in my life I can talk to. I can't even speak properly out loud because of how little practice I get, and it's such a bizarre experience if/when I actually do have a conversation with someone in person. Just being able to talk to someone is one of those rare things for me that normals take for granted. I feel like a ghost in this world, there but disconnected, observing other people as an outsider but unable to join them. I might as well not even be there as far as they've concerned. Even when I make online acquaintances, they never stick around long. I've learned to stop expecting anything from anyone. I still try all the same, to be friendly giving caring, but it never works for long. Their 'real' friends always take priority and win out. I can't even talk to anyone in my family. I have no brothers or sisters or cousins, only an abusive asshole of a father who I don't live with, my simple minded half deaf mother, and my insane uncle. I do still try with them, but it just ends up being a disappointing and frustrating experience each and every time. The real kicker here is that I don't even like being around people anyway. I like being alone and find humans annoying and obnoxious to deal with. I don't know if I'm lonely, or if I've just bought into the idea projected by society that everyone needs someone and not having someone is the worst most lonely thing possible. The times when I'm truly and completely alone without any humans around online or off are some of the most enjoyable moments for me. I feel like I'm just not cut out for intermingling with humans and trying to is a waste of time and effort, but I also find myself worrying in the back of my mind that maybe I've
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>> No. 24343 [Edit]
Yeah I can't talk to other people not because of a superiority complex or anything but because I feel like a fucking alien, people accept working and socializing like it's nothing and I'm completely helpless. Even though loneliness should be easier to alleviate than ever I can't get to the point where conversations feel substantial or where I can just click with people, even as acquaintances. Maybe I'm just shy. When I tell my mom/therapist that I can't talk to people, they say "But you're talking to me right now" but I can't move past baseline interactions. It's like every interaction is about as meaningful and interesting as saying "hi" to a cashier.
>> No. 24346 [Edit]
Yes. People tend to be quite vulgar and simple so I don't like dealing with them. I also have very little in common to talk to them about anyway, even if I do have something in common because of how simple they are they only have a simple understanding of it, I don't gain anything from talking to them.
>> No. 24347 [Edit]
I lived by myself for several years while working graveyard. I think people who say they like being alone don’t understand the psychological impact of having another person in the same house or next room, even if you never speak to them. To feel truly disconnected is literal torture. That’s why we put prisoners in solitary confinement when they display bad behavior.

A pet helps though. That’s why there are cat ladies.
>> No. 24348 [Edit]
I've lived alone for over 3 years now in various places, never have I experienced extreme loneliness due to it.

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23605 No. 23605 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
I think there was a thread for this way back when, but whatever. Quotes that you like or keep you going in life.

“Only optimists commit suicide, optimists who no longer succeed at being optimists. The others, having no reason to live, why would they have any to die?”
-Emil Cioran
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>> No. 24022 [Edit]
Solitude, the true love that never let men down.
>> No. 24319 [Edit]
"It gets easier. Every day it gets a little easier. But you gotta do it every day. That’s the hard part. But it does get easier."

Thank you jogging baboon.
>> No. 24341 [Edit]
"Hell is other people" - Jean Paul Sartre
>> No. 24345 [Edit]
"Between grief and nothingness, I choose grief."

"When the alternative is nothingness, you may as well try."

The first one is from a book called Wild Palms the other is from an album by Amanda Palmer which just came out.

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20141 No. 20141 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
Do you guys get angry or depressed when thinking about sex? I normally do, especially when continuously exposed to pornographic material of any sort or sometimes when going out. The inexistent propects of sexual life for my are quite saddening. Does anyone else feel the same?
34 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 23880 [Edit]
That's actually good. You should feel good about it.
>> No. 24311 [Edit]
Yes, but not in the way you describe. I just don't like the idea of sex and it has always been an uncomfortable topic for me. I remember back in high school a girl shamelessly told me that she wanted to fuck me and I lashed out at her. Just the thought of committing such an act fills me with sadness, anger, or disgust.
On another note though, I can watch hentai or ecchi and not be bothered at all. I suppose I am just a fickle person.

I was actually going to mention this too.
>> No. 24332 [Edit]
My thoughts and feelings about it are more confusing, since I fantasize it almost constantly but they are in the 2D (even when it is with people from the 3D.) There is something quite unattractive about 3D sex for me and it's never been nearly a big concern on my mind that I haven't had it, as it seems to be with other virgins I see. Hentai, audio porn, and most recently erotic literature seem to be so sufficient for me that often I end up thinking that I don't need to worry about being virgin at all as long as I have them. Maybe the lack of intimacy will catch up with more when I get older, but right now I seem to barely care unless it's from feeling social pressure to have it. I only seem to care that I haven't had it because most of my peers already have, but it's something I want to desire myself, not just in order to fill in some sort of functional human checklist.
>> No. 24344 [Edit]
Every fucking time. I'm a virgin and I used to masturbate all the time and even love staring at anime tits for hours, but antidepressants and other events have contributed to immense guilt and a bit of self-hatred when I do masturbate. It feels like I'm vicariously participating in "sex culture" and nothing i can imagine about the act appeals to me

