NEET is not a label, it's a way of life!
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24769 No. 24769 [Edit]
Is there anything that most people would call simple that you struggle with?
I have too many things and I need to get rid of some things but it's hard to bring myself to do it. I worry that someday I'll need one of those things but I don't want to become a hoarder. If this keeps up though, I will. I'm sure most would be able to just trash anything without a thought.
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>> No. 24770 [Edit]
I have a phobia of riding in cars. Being in a car for more than 5-10 minutes makes me either very nauseous or very sleepy. There are people who can barely function in life which can drive, but I've never been able to will myself to, despite having a very successful career.
>> No. 24771 [Edit]
>> No. 24772 [Edit]
If you ever need it, you can just get another one. That's what I tell myself. I never ended up needing whatever I threw out yet.
>> No. 24773 [Edit]
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I find it hard to look people in the eye, or even straight at them for too long. It feels too intense. I also can't seem to keep organized.
>> No. 24798 [Edit]
Comprehending instructions in a job environment. People get so pissed when I try to work for them because I fucking suck dick at simple things like `go get the X from the back`.
>> No. 24799 [Edit]
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Understanding what people are saying. Legitimately hearing and comprehending their words.

I hear whatever sounds people are enunciating out of their mouths, but am unable to assemble a word. I speak 4 different languages fluently, 2 of which English and French, and another one my native. It's the same all across. The only language I'm somewhat successful at is Japanese. Maybe because it's very context dependent?

This situation is worsened in very loud or crowded environments. Usually it's not a big deal at home or a quite office. It was hell though during the few years I worked at a factory.
Amusingly, I'm also terrible at picking up gestures and body language, unless they're quite obvious or otherwise "universally recognizable", and had a tendency to talk very fast, though I think the latter was related to social anxiety, which I gradually got over.

On the bright side, I picked up the habits of speaking slowly and trying a clear pronunciation, and of walking over and slightly turning my head so that my ear faces the person talking to me, which I feel is usually well received, particularly in Japan, since it's kind of rude to face a person directly in the eyes, but this gesture indicates that you're still paying special attention to them. Don't forget to nod your head too.
In fact, I'm ever grateful to the Japanese language and culture for helping me getting over my difficulties socializing, «properly».
>> No. 24800 [Edit]
I feel like I would fit better in northern Europe or Japan than in my country. Here I'm Mr. Autism because I don't like to touch people or shout all the time, in those places I would look almost normal. Worse is how most people in my country considers those cultures "sick" because they don't behave like incivilized monkeys.
>> No. 24801 [Edit]
South America?
>> No. 24802 [Edit]
No, but basically the same.
>> No. 24803 [Edit]
I feel the exact same way. When I visited it was amazing to see people act so civilized for a change. Coming back home to the states was depressing. People here seem to constantly try to one up each other by way of who can be the most loud and obnoxious.
>> No. 24816 [Edit]
The states seem kind of civilized compared to my country. At least they usually have a normal, human-like, schedule.
>> No. 24817 [Edit]
The states seem kind of civilized compared to my country. At least they usually have a normal, human-like, schedule.
>> No. 24819 [Edit]
Are you in one of those places where mid-day naps are normal for everybody and being late is socially acceptable?
>> No. 24820 [Edit]
Also, the schedule in the US isn't normal, it's fucking insane and there's nothing healthy about it. Twelve years olds shouldn't be waking up at 6 am.
>> No. 24826 [Edit]
There's honestly hundreds of things that I could list off here in this thread. But I'll start off one thing at a time and update my posts as the days go by. Maybe come back once a week to this thread for a further conversation as well as contributing to the thread. Besides I don't want to turn this into a blog of sorts. Also if anyone has any questions for anything. But first thing is I have an extremely difficult time driving. I literally cannot do it. I'm worried that I won't ever be able to function properly in life due to this as I don't live in a city or a populated enough area with public transportation. Also in my area if you can't drive, you also can't have a job unless you can find someone who has the time to spare to take you to work and pick you up every single day. Sadly, I'm not in such a situation. So this has left me to be a NEET for pretty much the entire time since I finished high school which has been more than a decade's time already. I've also tried to practice driving on and off every single year and ending in absolute failure each time. I have no depth perception and extreme paranoia that I've never been able to overcome. I also have a difficult time functioning as a driver in the left side of the vehicle. I feel as if I'd at least better my odds if I were driving on the right side of the vehicle like a lot of other countries outside of the US does. To me anyways, that seems like the optimal side to be a driver on anyways. Which brings me to another thing, I struggle with a lot of things that the US does that the rest of the world does differently. Sometimes I feel like living here is a curse.
>> No. 24827 [Edit]
I just brought up my post about my phobias driving. But I actually don't have problems being a rider. However, I mostly try to distract myself by observing everything outside looking to the side instead of at the road. Which if I'm looking directly ahead of me I'll get nauseous as you mentioned. So, maybe try that next time?

