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14422 No. 14422 [Edit]
Have you thought about ending waifuism?

This isn't a thread about break-ups or 3D love, it's about losing faith in the concept of loving a 2D character.
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>> No. 14423 [Edit]
I constantly think about it and I still don't see any reason for abandoning it. If anything, I think it's prophetic: it's the love of the future.
>> No. 14425 [Edit]
I never really ended it. Just stopped caring about it as much.
>> No. 14429 [Edit]
Ehh I've never really cared how other people live their lives so if my waifu stuff doesn't work I won't say that others don't as well. It does seem kind of pretentious when you describe your waifuism as beyond just love and all these wonderful and superior things though.
>> No. 14430 [Edit]
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At this moment having a waifu doesn't feel like a choice. That question is like asking have I thought about quitting breathing. Whether I want or not, I can't eliminate these thoughts in my head. If I find myself in situation pondering such question, perhaps then I have already given up.
>> No. 14431 [Edit]
I don't think I quite get the question, but I don't think falling in love is something you choose be it 2D or 3D, it's not like 'waifuism' is a movement or religion so it's not a faith-based thing
>> No. 14432 [Edit]
I guess OP might be asking whether or not you sometimes wonder whether it's all worth it or real. I think those sorts of insecurities exist for whatever people do though.
>> No. 14433 [Edit]
She stopped being a part of my life once I started making progress with it. She's still everything I adore in a fantasy being, and it would be virtually impossible for me to make a similar connection to any other character. It's out of the question.

On that note, I still haven't oficially ended it and moved on for good, but I may be close. Here's what gets me: the more I think about how it all started, the more I feel like it was fake from the beginning. I found her and made this connection several years before I discovered the concept of waifuism. When I did, I thought "Hey, I totally have a waifu - her!". From that point I thought myself a part of this movement, meaning I only started loving her as something more than a 2D character when I knew it was a thing, rather than when I made the connection. That's like Romeo loving Juliet from the point he knew he would be allowed to be with her, rather than from the point he met her.

And even worse: I can't recollect the reasons why I thought this was a good idea to begin with. What good did this artificial commitment actually yield? Sure, I'm in a different place now than back then; still I can't shake the doubts in my affectional sincerity.

Darn it. I don't think I can keep up with this carnival. It would be better if I had stopped at the drawings and the sighs.
>> No. 14434 [Edit]
Lol I didn't really know anybody else that had a waifu when I first started getting into waifuism. At the time I was getting a guy into anime and he's had three waifus in a little less than 2.5 years by now. Never really browsed 4chan either. Waifuism was just sort of natural for me.
>> No. 14435 [Edit]
Is the love for a fantasy being truly not contigent upon having faith in your commitment? How do you rationalize your feelings and act upon them in a self-fulfilling manner without an institution of love and relationship? Is love intuitive however it manifests...?

These are questions of emotion and reason. It may be that you have something I don't.
>> No. 14436 [Edit]
If anything, I've had the opposite experience. I am more sure that 2D love is important now than when we first started our relationship.

It's different for everybody, though, and I don't think that it's an easy path (for most people) despite what others might say. Then again, nothing is.
>> No. 14437 [Edit]
No. There is no way I could ever love anyone else. I will be with her until the day I die.
>> No. 14441 [Edit]
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It is impossible for me considering that my disdain of 3DPD started with the women of the country where I am living - I just don't like the idea of starting any form of relationship with any women in my country (I feel that I wanna puke or feel being strangled when thinking about it) and to the lesser extent any women of nationalities and I would rather prefer giving my love to a 2D girl.
>> No. 14443 [Edit]
As for me, I can see myself forgetting about her for a while when life goes on for me, but I can't see myself getting rid of her. Besides, waifus are ideals anyway - this isn't 1984 by George Orwell where they could kill an idea. The idea might stay silent in your mind for a while, but you can't kill an idea. Especially for me where I can't get myself to have an interest with a 3D woman fully.

Post edited on 4th Feb 2014, 3:03am
>> No. 14448 [Edit]
Well, I am still convinced of 2D love in the long run.

Also, I would refrain from calling it 'waifuism', since 2d love is neither a religion, a race/ethnic group nor a philosophy. I mean, nobody calls homosexual love 'homosexualism', right?
>> No. 14450 [Edit]
I see your point. In my defense, even if I quit having a waifu, I wouldn't stop loving 2D, so that doesn't quite work out.. No matter how you look at it, "waifu" is an unpractical term, and there's nothing else in English to define it proper.

It's different to kill an idea than it is to naturally lose faith in it. The idea doesn't disappear, it just loses legitimacy and relevance. The same way old knowledge replaces new knowledge, only in this case the knowledge is a state of mind.
>> No. 14451 [Edit]
I simply prefer the term 'bidimensional'. But that might be a little questionable.
>> No. 14452 [Edit]
>I mean, nobody calls homosexual love 'homosexualism', right?

