>>22304
I'm not even entirely sure how long I sleep for on average. I stay in bed for around 10 hours but at least 3 of those I spend on my laptop and I lay awake for what seems like hours.
Maybe I only sleep 3 hours or something ridiculous like that, it would explain why I feel so shitty.

I am this way too due to delayed sleep phase disorder. If I set several very loud alarms to go off at once I can wake up, but my body is freezing cold and I'll shake like mad, even throw up sometimes. Back in high school I could pull off 5 or 6 as well, it started around 18.

>>22326
Sounds awfully similar to how I am.

When I said I sleep through alarms, it's a bit more complicated. I set multiple at different times; the first one often I hear, physically get up and turn it off then go straight back to bed; the second one I either sleep through without hearing, hear it and leave it ringing until it turns itself off or get up and turn it off and go back to bed, and the third is the same as the second.

I am also always cold when I wake up, even in warm Springs and hot Summers, and that being one of the reasons I don't want to get out of bed. Sometimes I do shake but I am kind of conscious of it, like, I do it to warm up my body.
Never vomited though.

It also started around 18 for me but this is when I became NEET so I've been assuming going to bed at 6a.m. and not being able to psychically wake up was because of the NEET lifestyle.

I get about 8-9 hours of sleep a day. Any less than that and I feel like shit.

Because my body won't let me sleep until I'm dead tired, my sleep schedule is all over the place and generally pretty fucked though.

>>22332
I don't think it should be used as a tool to manipulate others after death (ie: forcing others to feel guilty or incite social change, as you brought up), but other than that, I dislike the fact that it's against the law to harm oneself. I certainly don't advocate that anyone here do it- I'd much rather that you found something to live for, even if it it's selfish or minor- but I still believe every person has the right to end their own life if they feel like it. The imprisonment of people that are already trying to kill themselves into hellish psychiatric wards is a horrible form of torture.

I suppose that it is sometimes appropriate, but most of the time it seems like a waste. The vast majority of suicides are done for pretty stupid reasons, like relationship problems or something materialistic.

Oddly, those who kill themselves due to lack of resources or money tend to off themselves with no problems whatsoever, whereas those who have depression tend to have a life instinct that kicks in right when they are about to die. Just imagine experiencing wanting to live right after you made the decision to die; that is way, way worse than being suicidal, I think.

>>22340
It's a common thought that depression is a mechanism which evolved to impede self destructive action like suicide.

I would speculate that those people who kill themselves easily (like traders jumping off of buildings) are highly motivated individuals and are as far from depression as anyone else.

I've had several bouts of depression recently and tempted suicide but I could never even begin to do it. Like what >>22333 said, there's so much left to do and see it'd be so petty to kill myself just because I feel sad more than I like. Plus I can't imagine the impact it would have on the people around me, I'm no saint but I know people would be greatly affected by my death, especially my family.

Get new hobbies.

Reasoning is, your current hobbies are not making you feel better so there's no reason to continue doing them.

>>22252
What if I dont have any hobbies because the feels are so heavy they impede me from doing anything I enjoy?

Eat or watch cute girls eating cute things in cute ways.

>>22259
Why not just eat a cute girl and cut out the middle man?

>>19510
I can testify to the effectiveness of a regular sleep pattern. When I started sleeping with a consistent pattern, my mood and motivation improved considerably. And when I sometimes have to go sleep deprived, I get depressed and lonely again. So definitely try to get a consistant sleep pattern. Its hard to stick to it at first but the more consecutive days you do it the easier it is to stick to it.

I imagine stuff like diet and exercise might have a similar impact, I never tried it though.

And youre right with the dont beat yourself up thing. Just cause you failed once doesnt mean youre a failure forever and you dont have what it takes. Dont get stuck in that negative mindset. Its not all black and white, its not like successful people will always success and failures will always fail

>>19514
And also I think at the end of the day this site can give all the advice it can but it will msotly just go in one ear and out the other. You realy got to try things yourself in other to learn the lesson we try to teach you.

I haven't quit drinking, but I don't feel quite as shit as I did when I made that post. Thank you for all the advice.
My little sister has been dragging me out of the house.

>>19537
Going outside can be really scary, but it can help.

I used to drink a lot, to the point every morning I'd wake up with puke on my shirt. I started just doing simple things like watering it down.