I also have difficulties with "small talk" and understanding what's appropriate or what's inappropriate to say to people. I also struggle communicating with people who's a bit older than me as well as a bit younger unless the conversation is online in a text form. I communicate insanely better through typing on my keyboard than I do speaking to someone. But what's strange is I actually have great speaking skills and speech but only if I'm talking to myself or say doing a "vlog". Even though I haven't vlogged since the beginning part of the decade as I quit YouTube in 2013.

I also have a problem with eye contact, I always try to force it when I'm having a serious or "professional" conversation with someone though out of attempts for respect. But then I feel so drained and depressed like I'm about to snap. I just can't handle it. I always try to look away or look around at my surroundings.
>> No. 24828 [Edit]
Having conversations, I can't really do it unless it's an argument or giving or asking for information.

I can't use Lawn Mowers because I am afraid of them so I use a weed trimmer to mow the lawn.

I can't work either.
>> No. 24829 [Edit]
>Are you in one of those places where mid-day naps are normal for everybody and being late is socially acceptable?

Naps are a myth and no one does that because almost everyone works until late but the part about being late is absolutely true. More than acceptable it's the norm.
Also problem here is how it's perfectly normal to sleep just 4-5 hours, everyone makes noise even past midnight and it's common to eat at 16:00 then to eat again at 23:00 or even later.
>> No. 24830 [Edit]
I see no problem with midday naps, being late being the norm, eating at 16 and 23 and making noise past midnight. I wish it was like this here.
>> No. 24949 [Edit]
Tying my shoelaces, seriously. Everytime I tie then, it's only a few minutes in and they come untied again. I tried tying them with force, as some advised me to, but my feet feel like being suffocated. I don't know how people can walk with their shoelaces on. Also, telling my level of hunger, pretty weird how you can't really measure the hunger of your own body.
>> No. 24950 [Edit]
I assume you have tried this, but I usually have to double knot them to prevent them from getting united. There are also different knots themselves you can use, but doubling knotting worked for me so I didn't bother with the fancy knots.
>> No. 24951 [Edit]
There's a strong knot and a weak knot. Strong knots are good, weak knots are shit. I don't know exactly how it works, but you have to lead with your left hand to create a strong knot. You can tell if you did it correctly if the knot is perpindicular to the shoe. If it's sort of crooked, you did it wrong. You can just undoe the last step of the knot and do the opposite of what you did the first time to get it right.
>> No. 24952 [Edit]
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I've tried but I actually don't remember the results. If I recall correctly, at the time I thought that it would sometimes come untied in a way that was even harder to tie again, the laces would end up really tight and some nail work was required. As for fancy knots, I have already difficult with normal knots, so I don't feel like trying harder ones.
I'm shocked. I read this yesterday and saw some videos to try to get the hang of it, but I had trouble with the process required. Just now, my mother ordered me to buy bread from a nearby grocery store, and I decided to test this method. With my usual method of tying shoelaces, they would come untied around 2 times, even in this short distance. I headed off in direction of the store, looking down at my shoes every 10 secs or whatever, and surprisingly they arrived there just as they left. But there was some major construction work going down there, and I hate these drilling noises, so I decided to head over to another store, which was located on the other side of my house, so I went back all the way and then walked a little more. I even went on little strides along the way. I went inside the store, and they were out of bread. It may be too soon to celebrate, but I think that despite not returning with any bread, this could be called a fortunate experience.
The most impressive is that it was actually easy to do, in the videos the knot looked hard, but I used your advice to differentiate between the two and it worked out.
