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20667 No. 20667 [Edit]
Yes, the hot and reactive topic that makes everyone with a waifu angry.

I want to ask this question: Why is using a waifu as a coping mechanism considered wrong? Specifically, why do people with a waifu get angry when someone else uses that as a mechanism to cope? This applies to OC waifus and choosing a waifu.

I am not trying to say that getting mad about it is wrong but instead that maybe it isn't necessary.
If a person uses this to cope, is it even working? You can tell them that what they are doing is wrong but do they care when their attempt to cope does nothing good for them?

Some would call it "licking their own wounds". Is that truly so bad? Plenty of people have all kinds of pain, is there something so wrong with people trying to simply deal with whatever plagues them so they can simply live normally? Especially since they probably don't even tell anyone.

I do understand that it shouldn't be practiced, I just ask why people get mad about it.

Let's try and not de-rail this thread into mindless anger and fury, let's please keep some civil discussion that is on-topic.

Thank you for reading this and for your responses.
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>> No. 20668 [Edit]
I think that people with a waifu only have problems with other people if they are not taking it seriously. I don't think they'd be angry at someone who got into "waifuism" because of some personal issue as long as he doesn't reduce her to that.
If he only uses his waifu as a coping mechanism (in other words if he didn't really fall in love with her) and drops her as soon as the personal issue is resolved (since he doesn't need to cope anymore), the people with waifus are justified to get angry.
Unless he wasn't vocal about having a waifu, of course, but I'm pretty sure we're only talking about the people participating in the community as a "waifufag" or otherwise being vocal about it on the internet and thus leading to the topic waifu not be taken seriously.

>and choosing a waifu
People could get angry about that one. People thinking you can choose a waifu are part of the reason why waifus aren't taken seriously.
>> No. 20669 [Edit]
At the risk of incurring a lot of anger, I don't mind any of those things.
I used to care deeply about the spoken and unspoken "rules" of waifus and loving fictional characters, and judged others based on how they followed them, but lately I just don't care about that anymore. If it's better for them to use it to cope, then they should do what helps. Maybe I just got tired of judging others. I'd rather focus on our commonalities than throw a fit over our differences.
>> No. 20670 [Edit]
I believe the anger you talk so much about has to some do with the fact that, due to using them as a coping mechanism, a waifu is seen as "taking what they can get", seen (by the person coping) as a second or inferior choice, as opposed to actually facing their issues and fixing them. In your post you mention coping a lot. Coping from what, exactly?

Post edited on 12th Oct 2017, 10:29pm
>> No. 20680 [Edit]
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And another question. If choosing or creating a waifu is considered wrong why is Pygmalion used so much as an example of love for fictional characters when he broke one of the main rules of waifus? "Consciously choosing or creating a waifu is not allowed."

Sorry if I got something wrong but this is something I have thought about for a while.
>> No. 20681 [Edit]
If you think about it separately it makes sense. Whether you create or make up a character doesn't nessesarily mean you'll fall in love with them. It can happen though sure, and it has.
>> No. 20682 [Edit]
You really don't seem to get it. There's a reason why I only quoted the "and choosing a waifu" part and not the OC one.

There's no rule of "Consciously choosing or creating a waifu is not allowed." Waifufags are no legislature, they can't come up with rules others have to follow or can break. But you shouldn't be surprised when you see them looking down upon people who do consciously choose or create a waifu. Just look at the people who say they chose their waifu, the majority of them just use the term as a synonym for favourite character and they change their waifu regularly which leads to other people thinking that that's what having a waifu amounts to and so not really taking waifufags seriously or being surprised when they read about them really loving the ficitional character.

Pygmalion didn't consciously create his waifu. He created something ideal, then fell in love with it. Falling in love with his OC seems genuine, however creating something perfect with the goal of it being his waifu does not. Choosing a waifu is deciding to fall in love with something. Which I think almost never ends in true love (I don't deny that it can but in the beginning it definitely is only lying to oneself).
I'm pretty sure even normal people don't think that love is something you can artificially evoke.
>> No. 20683 [Edit]
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Ah, that makes sense. Thank you, I've had that question for a while now.

Thank you all for your answers, I learned from this thread and I'm glad.
>> No. 20684 [Edit]
>There's no rule of "Consciously choosing or creating a waifu is not allowed." Waifufags are no legislature, they can't come up with rules others have to follow or can break
I think I expressed myself pretty shitty at that part. What I meant is that they haven't really created a community with their own rules and you can join them if you follow those rules or something like that (of course smaller communities exist but I wouldn't take those as a general standard)
In my eyes it's just people who made a similar experience, there are no rules. You can't 'join' them, you just are one of them the moment you fall in love with a fictional character. Since that experience is a completely personal one, there are no rights and wrongs as long as your feelings are genuine.

I reacted a bit badly to your mention of rules. Sorry for that.

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