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22420 No. 22420 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
Do you ever talk to people offline about your online friends, or mention them at all to anyone? Do you think family would consider you crazy if your only friends were internet people?
4 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 22498 [Edit]
When I used to I'd just refer to them as my cousin's friend if I ever had a story to tell about them. Otherwise, no I didn't specify it was my internet friend.
>> No. 22504 [Edit]
Depends on the person and situation. Some are more open to online friends than others and a lot of times there's no real need to specify so I don't.

On the occasion it's apt to mention they're online it's usually something along the lines of "A buddy of mine I game with out in [state/country]" then some reason why their location is relevant. Like "haha those crazy commies in cali".

All my friends are online though. I think at one point it used to bother my family but now they've just accepted it. People I have to associate with offline would probably find it weird if they found out but I don't think it'd come as too much a surprise to them.
>> No. 22515 [Edit]
I mention them in passing like "someone online I talk to said X" but never in more detail like what websites I go on or who they are. I think my friend thinks I go on 4chan mainly which is pretty amusing.
My father doesn't believe that I have friends online, he thinks you have to be face to face to really connect with someone. He said that I don't even know their real names so how can we be friends.
I remember he once told me he used to have a friend as a teenager that everyone just called by his nickname and he couldn't actually remember his real name and doesn't think anyone even knew it. So I don't think he gets it
>> No. 22557 [Edit]
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22557
The very few people offline I know consider my online hobbies extremely weird, for obvious reasons - being a disgusting weeb and failure at life.

As for online, I'm eager to socialize (IRC, namedfag forums) .. at first. But once the circlejerk gets too .. jerky, I flee. Hence the preference for anon boards.

Anybody with similiar abandonment issues?

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22499 No. 22499 hide watch quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
Let's start a book club, Tohno-chan!

Meeting place and time are currently undecided, though I'm thinking that a Skype group will be sufficient. Text only, since it might get hectic otherwise. I might be a bit optimistic, but I think it'll be a fun experience.

Let's read roughly a hundred pages a week and meet up weekly to discuss the book. My schedule will be as flexible as yours, so whenever is the best time for you guys will the best time for me. If a hundred pages sounds a lot, or the book takes a lot more digesting, we can readjust.

Here are the books I have in mind:

The Fifth Head of Cerberus
The Intuitionist
The Rediscovery of Man
Ficciones

Any other book ideas are welcome, but this is just a list to start us off.
>> No. 22500 [Edit]
eh, i'd be interested if you want to discuss books in irc or something. i'm not installing skype on my computer, that's been exploitable for a while
>> No. 22501 [Edit]
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22501
I'd be up for it.

I've read Ficciones, it's very good, and as a collection of short stories works well even if people haven't read the entire thing. Haven't heard of any of the others, but I'd give them a chance.

Why bother with Skype? We can just post in this thread, or maybe use IRC if people especially want real-time discussion.
>> No. 22502 [Edit]
>>22500
>>22501
I like the idea of real-time feedback, but I think it'd be slow and dead so a thread will probably suffice.

Do you have any preference on what book to read?
>> No. 22505 [Edit]
I'm down for using this thread too, too hard to coordinate a live chat. Always plenty of people that can't make it for one reason or another and we probably won't have too many people to begin with. Plus it helps keep the board a bit more active.

I don't really have a preference for which book to pick, they all look decent. Maybe throw up a poll or just use a random number generator to decide?

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21847 No. 21847 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
Just like the title asks, how do you deal with those lonely nights? Do you hug your dakimakura? For those of you without one, what do you do? Hug a regular pillow? A stuffed animal? Clump the sheets together and hug those? How do you cope?

I myself usually hug the body pillow I got from Bed Bath, & Beyond. It doesn't really make me feel any less lonely but it's nice for the simple reason that I get to hug something that my arms can actually wrap around, some nights I hug the stuffed doll I made myself. It isn't as effective as it used to be at making any negative emotions less intense but I try to stick with it anyway since it's very important to me.