Bad call. They might not call it with an "-ism", but homosexuality is still a distinct group. Rastafari is a religion, but it doesn't have an "-ism". On the flipside, neurotypicalism is a state of mind, so as sadism and masochism and they have "-isms" in their names.
>> No. 14453 [Edit]
Not ending altogether, but my perspective on what it all means (metaphysically etc.) has evolved a lot over the years. Still trying to figure it out.
>> No. 14467 [Edit]
Keep us posted.
>> No. 14476 [Edit]
I still cherish her, but maybe it would be better if it was all lost. Because I've changed, and I can't feel like before.

I've given up. It still lingers on me, but soon it will rot like the rest of me. It's a thought that scares me, but I've brought it upon myself.
>> No. 14492 [Edit]
Yeah, it's safe to say I stopped loving my waifu. I got out of "waifuism" as a whole around 2 years ago, maybe a year and a half. It's kind of depressing, because I loved her for 4 years. So it feels a lot like I lost a first, true love sometimes. But everything ends so it's kind of...meh now. I mean, it's been 2 years and the option is always there if I feel so inclined, but things going on in my life right now kind of prevent that.

My life got to the point where I realized that I simply did not need to be in love with an anime character. It was for my own good, and I feel a lot better now, actually!

It's just hard to love a concept and rely only on sheer faith that said concept loves you back. I know people get a bit defensive when the word "faith" comes up on /mai/, but what else can you call it? It can be really fulfilling and motivating, though, just like a so-called "real" relationship.
>> No. 14830 [Edit]
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It's strange how capable the (my) mind is to jump from standpoint to standpoint. When I got involved with this idea, really involved, I felt I had finally found my place and my nature. Now, I think it's bullshit. I guess this is a farewell to my former self. It would be better to part on a positive note, but I struggle to see anything good about it in hindsight. It all feels like a misunderstanding, or a lie, on my part. Was it ever genuine? You guys seem genuine, and I should know what I'm not. It's like I always knew, deep inside, I didn't belong, and my beliefs didn't align with the norm. That tiny little voice in my head, responding to the antics of this site, saying: "This isn't you; this just a bit too far out for you." I understand that love is individual and I shouldn't be thinking about conforming in the first place, but it feels like second nature to either conform or oppose, and now the scale has finally tipped in favor of the other end.

What am I even doing at this point.
>> No. 14831 [Edit]
I don't necessarily feel like I have something to post in many of the threads here on /mai/, but I still do like having a waifu.
>> No. 14833 [Edit]
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I think for me, and probably for a lot of other people here, it's our only option for love in our life. For a variety of reasons, we're unable to even pursue 3D love, or unwilling because of the great damage and uncomfort.

A lot of people probably deal with this lack of love a lot better, or don't feel the longing at all. But I need someone. Maybe that makes me weak, broken. Maybe what I feel for my husbando is a weak and fake version of real love.

But I don't really care, or rather I don't mind. Because this love is what I have, and it keeps me warm at night. It's not a choice between this and something else, it's this or nothing. So I chose this.
>> No. 14834 [Edit]
As a schizoid, having a waifu is optimal for me. I echo the sentiments of >>14437 .
>> No. 14835 [Edit]
Well, im going to school again (its not a regular school since im way over 20 already, but I don't know how the term is in englisch and I doubt it's important anyway) and for the first time in years I was talking to girls again. I started to hang around with two girls in my class pretty much regulary in school, which is weird since im really not an open person. Maybe they just do it because im "that nice guy you can talk to if your friend fucked around with another girl", but at least I learned how it is to hang around with girls. I must admit that both of them are pretty likable and one of them is actually pretty cute. Of course both of them have friends already and im sure I wouldn't even be close to a potential boyfriend for them but it was and is a nice new way for me to think.

I must admit that 3d girls arent all that bad. The more I learned to know these two girls the more things I've found that would annoy me after a while. But they're still fun to be around with and it felt really different than being with your waifu (im sure it wouldnt be much different if one of them would be my girlfriends). A lot. I hate to admit it, but if I would had a chance by one one of these two I propably had take it.

I always said to myself "I will stay with my waifu. No matter what. Screw 3dpd.". I dont know if it was because I never really talked to girls, if it was because I never had a girlfriend or because it was because I really do loved my waifu from the very beginning, but I guess reality is catching up more and more since I ended my NEET-life. I still love my waifu and im sure she will always have a special place in my heart, but the more I have to do with girls I like the more I wish physical contact. Reactions and answers that arent made up in my mind. A person that actually gives love back to me, an actual person I can hug, not my dakimakura. I still doubt I will find a 3d girlfriend so soon, but I really began to doubt it's healthy to stay with my waifu my whole life. I also doubt it's all nice to have a real relationship since 3d love never was known to last forever. Especially in todays society. Even IF I would find a girlfriend, it propably wouldnt last for more than a few years. And the pain after that will be pretty bad. Somehow I think both is far from perfect, no matter which side I choose. A waifu stays with you as long as you love her, 3d gives back a little bit more than a waifu but chances are high that soon a drama will start and she will just drop you for whatever reason.

