Yes, the hot and reactive topic that makes everyone with a waifu angry. I want to ask this question: Why is using a waifu as a coping mechanism considered wrong? Specifically, why do people with a waifu get angry when someone else uses that as a mechanism to cope? This applies to OC waifus and choosing a waifu. I am not trying to say that getting mad about it is wrong but instead that maybe it isn't necessary. If a person uses this to cope, is it even working? You can tell them that what they are doing is wrong but do they care when their attempt to cope does nothing good for them? Some would call it "licking their own wounds". Is that truly so bad? Plenty of people have all kinds of pain, is there something so wrong with people trying to simply deal with whatever plagues them so they can simply live normally? Especially since they probably don't even tell anyone. I do understand that it shouldn't be practiced, I just ask why people get mad about it. Let's try and not de-rail this thread into mindless anger and fury, let's please keep some civil discussion that is on-topic. Thank you for reading this and for your responses.
I think that people with a waifu only have problems with other people if they are not taking it seriously. I don't think they'd be angry at someone who got into "waifuism" because of some personal issue as long as he doesn't reduce her to that. If he only uses his waifu as a coping mechanism (in other words if he didn't really fall in love with her) and drops her as soon as the personal issue is resolved (since he doesn't need to cope anymore), the people with waifus are justified to get angry. Unless he wasn't vocal about having a waifu, of course, but I'm pretty sure we're only talking about the people participating in the community as a "waifufag" or otherwise being vocal about it on the internet and thus leading to the topic waifu not be taken seriously. >and choosing a waifu People could get angry about that one. People thinking you can choose a waifu are part of the reason why waifus aren't taken seriously.
At the risk of incurring a lot of anger, I don't mind any of those things. I used to care deeply about the spoken and unspoken "rules" of waifus and loving fictional characters, and judged others based on how they followed them, but lately I just don't care about that anymore. If it's better for them to use it to cope, then they should do what helps. Maybe I just got tired of judging others. I'd rather focus on our commonalities than throw a fit over our differences.
And another question. If choosing or creating a waifu is considered wrong why is Pygmalion used so much as an example of love for fictional characters when he broke one of the main rules of waifus? "Consciously choosing or creating a waifu is not allowed." Sorry if I got something wrong but this is something I have thought about for a while.
>>20680 You really don't seem to get it. There's a reason why I only quoted the "and choosing a waifu" part and not the OC one. There's no rule of "Consciously choosing or creating a waifu is not allowed." Waifufags are no legislature, they can't come up with rules others have to follow or can break. But you shouldn't be surprised when you see them looking down upon people who do consciously choose or create a waifu. Just look at the people who say they chose their waifu, the majority of them just use the term as a synonym for favourite character and they change their waifu regularly which leads to other people thinking that that's what having a waifu amounts to and so not really taking waifufags seriously or being surprised when they read about them really loving the ficitional character. Pygmalion didn't consciously create his waifu. He created something ideal, then fell in love with it. Falling in love with his OC seems genuine, however creating something perfect with the goal of it being his waifu does not. Choosing a waifu is deciding to fall in love with something. Which I think almost never ends in true love (I don't deny that it can but in the beginning it definitely is only lying to oneself). I'm pretty sure even normal people don't think that love is something you can artificially evoke.
>>20682 Ah, that makes sense. Thank you, I've had that question for a while now. Thank you all for your answers, I learned from this thread and I'm glad.
>There's no rule of "Consciously choosing or creating a waifu is not allowed." Waifufags are no legislature, they can't come up with rules others have to follow or can break I think I expressed myself pretty shitty at that part. What I meant is that they haven't really created a community with their own rules and you can join them if you follow those rules or something like that (of course smaller communities exist but I wouldn't take those as a general standard) In my eyes it's just people who made a similar experience, there are no rules. You can't 'join' them, you just are one of them the moment you fall in love with a fictional character. Since that experience is a completely personal one, there are no rights and wrongs as long as your feelings are genuine. I reacted a bit badly to your mention of rules. Sorry for that.
What if Anime had never been invented, how different would your life be? would you have had fallen for a real human female the same way?
