>>
Chris
04/10/18(Tue)07:57
No. 20930
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Yes, I made an attempt in 2014 after I lost everything I had
My home, my church, my sanity, my health. But I would lose it all again if I didn't lose my love as well
These years have not been kind to me. I've seen things that no one should see, and I've seen them with a bitter, hardened heart no one should have
I learned to kill just for you, did you know that? I wanted to track you down and find where you lived. I wanted to find you so I could duel you to the death for her hand. I couldn't stand not being her one and only. However, now and forever I won't get to be.
I think back sometimes to that day, and think the thought "Has anything gotten better since then?" as if tallying the good times since the light left my life would make the darkness any less cold and deadly
It was not worth it. Nothing since then has been worth it.
Waking up alone, screaming, in a room full of deafening noise for years on years has made me wary of living. The constant violence makes me wish for gentler places.
But those places aren't for me. They never were. And now as the pygmalionists are driven from /a/ and every other place while irony abounds, I find myself looking for a vision of love. A vision of something real to remind me that that place was real, I didn't dream that time up out of an eternal nightmare. That even if I am denied citizenship, that place exists somewhere. Existed somewhere.
I loved her, I swear I did. I wasn't willing to fight and die for something insignificant
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