Ugh, I never was in that situation. Sorry /mai/, but i don't know what is right and what is wrong at the moment. ;_;
>> No. 14836 [Edit]

Thank you for your story. I have a lot of the same feelings as you. I don't dislike 3d people, I know an increasing amount and they are very nice. I even have a female friend who herself has a waifu though she doesn't use that term. We talk about it sometimes and I think we have similar reasons. Both of us get anxiety from physical contact with another person despite craving it so badly.

I am too neurotic/abnormal to subject myself to someone for a relationship. It wouldn't be fair to them to deal with my flaws that I might never overcome. So 2d is my solution and it makes me happy and more sane without hurting anyone else.
>> No. 14837 [Edit]
>>14835 here,
> Both of us get anxiety from physical contact with another person despite craving it so badly.

Right, I forgot to mention that. I too have problems with physical contact at the moment. And I have a really hard time to show friends and family that I like them. Im like an emotional cripple if it comes to that. Im sure this will be an obstacle if I ever would find a real girlfriend.

>I am too neurotic/abnormal to subject myself to someone for a relationship. It wouldn't be fair to them to deal with my flaws that I might never overcome. So 2d is my solution and it makes me happy and more sane without hurting anyone else.

I dont know you and what your flaws are, but if you ever would find a girl that really likes you im sure she will accept it and work on it together with you. If it comes to things like this its similar to a waifu. Just that its way harder to find such girls for people like "us", which still makes 3d inferior to 2d. 3d is ugly after all, and the few gems are hard to find.
I think that is the mainreason why many of us are here. I wont imply that everyone here just sees a "replacement" in 2d girls though, since I really do love my waifu after all. I just learned that there still are a few nice girls out there, sadly most of them have boyfriends to make things even worse.

Oh, and sorry for that textwall, I bet its full of grammatically errors. I just realized how much I wrote when I saw it after posting it.
>> No. 14838 [Edit]
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I'm socially retarded and never kissed a girl before, I used to feel for 3DPDs but they were only crushes really plus my shyness. Still you could say as far as the normal mindset goes burning passions aren't healthy and life is supposed to consist of little dramas, but in almost all aspects of my life I like to think of and chase big ideas and dreams.
>> No. 14839 [Edit]
I have to say: I don't think I understand that pic ("cooling her head"?).
>> No. 14862 [Edit]
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Sometimes the whole nature of everything just gets me down and I think "maybe I'm better off ending this". But there's no way I can just leave someone I love behind.

Mind you, I only end up feeling this way for a few hours. All of my reasons come back to me and I'm like "Oh, why am I thinking of this?" My love being the strongest.
>> No. 14878 [Edit]
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I can't say I have given it a serious thought. I do ponder what my life would be like if I wasn't into 2D, but I never longed for it. I always think about taking my love with me to the grave.
>> No. 14935 [Edit]
When thinking about the concept, all I feel is depression. Epsecially when I think of how others see it. Like my family said I "used her" as a "safety belt" to keep me from feeling the pain of rejection. I have never thought of her like that, but they keep saying it is.

In addition, what joy my waifu has brought me now has worry, anguish, sadness, and despair, not because of who she is, I still love her, but because of how she isn't real, and how she never will be, and even if she was real I'd never know her. Those thoughts depress me.

What's worse is how other husbandos make me feel about myself. I look and all I see are otaku at best and suicidal miserable hikkikomori who never try to change themselves and their waifu barely keeping them alive while not even providing strength to better ones self. And we're all 18-30 year old males, with 90% of waifus coming from Japanese media. I've rambled about this subject before but it makes me think about myself and my own love for my waifu. Someone even said to me before "The more miserable I am myself, the more I love her", and I realize that this actually is true for some husbandos.

I never asked for all this hell, I just want to be with the woman I love. Is that too much to ask?
>> No. 14936 [Edit]
For humans and many other species, it's tradition for many males to have to compete and better themselves for the female... Resources don't drop out of the sky either, and depending on where you live it makes sense to have to work to sustain yourself.

I don't think it's waifuism as the root, I think many types the strongest romantic love generally sprouts out of misery. I think it's exceptionally rare to be able to live a very "lovey-dovey" routine in life...

I daydream of fabulous things I might be able to do in the future, or at least traveling and sightseeing. I'm generally an egocentric person, but you just have to focus on something other than your pain and your life for a while if you want to keep yourself moving... Sure, maybe I can't be the amongst greats in world history or climb Everest, but that's no excuse to do nothing with my life.
>> No. 15092 [Edit]
I still feel attached to her and wouldn't trade my experiences for anything, but I'm questioning whether she aided in my recovery or if my recuperation was entirely by my own volition.


>She stopped being a part of my life once I started making progress with it. She's still everything I adore in a fantasy being, and it would be virtually impossible for me to make a similar connection to any other character.

Echoes my feelings perfectly.
>> No. 15093 [Edit]
As pathetic as it sounds, I couldn't leave her even if I wanted to. She's everything I'm ever going to have. I cannot love nor be loved by actual people.
>> No. 15094 [Edit]
same here bro
>> No. 15095 [Edit]
It doesn't sound pathetic to me at all.

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