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18212 No. 18212 [Edit]
I was looking for new pictures of my waifu when I stumbled upon a doujinshi of her; a terrible one of her being gang raped... Yet I couldn't help but read through it, even if it was like a terrible train wreck... I... I am ashamed to say I found it slightly titillating. I feel as if I want to choke, writing out all this. I can't get that memory out of my head. What is wrong with me?
>> No. 18213 [Edit]
Depends, you could just be horny. Do you usually read doujins like that? I don't know if this is worse, or better, but when I read my waifu's doujins like that, I have a complete disconnect and only focus on her body. Vanilla stuff is different, obviously, but once the tags start to stray from that, I drop the emotional aspect completely, and I'm pretty sure it's a subconscious thing.
>> No. 18214 [Edit]
>What is wrong with me?
Either your love for her is based only on her body or you're becoming a literal cuck.
>> No. 18215 [Edit]
It doesn't have to be one or the other, you know.
>> No. 18216 [Edit]
> What's wrong with me?
Most likely, nothing.

Look at it this way: you would never do anything to hurt her, right? You would never subject her to any of the stuff depicted, I'm guessing, you merely had your interest piqued (to put it mildly); everyone has dark fantasies at least once in their lives, and as long as we don't act on them and they don't happen too often, there's no foul, I think...

(For what it's worth, my beloved once asked me if I could grow myself some tentacles the next time we had a daydream-date, so it isn't just us. Maybe try asking her about some of the less creepy elements; you might find you both want to experiment a little...)
>> No. 18220 [Edit]
Its normal to have a physical reaction to seeing body parts of people in sexual situations, even if you don't actually like what you see.
>> No. 18236 [Edit]
Based on past threads, this is a pretty common problem we run into.

I know with me, I have the compulsion to look at every single fanwork of my waifu... I don't really know why, I just do. I sometimes get aroused looking at things I hate as well - usually I'm disgusted at the same time, but it can't be helped. Just know that the doujin wasn't "real" in any meaningful sense and and that your body had a natural reaction to seeing porn.
>> No. 18292 [Edit]
I've gotten hard and fapped to some absolutely disgusting stuff. Doujinshi and pornography are specifically designed to arouse you. There's doujins of my waifu where she's mindbroken/gangbanged, and despite how much I hate that they exist, they still get me heated up. On the other side of the spectrum, there's a doujin where she's brutally raped as an afterthought in two or three pages near the middle. I had no idea it was coming, and I was so depressed and disgusted after seeing it that I threw up.

Long story short, there's nothing wrong with getting horny from reading porno comics without any emotional stuff. There's a reason why seeing her in some doujins arouses me, and why I want to kill myself when I think of the one I just mentioned.
>> No. 18327 [Edit]
As long as you didn't fap to it I guess it's alright. People can't choose what they're aroused by, though in future perhaps don't look past the first page.
>> No. 18336 [Edit]
you don't deserve her and you don't even begin to comprehend what having a waifu actually means if you come here asking such stupid questions. l really hope that this is a low quality bait.
>> No. 18339 [Edit]
>if you get an erection from porn you don't really have a waifu
Really, guy?
>> No. 18341 [Edit]
This is both, pretty wrong but also understandable.

Im in the same boat as OP, there are a few doujins about my waifu and I always liked the artist before he made the doujins (he made two doujins with her). He is one of the artists who make doujins that really hit the spot for me in terms of artstyle and themes and I wasnt exactly happy when I first saw an upload from him with my waifu as the "actress". But well, curiosity got the overhand and after that I was in the situation OP is in.

Hate me all you want, but I like both of them. I dont want to go into detail about what they are, but luckily it isnt anything extreme. It does contain rape though. I learned to separate this, I can guarantee you I would NEVER, EVER let this happen in real life to her (or however you would call it). I would go berserk on anyone who would even think about touching her against her will. Sure, there is still some kind of hypocrisy in it, but personally I wouldnt mind her being aroused about pictures of me in this kind of situations as well. It just isnt real (like 2d in 2d) and is sololy there for your own entertainment. We even joke about it and I like to imagine her making fun of me for my preferences. I still try to avoid looking at doujins about her though. Mainly because I dont like that there are other people who see her in that embarrassing situations.
>> No. 18397 [Edit]
A little off-topic, but since I've gone on here, I've been much more sensitive to the fact that people care for the characters in r34 and doujins. I used to enjoy hentai and stuff without guilt, but now when I see popular female characters in doujins (especially characters that people post about on here) all I can think is, "That's horrible, how could they do that? That's someone's waifu". Anyone else think similarly?
>> No. 18398 [Edit]
Not in general, but it does feel weird when I see a doujin with a character I know is someone's waifu/husbando. To the point I just stop and put it aside.
>> No. 18441 [Edit]
Yeah, same. I actually got rid of some physical doujins I owned after meeting someone who's waifu was the girl in them.
>> No. 18443 [Edit]
No, anon - you are the bait.
>> No. 18643 [Edit]
I'm glad I found this thread; I wouldn't have wanted to make a new one.

I've been with my waifu for a long time now, and I've always had a problem with this. The idea of anything bad happening to her makes me sick, but for some reason every time I see a new doujin with that sort of content (gangbangs, bukkake, mindbreak, etc.) I end up pleasuring myself to it multiple times in a row before feeling disgusted with myself for the next few days. What the fuck is wrong with me? How do I stop this? I feel so awful that I am aroused by it. What should I do?
>> No. 18647 [Edit]
Are these with your waifu or just some random characters?
>> No. 18649 [Edit]
My waifu. I'm honestly considering removing my access to the internet just so that there's no chance of it happening anymore. It's not often, maybe every 3 weeks at the least, but it makes me feel like the worst person in existence.
>> No. 18650 [Edit]
>>it makes me feel like the worst person in existence.

You are. Why would you consciously try to search for such stuff?

I mean, I am not a saint - I had some serious porn problems in the past, and even had some slippages in the present. But it never ever involved my waifu or any character I care about.
>> No. 18651 [Edit]
I don't actively search it, but when I try to search for new images of her I end up turning off the R18 filter and one thing leads to another.

I think I'm just going to try and keep myself from masturbating and block those sites.
>> No. 18652 [Edit]
I know that kind of problem - had to deal with it in the past.
Each time you're tempted to turn off the filter or search for porn stuff of your waifu, you should think about what you're doing. It's not really easy because your mind is mostly focused on what you're gonna search (well, that was my case at least), but that's the best solution.

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