How about you?
20 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 22232 [Edit]
>>22211
I was not aware one was a high number.
>> No. 22238 [Edit]
>>22232
Ive seen at least two here
>> No. 22241 [Edit]
>>22238
I found that second one you might have been talking about but I didn't make that thread.
>> No. 22473 [Edit]
Read for an hour then sleep, hugging a pillow to my chest as i lay on my back listening to asmr videos on youtube

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21511 No. 21511 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
Does the prospect of being alone for the rest of your life bother you? Please be honest.
40 posts and 6 images omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 21942 [Edit]
>>21932

I've had to readjust to regular contact with non-relatives. The only way to relearn this stuff is to expose yourself to it- force yourself to talk to people on Skype (or wherever else you can find people who want to talk) regularly.
>> No. 22442 [Edit]
it used to, i think it still does, not as bad as it used to
i tried but when you let people in you're bound to get hurt, i'll just occupy myself with things that can't hurt me, like drawing
>> No. 22443 [Edit]
It creeps up on me every now and then. I don't need or want friends, but I do want love - an absolute, perfectly compatible love with another person or thing. Someone with whom to stand, alone against all.

I know it's stupid and impossible, at least insofar as 3D is concerned. When I'm able to distract myself in a 2D fantasy though, at least I can feel some comfort.
>> No. 22654 [Edit]
I'm okay with it. It's also absolutely gut wrenching to think that I'll never meet the girl from my dreams. I can't really explain it.

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22383 No. 22383 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
I've been thinking. This might be obvious to some but it seems to me the more complicated and advanced live becomes, the more miserable it becomes in turn. So much is expected of people in first world countries these days that it becomes very easy to think you aren't living your life to it's fullest. Between schooling, carers, and how complicated relationships are, how could anyone not feel overwhelmed and over stressed?
It's also been my understanding that the more people seem to know about the world the worse they feel about it, where as those who live in ignorance do so blissfully.
It stands to reason that someone might feel bad for not having x or y or z if they see other people have it and believe it improves their life or makes them happy, but what if they don't even know x,y, or z even exist? Then there's nothing to feel bad about right? Like wise, you might feel like shit for failing some important test or class, but what if you never attended that school in the first place? You might say to that "if I don't then I wont get a well paying job!" But then what if you didn't need a need paying job? If an average or low paying job was enough, you could bypass a lot of pain and suffering just to get something you may not even need. In my experience, people with well paying jobs and/or lots of money don't even seem to use much of it anyway and stay miserable. It can almost be like a drug where the more you get the more you want, and the less rewarding it feels as you gather more and more.

Point is, do you think we'd all be better off and more content with life if we got away from all these social expectations? If we stopped pushing each other to live with ever increasing standards of living, and if we stopped wanting things that are always just out of reach. Sure that kills a person's motivation to 'make something of themselves', but maybe that's not for everyone? Time and time again I see people suffering and stressing out over silly things and I just can't help but think. If it's so bad, why not just drop it?
8 posts and 1 image omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 22428 [Edit]
>>22391
It's like you're describing my entire NEET life.
>> No. 22429 [Edit]
I guess a weird irony is that as humans become more powerful, they also become less free. So many are controlled by the need for "progress" and to stay in line. Even thoughts seem to be clouded by self-deception. There are existential philosophies that believe that we are possible of being authentic though, but I don't think attempting that brings "contentness".
>> No. 22431 [Edit]
>It's also been my understanding that the more people seem to know about the world the worse they feel about it
>where as those who live in ignorance do so blissfully.
Ah, the way it has been for many thousand years.
'For in much wisdom is much grief: and he that increaseth knowledge increaseth sorrow.'
I've seen it personally. Not a ignorance that annoys but a innocent ignorance. Makes you lament all that effort wasted into seeking knowledge.

