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23661 No. 23661 [Edit]
When hanging out with people, I try to talk, but most people just give rapid-fire responses to one another. Whenever I try to say anything, the conversation has already moved on, or nobody gave me enough time to say something. Sometimes, people even talk over me.

Yeah, I'm so quiet. Maybe if you gave me the opportunity to talk, you'd hear what I have to say!

It especially sucks when you're with 2 other people. At first, they try to include you in the conversation (even though they do the things I mentioned before). But eventually, they just give up on trying to talk to you, so you end up just being an observer to a conversation between two people.

Or sometimes people will put you on the spot and say "why are you so quiet?" What are you even supposed to say to that? What do they even expect you to say? That's like the one time people will stop talking and listen to you. But when you're put on the spot like that, it's hard to find something to say.

Anyone had any similar experiences?
>> No. 23662 [Edit]
Usually when I am included in some conversation I only listen and rarely say things, seems only to be the natural thing to do, doesn't bother me. When I do have a thing to contribute it might come across as awkward/not as intended or late, so I suppose that does happen at times. Part of that might be me not paying attention enough though.

Post edited on 13th Jul 2018, 10:02pm
>> No. 23664 [Edit]
>>23661
That's what you get for hanging out with normals. Trampling over you verbally is Normaldry 101 and an easy way to establish social hierarchy. Asking someone "Why are you so quiet?" is a "corrective" punishment, letting you know you're behaving outside normals' conventions and that you should change that. It humiliating you is indeed the purpose. Normals generally can't stand silence and tranquillity because they're wired to be collectivists, so the thought of not engaging is alien to them.
>> No. 23666 [Edit]
Yeah, it really gets you a ton of shit. In my case I eventually learned to play the clown in attempt to get them off my case about it but they still see me as "off" and "different" so I'm still treated as the odd one out. If you've ever read No Longer Human it's sort of like that.

I don't like it though. It feels very draining and forced. Something about being so fake fucks with me once I'm alone again. Like I have multiple personalities or something.
>> No. 23667 [Edit]
>>23666
cool, I just got the ebook version of it and I'm gonna use Kindle Word Runner to speed read it
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=noZ3oTgeqYE
>> No. 23668 [Edit]
Happened to me all the time and that's why I hardly talked to anyone until high school really. That was when I met a guy that was actually willing to have lots of one on one conversations where I would fire off random questions and ideas, even though I still weirded most people out... Of course those days are long gone by now. That was also why I couldn't function at all in dumb workplace socials, I didn't even know whether they wanted my opinion and no one really asked for anything. They moved from topics so quickly either so it seemed meaningless.
>> No. 23669 [Edit]
>>23666
I wrote >>23667
I finished reading No Longer Human. Thanks again for the suggestion. It was a good book.

I could relate to feeling different from other people (in a bad way), but not so much the clown/entertainer part. The thing about compliments seeming disingenuous also resonated with me.

The author also had better luck with women than me, but in many other ways, it seemed a lot like my own life. I could relate to the un-person feeling, and the drug and alcohol issues. College, suicidal thoughts, and things like that too.

Despite being written such a long time ago, I feel like the social issues he mentioned are more relevant now than in the past. Kinda prescient. I think today, his attitude would be referred to as imposter syndrome, coupled with depression too.

It was a compelling read and I read it start to finish in one sitting.

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