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23078 No. 23078 [Edit]
I was home schooled throughout my high school life so my education and social life isn't the best. Despite this my parents are forcing me to go to collage. At first I was fine with it because they said they'll help pay, and I guess I wasn't against the idea. But as soon as I started I hit a wall. The first semester I passed with C's but now i'm in the second and i'm failing everything. I have all this pressure coming from multiple sides. For one thing, from what I'm over hearing from everyone the classes are relatively easy but i'm still the lowest in my classes. Second my parents are not only forcing me to go but there helping me pay for it, something that I know is a very rare thing and I shouldn't complain about. And If I don't finish i'll be the only person in my family who didn't go to collage. I've had assignments that I couldn't finish and just skipped class that day, never told my parents they don't even know i'm failing. I Know my parents won't let me dropout because they know I don't any plan for living but I just can't do any of this, this pressure is just unbearable and I can't talk to anyone about it. I feel so bad I've tried cutting myself a few times.
Does anyone else have any pressure on them from someone or something?
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>> No. 23079 [Edit]
> I've had assignments that I couldn't finish and just skipped class that day, never told my parents they don't even know i'm failing.
Either tell your lecturers you couldn't do the assignments because of anxiety and request an extention or drop out. Do one of these two options asap.
>> No. 23080 [Edit]
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23080
>I can't talk to anyone about it
Feel free to join the IRC channel and vent to your heart's content.
>>23078
>I was home schooled throughout my high school life
May I ask why? Answer might give insight as to why the pressure you.
>they said they'll help pay / there helping me pay for it
By "help" do you mean fully pay? or just pay partly? The way you word it makes it seem like the latter.
>never told my parents they don't even know i'm failing
Why not tell them? Even if they are stern people they might give you sound advice.
>Does anyone else have any pressure on them from someone or something?
I do, but it's a ingrained in my blatantly selfish desire to remain a HikiNEET forever. I'm a 30-year-old on-and-off parasite on the German government welfare program and the pressure to get a job and stop being an overall leech is quite harsh. Of course, that's the way it should be, but it does bother me (again, as a selfish prick) that "refugees" get zero pressure yet way more money, opportunities, help and support, while being completely detrimental on a structural and environmental level while I'm basically a stimulus package. Nowadays I just cross my fingers and hope UBI comes soon.
>> No. 23082 [Edit]
I don't have the most job experience, but restaurants are usually ready to hire the inexperienced as dishwashers as such, which is dirty but not too tiring, although some of the better restaurants do get really busy. Also if you're good enough at just grinding shit out like numbers and names (data entry) you might be able to look around for temp office jobs, I had one grading papers, but that usually isn't much more than min. wage either.

My second quarter (my college system was different) was also pretty frustrating especially because throughout my whole freshman year they pushed SJW crap the hardest, but I guess since then I did manage to turn it around and finish my degree.
>> No. 23083 [Edit]
>>23082
I can confirm that restaurants are pretty okay. If you can get a hospitality cert to do basic kitchen hand stuff you can also get a decent wage too because you're technically skilled labour rather than unskilled. I earn 50% on the wait staff where I work and while it's intense when it kicks off at peak service, it's not too bad overall. If I work a sunday for example I'm looking at ~$35/hr and around $50/hr on a public holiday and the certificate was I think $20 and a couple of hours online coursework.

If you can get a cheap apartment, you can live comfortably with decent hours. I work under 20 hours a week and easily pay my expenses with money to spare. I recommend kitchen work if you have the motivation to stick it out since it is very anxiety-inducing to begin with. I had plenty of panic attacks when I first started but it was root hog or die so I had to stick with it and I got used to it.

I'm not from the States though so YMMV.
>> No. 23085 [Edit]
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23085
I've been in this situation before and you need to drop out ASAP.