>It stands to reason that someone might feel bad for not having x or y or z if they see other people have it and believe it improves their life or makes them happy...
Dawkins' explains the spreading of these cultural ideas, such as being rich is the meaning to life, as 'memes'. A person gets 'infected' with these memes, it becomes his meaning to life, and then infect others to think the same. The reason being, for the latter, is: if the people around him don't think the same then it calls into question his very reason to exist. This happens without them knowing; the dissolute avoid confronting such issues.
Capitalism benefits greatly from these people.
>> No. 22434 [Edit]
>>22383
holy crap that image is cute

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22330 No. 22330 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
I feel like shit. Like I'm really not worth it. I'm so selfish, no one will ever like me. God, I just don't know anymore, everything feels horrible. I don't even know good from bad moments anymore. All I ever do is cause trouble. I'm sorry for posting this, I just wanted to blow off some steam.
1 post omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 22337 [Edit]
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22337
I love you anon.
>> No. 22338 [Edit]
>>22330
Welcome to the rest of your life.
>> No. 22341 [Edit]
Learn to appreciate yourself, regardless if others do or not.
>> No. 22389 [Edit]
What makes you think you're so selfish?

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22367 No. 22367 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
How did your life change after that, if it did change? How did you change, if you changed afterwards? How did others change, is they changed afterwards?
7 posts and 4 images omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 22380 [Edit]
>>22375
>Suicide results when someone determines that their life absolutely will not get any better, but I can't really understand that way of thinking.
>As long as you're alive good things will happen.
It's not that good things can't happen, it's also that your life can be so shitty the negative things overwhelm the little positivity you may have left. It's not that simple.
>> No. 22382 [Edit]
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22382
Ye,
half a year after I changed school in 11th grade.
I was sick at that time and we assumed that it might be scarlet, since it was passing around the city it that time.
He was the only person in the school, I could feel fine around with, without any signs of being annoyed or aggressive.
From what I've heard he did it after a girl ended her relationship with, he also said things like "I wouldn't mind if a car ran me over", before he did it.
My father drove me to his funeral, but while I was there he and my brother went to a hardware store, so I had to wait for them for half an hour after the funeral.
Then, on the way home they wanted me to tag along in a big store for instruments, although I simply wanted to sleep.
My sister also asked me a few times, if I was also planning on a suicide.
I don't think alot about it nowadays, but sometimes I still wonder what my life would be like, if he was still alive.
>> No. 22386 [Edit]
My friend in high school killed himself a few days before Christmas. Saw him two days before he did it and he seemed fine. Had complete assholes for parents, though. They were barely upset at all at the funeral and got annoyed at his younger siblings for crying and embarrassing them. Apparently he had gotten into a fight with them and then went into the basement and hung himself. Still wonder to this day if it was really a suicide...
>> No. 22387 [Edit]
>>22374
That's incredibly unfair of your mother man.

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22088 No. 22088 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
What will you do with your computer and belongings when you decide to kill yourself?
7 posts and 1 image omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 22100 [Edit]
>>22095
I think I got it here. Did you also make some old guy with a swastika torso? I kinda like her smug smile.
>>22098
It's a partial upload of a book on suicide methods. Not encouraging it, just something some of us might find interesting.
>> No. 22102 [Edit]
>>22100

Yeah, I did make that! That was actually a self-caricature of what I'd be in twenty years.

I actually posted the other pic on another site (not an imageboard) and no one liked it. But I'm glad that someone else does. I guess that I should make more of them; it has been a while.
>> No. 22349 [Edit]
I've already thrown out or sold most things I own. All I've got left of any value is my pc and old pokemon cards.
>> No. 22355 [Edit]
I will leave my best shows, movies, e-books, etc on an external drive. Things I'd share with my family or show my children if I had any. Things like Ghibli, Shinkai Makoto, GitS, Carl Sagan's Cosmos/books, beautiful photos and artwork. All my porn will be on an encrypted drive that I will bury somewhere. Why? I can't bring myself to delete it, I get this stupid sense of accomplishment from finding, sorting, and keeping a collection of good fap material.

My clothes will likely be donated to charity. My relatives are superstitious, they think clothes I've worn will bring bad luck. As for my other stuff, I hope they will benefit my sister or anyone. My sister gets the small amount of neet-bux money I've saved over the years. She is the only one to really bother with me, even though she has her own life.

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22296 No. 22296 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
Back in high-school I used to live off 4 to 6 hours sleep, felt like shit but I could do it (probably bad since I replayed a game I played as a teenager and forgot entire levels from it existed).
Nowadays I cannot physically get up unless it's 8 hours sleep, I just sleep through my alarm even after 6 hours sleep.

