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17689 No. 17689 [Edit]
How do you get better after years of being a pure hikikomori?

Everything is so terrifying. I've gotten myself to the point where I can go grocery shopping when I have to and make phone calls (although I hate it and it still makes me anxious), but I cannot understand how I can become okay with anything else without taking years and having a lot of support - which I don't have, not even family.

The idea of trying to rent an apartment on my own and seeing a real estate agent without somebody else present is terrifying. I can't handle the idea of a job interview, and even a one day a week job seems horrific and completely out of my grasp. Besides that, I can't imagine why anybody would employ me to begin with, even with the lowest tier of jobs - I can't drive, I have no experience, I'm awkward, unintelligent and have zero skills.

What do people do when they no longer can sustain this life, but are in this state? Do they all just die, or is there hope? Has anyone here spent years (not months) without leaving the house and then gotten better to the point they can work and managed to find an apartment of their own?
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>> No. 17690 [Edit]
There are two keys: baby steps and positivity.

Don't try to tackle everything at once. Try something that makes you a little uncomfortable, and when you get used to that, move on to something bigger. That's what they do when someone is afraid of something. For spiders, deal with having a spider in a cage being in the same room as the person, then have the cage within a foot of them, and so on. Take it slow.

Being positive is huge. Telling yourself that you cannot do something is a sure way to make you unable to ever do it. Instead, try to tell yourself that getting a part-time job isn't that bad, that it's even easy. Don't automatically assume that it will be hard, even if that's your first instinct. Tell yourself that there are things you can do, even if you are a loser. Even losers can do some things.

That said, it's still very hard to convince yourself that you're not a worthless piece of shit. So . . . good luck?
>> No. 17692 [Edit]
My input would be to rent a place after you're more or less "comfortable" doing everything you should be doing when living by yourself, before living by yourself. That is working at a job, follow the activity rythme of society (normal sleep rythme), feeding yourself independently, etc. My rationale here is to create an insurance or a safety net. If you crash into a problem you didn't see coming, related to living alone or otherwise, then you'd at least know how to function on a practical level while you're figuring things out. Argument being that you'd be safer from burning from the crash by spiralling into deep depression/anxiety or the like.

That's basically what >>17690, just a bit more practical maybe. I mean, you have motivation for change, you know what needs to happen by means of reason, and you're intelligent enough to get your message across no problem - I think there's hope.
>> No. 17694 [Edit]
I wish I could do that, but I don't have a stable situation. I've been living with a relative who is moving within two months, and by that time I need to have my own place and some sort of income to support me living alone and for food. I don't have any other family to turn to.

I think it'd be a lot easier if I just knew things would be stable and didn't have what feels like a very short time limit.
>> No. 17697 [Edit]
That sucks. I guess you'll just have to take the plunge and hope you float. Can't really say anything about probability, you might have hidden strengths, who knows.
>> No. 17701 [Edit]
Sorry. For some of us it's too late to change our hikikomori ways. Mooch off the system for as long as it exists, then hope you saved up some gold/food/bullets for the inevitable collapse.
>> No. 17703 [Edit]
speaking of gold I think somewhere lying around is a gold chain I used to have. It's a thin one with a tiny cross on it I had ever since I was very little that my parents made me wear sometimes for whatever reason. Don't wanna ask where it is though, just wanna steal it and sell it since it is real gold. How much would an average smaller gold chain like that get me in general? It's in very good condition most likely.
>> No. 17704 [Edit]
I have been a shut-in since the age of 13. I'm 21 now. I leave my house only a few times a year, usually every 4 months or so. I haven't gotten better, nor do I really want to. Why would you want to?
>> No. 17707 [Edit]
I can't really speak for anyone else here, but I'd want to get better for the sake of freedom.

It really sucks having to rely on your parents for everything at such an age, and I'm only getting older.

I cannot get on NEETbux and I really can't stand the feeling of guilt I get every time I leave my room.
>> No. 17708 [Edit]
Because I have to, in two months I'll have nowhere to live. I've also spent the same amount of time this way so it seems impossible.
>> No. 17730 [Edit]
Gold is selling for very cheap. You won't get anything off of it, considering it's a thin chain.