>>20685 My life would have been a helluva lot emptier, that's for sure. I don't think I would have fallen in love for anything, much less anyone. Perhaps I'd feel the sense that there must be something more, something I'm missing, a big hole in the chest that can't be filled. I don't know. It's hard to imagine what it would be like.
>>20685 Probably not since I have never even had a crush on someone before I found anime and my waifu, so I would probably just be lonely and spend more time just sitting around and looking at walls.
>>20687 >>20686 I find that hard to believe, a lot fo people will deny it but I bet you will have ended up wit a real girl sooner or latter, Waifuism exists thanks to Anime, if it hadn't been invented you may have struggled, but you will have settled for 3D in the end, in fact most waifuists still end up that way despite claiming 2D is better in the past.
I feel like this is more of a kinda projection thing. People who truly don't feel like their love is real just say that others aren't real. Personally I find it a waste of time because I don't really care if someone is using them as a coping mechanism or not. And even if they are, if they're making their lives better then I don't really see it as a bad thing. Though my own belief is that waifus truly exist to help improve our lives. I feel like if anything a lot of waifuists are pretty young themselves and are just insecure about a lot of things. Not that older people are immune to insecurity, it's just that as you get older you in theory should begin to realize what things are worth getting upset over and this sort of thing isn't something to really worry about.
>>20688 I disagree strongly with your post. Waifus don't exist thanks to anime. Television didn't invent falling in love with fictional characters, before it were books. Idiots were complaining about people losing their grip on reality because of novels, when those first came out. Pretty sure there were quite a few who fell in love with a character even if it hasn't been recorded. People probably fell in love with idealized images since the beginning of humanity. Idealizing another human, making her your godess or shit like that as described in a lot of books, is another face of "Waifuism" in my opinion. They don't fall in love with the actual human but with their image of them. Also Pygmalion has already been mentioned in this thread. Even if it is a story, stuff like that happening isn't that unbelievable. Maybe there were even people who fell in love with ghosts, elementals or shit like that because they strongly believed in those. You really shouldn't take the imagination of humans lightly.
I personally don't get angry at it as I believe love is subjective. But maybe you will understand with this question. Does someone who only likes 3D have a significant other just because they are lonely? Do people make friends to deal with loneliness, regardless if their friendship isn't true? Why have a waifu to deal with loneliness if you truly don't love her? If you are happy with who you are, who am I to tell you to change, stay who you are.
>>20690 Those are not waifus they are platonic love, if they are real people or OCs they are certainly not waifus, and I dont think waifus are supposed to be personal godesses. Lastly the word itself was just invented thanks to Anime referring to Anime girls exclusively. Basically the Japanese are pioneers with 2D, there is no records of it because it didn't happened, most people settled with someone even if they didn't really liked them.
>>20692 Even if you don't regard them as waifus, they share the same concept. It's a one sided love toward something that doesn't really exist in our world, only difference being that one is a 2D qt and the other something else. Looks like we both have different views on what a waifu is, however >Waifuism exists thanks to Anime, if it hadn't been invented you may have struggled, but you will have settled for 3D in the end this statement is just presumptuous. It may be true for you but don't assume the same for others. Yes, a lot of people still end up with 3DPD despite claiming 2D is better in the past but I'd argue that that couldn't have been true love and they were either just lying to themselves or trying to fit in which is pretty ridiculous since "waifuists" don't seem like a prestigious group to me. I'm not arguing that people would have fallen in love with something else non-existent but I also don't believe that they would have just settled for 3DPD, if they hadn't met their waifu. Also don't you think that there are people who'd rather stay alone than settle with 3D? Dying without having had a meaningful relationship is not common (most likely because it goes against our structure) but it happens.
>>20692 >Those are not waifus they are platonic love For the sake of discussion, what would you say makes waifuism not being platonic love towards an inanimate creation? Isn't a character in a story equal in footing or does it not count because it's not anime? I tend to keep my appreciation and relationship to myself, but every now and then I read about waifuism trying to get some inspiration to create fanart or such, and I often encounter people who seem devoted yet to creations that are not from anime, like cartoons, animated movies, toys with no animated background, comic books, manga, videogames and even obscure things like newspaper cartoon's characters or even mascots form commercials or products.
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