Wow, OP, i so know that feel. Im in the exact same position as you are. I loved her, i love her and i will lover her in the future, but im afraid that all what you said is true. Th elast few months it just was painfull to be with her. Im holding on her full aware that i never will be with her, still loving her even if i wont get anything back in return. I dont even want something in return, but it hurts to know that i will never be able to say her how much i love her.

Sure, there are many, MANY threads about this and most people here have different views about this kind of relationship, how it works for them and are perfectly ok about it. Sadly im in a state where i really would wish to hold her in my arms, speak to her and get something in return. Its just as you said, no matter how much it hurts, we will still love her, as weird as it sounds. And i too dont know how i should handle it. I cant and wont break up with her. I even made a thread here about taking a break for a while, but it doesnt help much.

I really cant help you in your situation, but i wanted you to know that youre not alone. And sorry for my english, its not my first language and the more i write the more messed up it sounds im afraid.

>>13529
>Sadly im in a state where i really would wish to hold her in my arms, speak to her and get something in return.
I'm just curious, but why don't you interact with her by using your imagination? Talk to her and imagine what she would say in response to you, or give her a hug using a pillow or something similar, and imagine being hugged in return, things like that. This is what I've always done and I've always found it satisfying. Perhaps things like that just don't cut it?

I can't relate to being this way because of your waifu, but I'm sorry you feel this way. While I've not been in the exact situation, I remember feeling this way years before I had a waifu. I had to take medication to get better but I know that's not an option for everyone, nor what everybody wants. Regardless, I can't promise things get better but I hope no matter what you choose to do going forward, it makes you happy, or at least gives you peace.

That said...
>There are more NEET and Hikis here than there are successful people,
That's because that's what this board is for. Other people shouldn't post or if they do they shouldn't draw attention to the fact that they aren't NEET or hikki. Are NEETs and hikkis more likely to have a waifu than Ford Drivers? Very likely. But since they aren't allowed here and I don't like going to other websites on this topic because others don't get it like /tc/ does, I can't know for sure.

There's some more in this I could reply to in more depth, like how waifu relationships are destined to stagnate (I disagree with this), but a lot of what I'd say has already been said before (some in archived threads) so I don't know if you want to hear it, and this is a personal thread too so I'll respect your wishes if you don't want me to comment further.

Sorry for reposting, messed up posting the first time.

>>13530
>This is what I've always done and I've always found it satisfying. Perhaps things like that just don't cut it?

I dont want to derail OPs thread for my own problems, but to answer it: yeah. Im with her for almost 5 years now and the more our "relationship" advance the more it bugs me that i wont ever hold her in my arms, feeling her wamth, her breath and everything that comes with a hug. Imagination is nice, yeah, but well... I wont go further with it and drag others with me down. OP pretty much sums everything up what i think anyway. Damn is this thread depressing. On top of that the two best and most romantic seasons are coming, i hope i get a hold of myself and can enjoy it this year again with her.

>>13530
this guy here answered it for me >>13533


and even then, imagination just stops feeling right at a certainpoint

>>13532
Oh no, Yunocchi is not my waifu. She's just the image most related to what I'm currently feeling.

I feel like that is a question that should be asked. Why are the main people to take waifus seriously NEET/Hikki? Why do Ford Drivers vastly prefer 3D? Why do they seem to be happier with life? I feel like there has to be some sort of reason for this.

You can go ahead and explain on, in regards to stagnation and whatnot, but it's like once her story ends there's no future. As far as we know, she is the same age every single year. She doesn't change as a person afterwords or even does anything any more. She only exists in her moment's time. I don't think waifuism was designed to last because of it, especially when the term for it (not the act of it) started out as a joke.

>>13554
>She doesn't change as a person
Indeed. That's her main virtue: she's the object of love (the very thing that awakens love) crystallized in time. She's undying and honest love. What you seem to long for is the normal, pedestrian and deceiving version of love, in which people mistakes their beloved (truly a character in their heads) with some person out there who, of course, does not match the idea they fell for, as it eventually becomes obvious through the changes you stubbornly want to experience under some delusion of reciprocity within human relationships.

>She only exists in her moment's time.
No: as a character, she exists for as long as her source does and gets revisited (much longer than any petty human life); as your waifu, which is your own idea of her, she exists for as long as you do. You insufflate her life with your own. You re-inforce her existence and value with your commitment and elaborations on that (well-founded) love of yours.

>I don't think waifuism was designed to last... especially when the term for it (not the act of it) started out as a joke.
Hiki/NEET or not, successful or not in life to any given parameter, I've found that the guys who find fulfilment in sticking to 2D love are the ones who choose to, come what may, taking it as it is and not as a consolation prize while aiming for a normal life of normal love... which is the actual joke.