Can you take over the lease so that you don't have to search for a new place?
>> No. 17739 [Edit]
No, it was a rental and there is no way I can afford to pay the rent.

Autismbux doesn't cover the cost of living if you're alone and even if I could cope with housemates, I don't think anybody would want to live with me.
>> No. 17768 [Edit]
Well its been about a year now since I've had a stable job with varying hours 20-60 hour weeks depending on week. I'm a high school drop out, no friends past net and yeah all the same shit you've read a thousands times

I'm still socially retarded and I don't leave the house often outside work, but its proof that as long as you can physically work and not mess up to much you can still make some money.

Now I'm at the really hard part, trying to find a drive to live A fictional character isn't good enough drive for me anymore.
>> No. 17769 [Edit]
This may come out as harsh, but I'd say comfort in 2d love only stretch so far. At some point you're gonna need something more substantial to hold onto - figuratively speaking. Unless you're a bleckbelt escapist ninja master or something, then you're set for life I guess.
>> No. 17799 [Edit]
Pretty much, I was probably more hardcore about it all then most, but at the end of the day even with as much imagination and memory I can only play out the few possible scenarios so many times in my head. She can't respond to my questions, she can't give me advice, she can't do anything thats not already in my mind.

And frankly talking only to yourself for so long does far more damage then it does good. You can lie and tell yourself its okay to be completely alone but it really isn't, at least if you want your sanity intact
>> No. 17854 [Edit]
As a skeptic who isn't wealthy, I doubt we'll live to see the age of mass-produced affordable robot companions either.
>> No. 17855 [Edit]
That's my understanding of it as well. It would be a miracle if we see them hit the market in the next 10 years for less than $30,000. As is a none robotic life like doll would cost you in the ballpark of $8,000, and a whole lot more for a custom one.
>> No. 17878 [Edit]
>As of March 2014, according to Popular Mechanics, the Honda Asimo costs just under $1 million to purchase. Rental fees for the humanoid robot are around $100,000.
and that's just for a glorified life size toy that can't even climb stairs.
>> No. 17882 [Edit]
>> No. 17955 [Edit]
It falling over was hilarious to see. Don't forget life cycle costs - namely maintenance and repair fees which could be quite a bit. Paying out the nose for firmware to make sure your robowaifu doesn't crash or murder you can't be helped.

Don't forget the government's hand in all this too. Wouldn't be surprised to see them attach a 'special' levy (like gas, alcohol, smokes etc.) on top of regular sales tax for it. Add in customs (import) fees, licensing/registration fees and required insurance fees (like car insurance to hold you responsible as the owner for the actions of something so intelligent and potentially destructive)...

The bill just gets bigger and bigger.

Post edited on 8th Jul 2014, 3:50pm
>> No. 17956 [Edit]
>Don't forget the government's hand in all this too.
I half expect feminists and conservatives to throw a massive fit about it and convince people with power that robowaifus could result in population problems and be generally bad for society and get them outlawed or only legal to be sold to the handicapped with a doctor's consent.
>> No. 17959 [Edit]
So you would have to bribe doctor and case workers. Throw in paying for some lawyers and politicians for good measure. That just sounds like an even bigger bill.
>> No. 17973 [Edit]
Maybe the robowaifus could autoevolve into a superior species then. Would you guys be okay with that?
>> No. 17980 [Edit]
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As long as they aren't all feminazi cunts. Moe Sapiens inheriting the Earth is totally OK by me. Cute is justice. Kill us all by giving us heart attacks due to it.
>> No. 18020 [Edit]
lol population control

Already more then enough people shitting out kids they can't take care of. Focus on them and let the solo people help advance society with their free time
>> No. 18022 [Edit]
The birth control is that you're a misogynist if you marry a white, christian, upper middle class male, or give birth to boy.
>> No. 18025 [Edit]
I think most governments want more citizens not less. more tax money and workers to replace the retired. With the exception of undeniably over populated nations such as china I don't think any country would really want to implement any population control measures.

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