I got bullied lots in grade school and that led to a mix of home and private schooling where everything was a comfortable little padded room. It was a lot better at the time, but it made college hell. Like you, my parents "helped" pay for it (meaning they bought a few textbooks and gave me some gas money), until the student loans came knocking, at which point it was my responsibility. Didn't even know what I was getting myself into... several years later I was heartbroken and $8800 in debt I was led to believe I wouldn't have to pay back...

College, even a shitty community college like I went to will eat you alive. Being able to learn the material might not even be that important, being able to present it, play the social game to get exceptions and extensions, that's what gets you through college. And I didn't have any of that. Not to mention being able to regiment your time to make sure everything gets done, since colleges don't give a shit about making it easy. They get paid either way; you'll go through periods of nothing to do, and times where your entire life is studying. Point is, you're just not in a place to handle college mentally. When I went, I wasn't either, it's not a knock on you, just a statement of fact.

My advice to you right now would be to drop out before you wreck your GPA and credit too badly. That's what I did, can't get a loan, can't go back to school. Not until I pay off the money I owe at least, and that's going to take a while.

Find a shitty job you can tolerate like >>23083 mentioned. Keep in mind I said "tolerate" not "enjoy" because you're not going to find that. Save your money and get away from your parents. They want the best for you, but it's smothering. You can't breathe with them around, they won't let you because they're too worried "we care so much" "all we want is for you to be happy" they'll say. And the only way you can have that is if you get away and enjoy a sense of independence they've never let you have. After that, maybe then consider going to college. But that's sketchy these days, you're probably better off looking for different forms of employment such as going through the trades.

Also, accept you may have to make alternative housing arrangements depending on area. You're not going to buy a house with most entry level jobs and rent can be really expensive unless you want to live in some ghetto that's going to get broken into. Even if you live in a small town you're going to be looking at $400-500 a month once you factor in the cost of gas. Save your money and buy a van, buy a cheap lot and put a camper on it. Tiny houses are a viable goal for people like us but they require a rather considerable startup cost you're just not going to have for a long time.

A roommate can make renting viable but if you're like me you don't like the idea, and even if you did, you don't know anyone who wouldn't get on your nerves. Try to get something you can own, and pay off rather quickly. Then you won't have any payment to worry about and it's much less stressful. Especially because people like us are flaky, and can have trouble sticking to commitments.

This is the advice I'd give to a younger me. Don't do like I did and drive to college and just sit in the parking lot for a couple hours and drive back home in case your parents checked the milage in the car... Don't enroll for another semester even though you want to quit because you're not sure you'll be able to hold down a job. Don't get yourself into a pile of debt even if it's relatively small. It's a commitment you'll be forced into and a monthly reminder of that horrible, horrible part of your life. And if you just let it go it's going to fuck your credit and make you unable to get a loan for anything. That wouldn't be a problem but it'll force you to rent (and piss money away) or stay with your relatives. And even some apartments do credit checks these days.

Your parents will probably regard these ideas as a "silly waste of time". But this "waste of time" is much preferable to spending seven years of your life in misery because you weren't prepared to deal with the world. All because mommy and daddy had to fawn over their precious child who couldn't be allowed to get a bruise.

Sorry for the wall of text, but your situation is too similar to what I was once going through to avoid lecturing.
>> No. 23096 [Edit]
>>23079
It's too late into the semester for that plus my speech impediment makes it a bit hard over all, and correction it's not that I haven't told my parents them they just don't know that I skiped class a few times. I told them I'm failing but they just told me to keep doing it and don't drop out.
>>23080
>Why was I homeschooled
I don't really know my mother never really gave me a straight answer.
>That story
I always wanted to just run away to California and live off of the welfare. But I don't have a car (i'm burrowing my parent's).
>>23082
>>23083
Yea I knew a guy who lived off of restaurant money, he said it was doable but hard and social. I don't think I can do that.
>>23085
Thanks to the info. I really did think about all that stuff, from just moving out to living in a car. And really I don't think I want that, I don't really know what I want at this point. I think I should just end it here. Thanks for the all the advice, and for the fun times. This site really was a nice distraction from it all.
Thanks Again

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