>>13455
I have depression and generalized anxiety disorder, both pretty bad. Also drug addiction which is a mental health thing I guess. I had a psychiatrist for a while but the therapy was pretty much 'have you tried not thinking like that' so I stopped going. To overcome my anxiety I just don't go anywhere unless I'm drunk or high, and nothing helps the depression besides sleep. I used to sleep 6 hours a night but now I sleep up to 12 hours a day because it makes everything go away. At least I stopped self harming

>>22307
>I'm pretty envious. I wish I could get legal speed. Unfortunately my family is too impoverished for me to seek proper mental health care.
I was actually reflecting on this after it happened. Healthcare is still kind of publicly funded in my country but it has been eroded, so I'm still $100 out of pocket at each appointment and $10 per 100 amphetamine pills. Got me thinking that I might have done this years ago if money was no issue, back when I still had some will to strive.
Now that most drugs which could improve someone's life are controlled, it's almost like they are only obtainable to people who are already well off, rather than those who often need them most. People who can't afford treatment often end up self medicating with alcohol, weed or ice which just fuck their lives up further in a vicious cycle. Same thing with smoking: it's still cheaper to smoke than use nicotine replacement even when cigarettes are taxed sky high. Unhealthy food is cheaper than healthy food. The list goes on, shit's fucked.

>>22309
>People who can't afford treatment often end up self medicating with alcohol...
Oh yeah, I have an irresponsible observation relating to this: I have found since starting amphetamine it is a lot easier to reach a lovely level of drunkenness without the normal sedation and shitty feeling. No doubt because this is so enjoyable it's harmful in some way, maybe there is synergistic neurotoxicity or some other awfulness. Because you know, experience shows there can't be happiness in life without suffering down the line to outweigh it tenfold.

I turned 18 not long ago and I realized I have actual mental retardation. Not imageboard autism, I mean really retarded. Someone who starts sperging, having seizures or epilepsy out of the blue, say things you didn't want or mean to, display weird facial expressions for no reason, start laughing by yourself sometimes even in public for no reason, have absolutely no sense of balance or any motor coordination, inability to connect with others in any way, not even on imageboards, have not at least marginally normal emotional reactions, strongly react to sounds and touching, constantly live in a world of delusions and mirages created by your own mind, feel like you're constantly tripping on psychedelic mushrooms, have your inner brain constantly work in very weird, broken ways. I could go on. Basically think of an ugly drooling retard. That's me. After I finished highschool I have been a NEET since November and was indulging upon my life. The last straw that only confirmed my thesis was finding out I used to take medicine for the retarded since a young age. This is not something I wish for anyone no matter how evil they might be. To live in a constant state of uncertainty, knowing that because of some condition outside your reach, everything you see, hear, smell, taste, touch, everything you experience, that you think, feel, perceive, thats all invalid, worthless, meaningless, devoid of any certainty. That is to be retarded. You're constantly a bother to others for simply being alive. You break any object you touch, you hurt people you don't even know, you're unwelcome in any place even on these imageboards. You constantly live in a world of pain, suffering, despair, set up by your own brain, something that cannot be removed, almost as if a paranoia or schizophrenia. There's no way to tell anything you do or say (read as "type", since I don't talk at all), is any good. In fact, I take it as a rule that anything I do is bad, since I'm inherently a bad person. Right now with this post I'm shitting up a potentially great thread on a great imageboard. There's one thing I'm thankful for being born like this and that is the insights and intelligence. I can easily imagine and see wonderful, beautiful, amazing things. Not in the artistic or philanthropic sense. But in the sense of mathematics, enginee

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>>22278
It shouldn't discourage you or him, but it's not all fun and games with money raining from the sky like those old threads pretended. (Descartes anyone?)
Either way, there's no harm in trying. Good luck!

>>22278
Best of luck to you both. It might not be easy to try and go on SSI or disability, but it could be worth a shot. Believe me, if I knew that I could easily do it, I would. I've got fucked up feet, which limits the amount of standing I can do, and likely have some form of depression/anxiety/autism or something, but since nothing was really diagnosed in my childhood aside from my feet, I would personally probably not be able to get it.

The people who can judge or diagnose you are pretty good at spotting fakers. Couldn't hurt to try though.

So this person doesn't even want to talk to you (your own words) and you think you're friends? Maybe he is depressed because after a long day of work that last thing he wants to do deal with your bullshit. Full time is draining no matter what job it is. He works at a call center because that is all he is good paying for, its awful work but its consistent and pays. If he is completely miserable, that is his problem. Least he has a job.


Not everyone can just kick their feet up and let the government or parents let them cruise through life. Everyone wants to kill themselves, its part of the modern human condition.

>>22282
The word is arbitrary... I still care for him and value him as a person. Maybe the friendship isn't mutual, but that doesn't mean much to me. I try not to bother him with my problems, but maybe I just radiate toxicity.

>Everyone wants to kill themselves, its part of the modern human condition.
Everyone is no concern of mine. I only care about him, and I know he's not a special snowflake in the greater scheme of things, but I'm still willing to do as much as I can to keep him alive. I think his mental condition + resilience is weaker than most others, but whatever.

Been on and off, mostly for survival purposes.

never

I already gave it an earnest shot but now I'm destined to be a shut-in I guess.

