I normally talk by myself a lot but I fear that my parents hear me from time to time and feel bad for me. I feel bad for me as well so I kind of understand them.

>>21493
>Not really conversations just one-liners like "you fucking retard" or something like that when I did something stupid.

I do this too, although it's always an internal voice. I also tend to have longer internal conversations with myself when I'm doing mundane daily tasks like showering, eating, or cleaning.

Only when they malfunction, mostly to my car and computer. Also I've talked to plants before pls dont die I say and they die half of the time.

I have high hopes for AI, shit just look at Tay, its amazing how far tech has come.

Try watching late night informercials while you suffer your insomnia.

>>19496
it wouldn't bother you if you were a schiz
u r aapd, see dsm5 for more info

I still live with my Parents and older sister, and I still feel lonely and bored as fuck, especially since my father has chronic Gilian Beret now (I fucked up spelling that), I'm just afraid that eventually we're just all going to die a sad death that won't be of any importance.

I wish I had the means to live alone...

>>21438
Are you happy yourself?

>>21439
I'm just neutral.

olev

I dropped out of highschool.
Closest thing I ever had to a real friend was only using me for personal gain and we haven't spoken in many years. Almost 28 now and have never truly been with a girl. wasted the best years of my life living as a hikkimori with little to show for it.
Been fired from every job I ever had and am scared to get a regular job. Too stupid for school too. Pretty sure my dad is ashamed of me and my mother is disappointed in me. I've never gained any sort of skills or talents. When my mom dies I'm pretty much fucked. The only thing I've ever done with my life was somehow create a website that has been lingering on the verge of death for years, and the main draw of it has been copied by other sites which are more popular.

>>21401
if I'm honest, I dont really have most of the issues of other posters on this board... I dont have any real issues of shame or depression, and can interact fine with normies when I have to, and dont really mind doing so.(though Id never really go out of my way to over my actual friends). There are other reasons I like hanging around places like this.(nothing like 'lol look at the losers' or 'pfhaha these freaks take waifu seriously' or anything like that.)
That probably puts me in a class of more 'functional' or mentally healthy otaku-types along with the much more normie-seeming types from /a/, or reddit anime boards or something, even though ive never visited or wanted to visit any places like that. Its those sorts of people Ive noticed the obnoxious, insecure self deprecation from most prolifically, where it doesnt just feel like normal, healthy self-deprecating humor but like theres an actual message that 'these things I like are shit, garbage, worthless' somewhere in there, thats somewhat serious. Even though it has seemed to show up in more hardcore otaku types too.
Whenever I hear something like that, if its in a situation where I'd respond, my response always carries some undertone of "Bite me."

>>21413
Don't worry too much, i was kinda in a frenzy yesterday, long day and all.
It makes me somewhat envious seeing otaku couples because they're so rare. I can forgive those by looking away because they still qualify as otakus... ever so slightly, oh well.
It's all a matter of opinion in the end, i'm really tired and don't know what to think anymore, maybe for the best.
Let's enjoy what we like and leave the rest sort itself on it's own, a great advice.

>>21415
The dark side is as shining as the bright side.
Makes us just as blind but there are exceptions.
I hope you'll see someday, otakus don't need to throw their love away.
Just find a different way to reach the stars of empty space.

>>21365
I never really did talk about them much to begin with but I've more or less quit recently. It always seemed like a bad idea to share so much of your personal life online.

To quote Boethius -- the greatest pain is remembering what one has lost, and the greatest joy is self-possession. Does that reflect your thoughts at all?

I think about this a lot myself

Perhaps it's just foolishness, but I often wonder if I did something wrong to deserve how crappy my life can be at times. I often wonder if there really is a god and he has forsaken me for my Atheism, or if Karma is real and I'm doing something bad or evil without realizing it.

No, thats silly. The universe doesn't want to punish you. The universe is indifferent.

>>21426
Not OP but thank you for posting

Too many to count.

Valentine's day is mostly an American thing. On the world scale the spike is not very high.

It's not even "back in the days" anymore. Things that only happened maybe yesterday become a source of crushing shame for me, on top of all the run-of-the-mill kid on the internet stuff. I even cringe at things I've said on this website.

>>20991
I sometimes make weird noises when I remember a shameful moment. Now, it's not bad when I'm at home, I'm used to talking to myself, but it also can happen outside. Usually the voice is like "aaaaaaaargh".

>>21016
I do this too & I'm probably going to look back on it in a few years and cry, just like everything else

Over the years I've been doing shit I regret on a daily basis from mistakes to decisions that have caused me and others great harm while most recover from things I've done I do not really recover. I can't be very forgiving with myself for anything I've done whether it was something I said or something I did the past is not something I can change and I never seem to learn my lesson I keep doing shit I regret. Even recently stuff I did will probably haunt me for a long time or the rest of my days. I don't have a real way to cope with feelings of shame, regret, or dread that I'll do something again. I can hold onto something for years usually resentments of people or things that happened. As a result I suffer from depression and I feel I may be developing anxiety now because the future looks very dark for me I feel I'll just keep making mess ups because I don't know how to get what I want without hurting someone in the process.

>so I get this anxiety issue where I just want to dissapear or run away to a place where nobody I know will ever find in order to never have to deal with the things I did in my past ever again.
I've been wanting to do that OP, I want to move to some desolate isolated place and start over because of all the that is on my mind constantly but I feel even than I'd mess that up to.

Maybe get a different one? Possibly at a place where you don't directly interact with the mechanics.

>>20045

That would mean going to some place like Pep Boys where you are getting ripped off no matter who you are. Finding a more honest mechanic is a better endeavor.

If you have an old car learn mechanic and diy.

>>20044
Just tell em "Look I'm tired of your shit carlos, just fix my car already"