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23463 No. 23463 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit] [Last 50 posts]
Is this the only anime/weeb community left that hasn't been over run by children?
Every time I find a new one to join it's the same thing, retarded teenagers who wont shut up about school or spoiled rich kids and their college crap. It's all "dur hur I'm gonna be a doctor I'm gonna be a laywer" fuck you. I feel so fucking old lately and this shit doesn't help one bit. It's just so ackward being in these servers/channels with kids that are half my age. Not that it's uncommon here either. Where the fuck are all the 30+ weebs? Do they just kill themselves when they hit 30 or do they turn into normal fags and quit the internet? What the fuck man.
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>> No. 24312 [Edit]
The Touhou community is still good. One of the last "weeb" communities that hasn't been overrun by shallow teenagers.
>> No. 24314 [Edit]
It probably depends what community. The Majority of Touhou posters on imageboards are secondaries. I recently did a test where I made a meaningless thread with a Touhou character and then I made a thread about the new game, only I didn't post A Touhou image in the op nor did I mention it was Touhou, I just used the title of the game. The first thread got loads of replies and the second not a single one.
>> No. 24320 [Edit]
It’s probably due to the skill required and how much media there is to get through a lot of it. It’s also a shadow of what it used to be and there’s a lot of discussion over how the games aren’t as great as they used to be. While >>24314 has a valid point, being a secondary isn’t that prevalent compared to how it was in, say, 2012 when it’s cultural relevance peaked. It might also be because of how infamously dumb and passive-aggressive the communities around it were once upon a time that a lot of people don’t even bother with them. I don’t really blame them, even.

It’s kind of funny that people are upset with young people are the majority in a community around the media based overwhelmingly aimed at young people. I’m not even saying there is anything wrong with that, it’s just amusing.
>> No. 24340 [Edit]
>It’s kind of funny that people are upset with young people are the majority in a community around the media based overwhelmingly aimed at young people
When I first got into anime, I remember the community being full of preteens and that never really bothered me. I think the problem a lot of people have is that the mindest of the community has shifted from a bunch of nerds cracking jokes and spamming japanese emoticons, to obnoxious teenagers using "hip" lingo and only having a shallow interest in anime. That's the way I see it at least.
This whole "Nerd culture" thing that has dominated this decade is on it's way out anyways so I'm sure these kinds of people will leave this community when something trendier comes along.

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22193 No. 22193 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
what is your disability?
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>> No. 23989 [Edit]
Sleep apnea.

I have several mental illnesses, but I believe I would have developed the ability to cope with them had I not been hit by sleep apnea.
>> No. 23992 [Edit]
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impulsive, low iq, weak,

i am not sure how it became like that. but that's how it is. pic related sums up my life
>> No. 24333 [Edit]
High functioning autism. Got diagnosed not once, but twice. Once when I was about 3 or 4, and again when I was 18 or so. Same place too. Nova Southeastern University in Fort Lauderdale Florida.
>> No. 24339 [Edit]
my knee is at risk of being dislocated constantly.
i have delayed sleep phase disorder and my sleep schedule is constantly fucked, it's probably the most distressing thing i have and probably the biggest reason I am a hikki, i feel like society is closed off to me
i also have a handful of mental issues but i am sure the users of this site are tired of hearing about that.

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23278 No. 23278 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
Are you happy with your life?
36 posts and 4 images omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 24120 [Edit]
You know, I'm not really sure. On one hand there's days like today where I'm loving life but for every day like today it feels like there's three others where I'm either moping around or in an outright downer mood. I'm certainly less prone to destructive thinking than I was in the past but now it's different. I used to think I could fix all these things about myself but I don't think that anymore. I feel sluggish and defeated. But even then there's a certain freedom afforded by realizing that certain things I've struggled so hard with just can't be fixed. I think I'm becoming okay with that. If they really can't be fixed then it's something I'll be able to forgive myself for. After all if it'd take me a lifetime of work to sort out wouldn't I be better off cultivating good in some other area?

I'm a mess. Thanks for reading my blog.
>> No. 24310 [Edit]
Not at the moment no. It's nothing wrong with me per say, it's just that I hate our current society. We have reached a point in our society where talking like an illiterate dumbass is cool, and where your social status/worth is judged by how much you buy and what kind of clothes you wear (so basically and endless high school *shivers*). The internet used to be my escape from having to think about this, but nowadays, almost every community I was a part of has been overtaken by normalfags that treat it like social media by posting selfies and speaking in bix nood; and if it's not that, it's ironic fascists whining about politics. Not only is this shit annoying, but it's a constant reminder that our civilization is falling and will probably be replaced by China. The only way I can truly be happy is if I move out in the country, buy a hunting rifle and live off the land. That way, if our civilization falls, I will have nothing to worry about.
>> No. 24317 [Edit]
Nope. It's impossible for me since I haven't even remotely achieved anything I want to. If people define their own happiness, then mine involves achieving things like the independence and job I want. I can't be happy in the moment, unless I know I have accomplished at least one of these important goals. Although I admit, I scrutinize myself like a perfectionist like that, so I probably still wouldn't be...But there's nothing for me to be happy about if I'm still stuck in this jobless, lonely, financially dependent, starting to take twice as long to graduate college than most people, kind of hell.
>> No. 24329 [Edit]
My viewpoint is that life is both meaningless and worthwhile, so yes.

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