You can go outside and formally stop being a shut-in, but you'll never stop being one inside.

I don't even know why I care. I'd try so hard to make people like me or to just get along with people whenever I'd have the chance, but in the end I just can't fucking stand them. Sometimes I'd get sad or even a bit jealous when I see people with friends or lovers. Part of me wants to experience these things as someone who has never really had any of that. Heck I find myself very grateful when people actually reach out and try to talk to me or when people show any kind of interest in me. Most of the time however I honestly find them annoying. It makes me feel like a massive hypocrite when I want to have friends, but more often than not the people who I talk with online end up being a nuisance. Maybe not right away, but in talking with people a lot of the times I'll slowly start to wish they'd leave me alone so I can get back to whatever it was I was doing. Most people are just tiresome to be around and I enjoy being alone, but it still feels like I'm missing out...

Even with the romance side of things, as a nearly 30 year old virgin it bothers me at times that I've never had the chance to get involved in a relationship. it boggles my mind how people treat each other so horribly but keep going back for more, where as I've had nothing but the best intentions and have gotten nothing. Thing is though, When I really (and I mean REALLY) stop to think about the idea of being in a relationship with someone it fills me with a bit of dread. Sexual intercourse doesn't seem bad when it's in the 2D form, but the 3D variant is just disgusting to me and is not something I want to see let alone take part in. I shiver at the thought of kissing someone, and I don't even much like physical contact with other people. I'm gonna die alone, and it's in my best interest, but it doesin't really feel that way sometimes.

>>22182
>it boggles my mind how people treat each other so horribly but keep going back for more
Sexuality is inversely correlated with how nice you are. If you're trying hard to please people unconsciously think you're lower status and become sexually and socially repulsed. Are you suddenly not attracted to women because they mock you with contempt? That's what drives your attraction.

There's nothing more offputting than some sad, mentally unstable loser. Man or woman.

>>22183
The people I meet rarely show contempt for me (as far as I know), It's usually indifference. I don't beg people to be my friend or try to use pity if that's what you're thinking. I'm also not dumb enough to make my problems known unless I'm talking to someone with the same problems, let alone act mentally unstable. In fact people repeatedly take interest in me and like me a lot at first, but gradually loose interest and drift away. You might think that they realize deep down I want to be left alone, but I don't believe this to be the case. It happens even with people I do enjoy talking with.

>There's nothing more offputting than some sad, mentally unstable loser. Man or woman.
Personally I find them far more appealing than the alternative.

>>22184
>Personally I find them far more appealing than the alternative.

Same. Birds of a feather.

>Because normie platitudes don't work for people that don't come with the normie chip pre-installed

As he says, people that had happy normal childhoods and normal relationships with people and learned how to deal with them are incompatible with people that had neither of those things. They can't understand how these "patients" deal with stuff and why they take life like they do.

/thread

>>22171
When you're forced to abandon NEETdom, why don't you guys become therapists so you can help people like yourselves?

>>22172
How am I supposed to help anyone when I can't help myself?

>>22171
Since you quoted me... What I meant was slightly different. There is a variation between people that goes beyond experiences and learning, something we are born with or without, which is what I refered to as "chip". That's why there are introverts and extroverts, people who are naturally reclusive and people who need others' attention all they long. I had a relatively normal childhood and I've been able to survive in a few relationships, yet my "wiring" never changed... Always remained a hermit of sorts, getting anxious over social situations, getting stressed when approached by people I don't trust and so on.

My reply was more meant to emphasize that psychologists and therapists tend to make the mistake of giving advice from the viewpoint of a normally wired person, without taking into account the variations in character and personalities that their patients have... resulting in the patients trying methods that will ultimately hurt then, both short-term and in the long run.

Please remember never to underestimate how circumstance affects people. Someone whose childhood and life others might envy, could secretly be ridden with an amount of misery (that when unveiled) others will definitely not want to go through in exchange for that very same stranger's life they wish for.

>>22172
Being able to relate does not equate to being able to professionally help someone with psychological issues. There is a lot of training and knowledge behind therapy. Plus >>22173 is right too.

I can't stop thinking about Lain. It's making me extremely depressed. I don't even wish she were real or that I were in her world. I just wish I could, experience her, for lack of a better word. Sort of like how she became omnipresent herself. It's tough to describe but all I can say definitively is that everything else feels inadequate in comparison.

>>22026
>and technological substitutes for suicide may become available in the near future.
True, I never thought of that.

I want to die, please kill me.

>>22085
Hi, me too.

>>22064
>I wish I was still a kid when I didn't have to worry about adult responsibilities and society.
Don't we all, anon...

>>22065
I don't. I despise my younger self.

I usually just buy myself a small gift.

but this year, my gf came here from Japan!

(USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST)

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