NEET is not a label, it's a way of life!
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27913 No. 27913 [Edit]
-When I was younger, I used to worry incessantly about doing something with "passion" and being poor OR having money but hated my career. 18 was a hectic time because I thought I had to pick a career that I was going to be in for 10 years. Instead, what I found out is that there are all these jobs that will pay you better than minimum wage, take a shorter amount of time to train for, and can be done through the internet. Do that instead. If you're worried about being locked in to a 9 to 5, learn a proper skill online and do freelance work. If you're worried about what you're going to do to make money as an "adult", do one of these. Am I the last fucking one to figure that out? Anyway.. I got one, but if you're young, you probably shouldn't bother with a degree. Pick something you think you'd be good at.
-I mentioned it above, but use the internet to work from a laptop. Not only is it more convenient in terms of dealing with people and stress from going outside, but you can potentially move anywhere you want. Go to a country where the cost of living is low, low, low. Download google translate on your phone, then download the relevant languages that you will need so you can translate without an internet connection.
-Being able to move to where you want to go will enable you to get away from people who... don't treat you like you should be treated. That might be open disdain, pity, etc.etc., but try your best to get away from "energy vampires". When I left my small, small life behind, I thought I would be deathly lonely, leaving behind my parents and one or two distant old friends who reached out occasionally. It turns out that I am something like a natural loner.. Not to boast but I have almost never felt lonely at all, approaching 30 years old. Get away from those people
-If you're wondering what to eat to be healthy, do a "paleo" diet as a starting template. It's inexpensive and healthy: just whole foods, meat, veg, potatoes, some fruit. And eat the sample thing every day. This saves mental energy from having to figure out what to eat. Routine is good.
>> No. 27923 [Edit]
I found a way of dealing with my feelings of self-loathing, maybe someone could make use of it.

My issue was with having said or done things that I was told and accepted were wrong, but being unable to figure out what I should've done instead. I couldn't process it and just felt bad all the time.

The key thing is that your emotions exist to promote or inhibit behavior; you feel bad so you won't do the bad thing in the future. But to apply that you need understanding. So first, work out what you do or don't believe is wrong. And then once that's in place, ask yourself:

What did I do that was wrong?
Why precisely is it wrong?
How could I have known that?
Why didn't I see it?

If you can answer every one of these, then you know what to change.
If you cannot change, or if there are any of these you cannot answer, then you couldn't have done any better. It's not your fault. The blame might lie with the other party, or just the circumstance itself. But it's not your fault.

It's still a struggle; I have to remind myself of it a lot. But I'm feeling much better.

Post edited on 21st Dec 2022, 2:25pm
>> No. 27924 [Edit]
>>27923
>How could I have know that?
>Why didn't I see it?
These might also be useful for people who struggle with overthinking or regret. I.e. you make some decision that turns out to be less than ideal and then become consumed with anxiety/rumination over having made that decision. Often you're making decisions without access to perfect information, so there's no way you could have done better in the first place.

At least that's the theory, in practice even knowing that it's never really helped assuage me.
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