You sir, are a hero!
>> No. 24953 [Edit]
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Glad to help, anon.
>> No. 24954 [Edit]
File 15753235043.jpg - (187.01KB , 995x1051 , no eye protection - grade F.jpg )
>so I use a weed trimmer to mow the lawn
I would think that edge trimmers would be more terrifying to use. If you're not wearing the proper gear, you're risking cuts on your skin and damage to an eye. Whereas with lawn mowers, you could be naked and not still bear the same risk.
>> No. 24955 [Edit]
Using peppermints works great for me, try it, it helps with nausea.
>> No. 24957 [Edit]
I worked using that, at some point you get used of stones kicking you and you just go berserk and destroy everything without caring about the pain.
Also I was less than 1 cm to lose one foot because one of those shits. Still, better than a chainsaw, chainsaws can even kill you.
>> No. 24958 [Edit]
I never have that problem and I wear eye protection, I don't use a metal blade though.
>> No. 24959 [Edit]
I struggle with using telephones. Every incomming call is basically unwanted and not being able to see who calls makes me avoidant. It's the same with making calls but it gives me anxiety, because I don't really look forward to make calls. When I did an internship at a store I also had to deal with people ringing up the store. I guess my short term memory is pretty bad, so I would forget their names or what they want, being somewhat unable to relay the reason to other employees, because asking again what their name was etc. felt uncomfortable.
>> No. 24973 [Edit]
Phonecalls. I can deal with people perfectly fine, I can talk with them, discuss, no problem.
But having to call someone through the phone fills me with dread. Maybe it's because I can't see them, their body language?
>> No. 24990 [Edit]
Do you guys feel the same while e-mailing someone or with similar forms of communication?
>> No. 24991 [Edit]
It's interestingly the opposite for me: I cannot talk to people in person at all, but it's manageable over the phone precisely because there is no body language needed. You don't need to look people in the eye, you don't have to worry about fidgety hands or restless legs, etc. Additionally the shitty voice codecs help mask flatness in your voice cadence, so you don't need to worry about being engaging or expressive too much.

Emailing is my preferred method of communication, it's a shame it's dying out. One of the reasons I have trouble speaking is that once you say a word you can't really go back and "undo" it, so you have to be able to project into the future to maintain coherence across words and sentences. For some reason I seem to lack that ability, so anything that requires more than a sentence of speech becomes disconnected and incoherent. Email is great because you can edit to your heart's content.
>> No. 24998 [Edit]
>> No. 24999 [Edit]
Not either of them, but I prefer emails over most forms of communication. Having time to think about what I am typing allows me to clearly express what I wish to say, whereas I make more mistakes when speaking out loud.
>> No. 25000 [Edit]
I wish people would use email more when collaborating on software. Git has great support for that, and yet we're stuck with Github.
>> No. 25001 [Edit]
Gitub's PR system is absolutely atrocious. I find it hard to believe that you can even do proper code review with it.
>> No. 25009 [Edit]
that's because github designed their system around being a social media. And because of that, it is also subject to the same shit that social media garbage.
>> No. 25065 [Edit]
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I can’t understand or explain my own emotions. They call it Alexithymia.
>> No. 25079 [Edit]
I struggle with everyday sounds that shouldn't bother me but do nonetheless. Sounds like dogs barking and bags crinkling in particular drive me up the wall.

Post edited on 25th Dec 2019, 7:33am
>> No. 25183 [Edit]
I have the same, especially with children or babies crying.
Some sounds just make me angry to the point where i chipped off a bit of my tooth from grinding my teeth so much.
>> No. 25198 [Edit]
Refraining from scratching my fingers and hand with my nails during these social situations, everytime I get myself into a unwanted dialogue I unconsciously begin the ordeal. Sometimes, most of the time, actually, I only notice after it's done.
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