Is it just getting old? Even though I read the older you get the less sleep you need.
Any tricks?
How is you guys sleep?
7 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 22311 [Edit]
>>22304
I'm not even entirely sure how long I sleep for on average. I stay in bed for around 10 hours but at least 3 of those I spend on my laptop and I lay awake for what seems like hours.
Maybe I only sleep 3 hours or something ridiculous like that, it would explain why I feel so shitty.
>> No. 22326 [Edit]
I am this way too due to delayed sleep phase disorder. If I set several very loud alarms to go off at once I can wake up, but my body is freezing cold and I'll shake like mad, even throw up sometimes. Back in high school I could pull off 5 or 6 as well, it started around 18.
>> No. 22327 [Edit]
>>22326
Sounds awfully similar to how I am.

When I said I sleep through alarms, it's a bit more complicated. I set multiple at different times; the first one often I hear, physically get up and turn it off then go straight back to bed; the second one I either sleep through without hearing, hear it and leave it ringing until it turns itself off or get up and turn it off and go back to bed, and the third is the same as the second.

I am also always cold when I wake up, even in warm Springs and hot Summers, and that being one of the reasons I don't want to get out of bed. Sometimes I do shake but I am kind of conscious of it, like, I do it to warm up my body.
Never vomited though.

It also started around 18 for me but this is when I became NEET so I've been assuming going to bed at 6a.m. and not being able to psychically wake up was because of the NEET lifestyle.
>> No. 22354 [Edit]
I get about 8-9 hours of sleep a day. Any less than that and I feel like shit.

Because my body won't let me sleep until I'm dead tired, my sleep schedule is all over the place and generally pretty fucked though.

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22332 No. 22332 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
What do you think about it? Suicide has had different purposes before such as being an action to incite social change or being a method of escape from pain. We all know what those useless parrots think that dare call themselves "helpful" but what are your thoughts?
3 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 22339 [Edit]
>>22332
I don't think it should be used as a tool to manipulate others after death (ie: forcing others to feel guilty or incite social change, as you brought up), but other than that, I dislike the fact that it's against the law to harm oneself. I certainly don't advocate that anyone here do it- I'd much rather that you found something to live for, even if it it's selfish or minor- but I still believe every person has the right to end their own life if they feel like it. The imprisonment of people that are already trying to kill themselves into hellish psychiatric wards is a horrible form of torture.
>> No. 22340 [Edit]
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22340
I suppose that it is sometimes appropriate, but most of the time it seems like a waste. The vast majority of suicides are done for pretty stupid reasons, like relationship problems or something materialistic.

Oddly, those who kill themselves due to lack of resources or money tend to off themselves with no problems whatsoever, whereas those who have depression tend to have a life instinct that kicks in right when they are about to die. Just imagine experiencing wanting to live right after you made the decision to die; that is way, way worse than being suicidal, I think.
>> No. 22342 [Edit]
>>22340
It's a common thought that depression is a mechanism which evolved to impede self destructive action like suicide.

I would speculate that those people who kill themselves easily (like traders jumping off of buildings) are highly motivated individuals and are as far from depression as anyone else.
>> No. 22348 [Edit]
I've had several bouts of depression recently and tempted suicide but I could never even begin to do it. Like what >>22333 said, there's so much left to do and see it'd be so petty to kill myself just because I feel sad more than I like. Plus I can't imagine the impact it would have on the people around me, I'm no saint but I know people would be greatly affected by my death, especially my family.

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22247 No. 22247 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [Edit]
So, how do you escape the feeling of worthlessness? I mean, the best I can do is tell my mind to shut up, but that doesn't really accomplish anything.
3 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 22252 [Edit]
Get new hobbies.

Reasoning is, your current hobbies are not making you feel better so there's no reason to continue doing them.
>> No. 22255 [Edit]
>>22252
What if I dont have any hobbies because the feels are so heavy they impede me from doing anything I enjoy?
>> No. 22259 [Edit]
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22259
Eat or watch cute girls eating cute things in cute ways.
>> No. 22261 [Edit]
>>22259
Why not just eat a cute girl and cut out the middle man?

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