>>13528
>he said that a waifu should only last so long before the initial flare fades away and the realities of the situation set in and have to be accepted, or it will only get worse. He stated that I was in a parasitic relationship, where I give everything to her and get nothing in return, not even contact from her or something that lets me know she's THERE.
As expected from a Ford Driver. I strongly disagree with this. It should last as long as your love lasts. If your love only lasts a short time, then so be it, but there is no reason to cut it off for a stupid reason like that. The only way you will receive contact from her is if you imagine it so.

>This has all lead to many emotions, mostly negative nowadays, being stemmed from her and my relationship with her. More resent and despise for reality, losing a meaning or purpose in my life, no longer loving what I liked to do.
You're blaming your depression on your waifu, and I don't think it's her fault. I think you're mistaken, and getting confused as to what the source of it is, if there even is a source.

>There are more NEET and Hikis here than there are successful people, which puts a dimmer light on the hopes of waifuism truly helping ones life.
Waifus are not a magical cure-all for your problems, and should not be viewed as such.

>>13554
I agree with >>13557 when he says
>as your waifu, which is your own idea of her, she exists for as long as you do. You insufflate her life with your own. You re-inforce her existence and value with your commitment and elaborations on that (well-founded) love of yours.

As for her changing, I think she changes as much as you want her to. If she continues on in your head canon as going to school after her series ends, for example, then she will be doing such. If she lives with you as your girlfriend, then she does.

>Why are the main people to take waifus seriously NEET/Hikki?
I think people like this are more open minded to such things, and being the type of person to lean towards a NEET/hikki lifestyle they also have a tendency to dislike other humans and find substitutes for their romantic desires. I don't think that most people pick up waifus because they are lonely or because they are isolated, but just because they desire something different. Also, waifus definitely do not cause someone to become a NEET/hikki, so that is out of the question.

>I don't think waifuism was designed to last because of it
It wasn't "designed" for anything. It's not a dogmatic system, since everything is different for everyone. I think a more appropriate and accurate way to say something like this, is that many people aren't designed to handle being in love with a fictional character for extended periods of time.

>especially when the term for it (not the act of it) started out as a joke.
This makes me think more that you view the whole "waifuism" thing as less dynamic than it really is, and that you're treating it like a dogma, which you shouldn't.

>>13557
>That's her main virtue: she's the object of love (the very thing that awakens love) crystallized in time. She's undying and honest love. What you seem to long for is the normal, pedestrian and deceiving version of love, in which people mistakes their beloved (truly a character in their heads) with some person out there who, of course, does not match the idea they fell for, as it eventually becomes obvious through the changes you stubbornly want to experience under some delusion of reciprocity within human relationships.

I love this, very well said.

>>13554
Whoops, I meant I couldn't relate feeling this way BECAUSE of having a waifu, not because of YOUR waifu. Sorry for not making that clear.

>>13557 and >>13558 said most of what I was going to say, however. I'd like to just add that nobody experiences waifu in the same way and that a fair number of us have our waifu change and grow with us to a degree, through our own minds and thinking about her more, re-examining her source material, imagining what sort of future she's going to have (if you're into that), etc. As you grow as a person, so will your understanding of her, and hopefully your love for her as well.

This... might not be a popular opinion on this board but I'll say it anyway: 2D relationships can be destructive, and can hurt you, and be unhealthy. So can any relationship regardless of dimension or romantic status. In any case, reading your post didn't make me think you are in a destructive relationship, more like you were self-destructing yourself and thinking about the relationship/your waifu was making you feel bad. They aren't exactly the same thing. I could be totally wrong on this though and I admit that, but that's what I've gathered from your posting.

I agree with what other posters have said about stopping treating your love of your waifu like a dogma. It is what it is and let it be natural, don't worry about it so much.

I'm not sure if this was helpful at all but I do really hope that you find some answers that satisfy you and peace soon.

Love is just very small part of life. It can be very important, but it shouldn't be one's only card in life. Life is like those Sims games, if single stat falls down enough, no matter how high your other stats are, you'll begin to feel down. So I feel, problems you are having are hardly related to your waifu.

>>13560
>>13562

Both of you say my problems are hardly related to her...but then why doesn't she make me happy? Why doesn't looking at her let me know things are going to be okay? Why won't the longing go away?

Also, what do you mean by a dogma? Sorry to sound stupid

>>13566
>Both of you say my problems are hardly related to her...but then why doesn't she make me happy?

She is not the problem. The problem might be something else. And, given that you quickly blame it all to her, the source of all your problems might be you.

>>13566
>but then why doesn't she make me happy? Why doesn't looking at her let me know things are going to be okay?
It doesn't necessarily work like that unless being in love makes you very very happy. There are plenty of people who are horribly depressed while they are in love. Also, this doesn't mean that she's the source of your problems.

Also, when I say dogma, I mean it feels like you're going through "waifuism" as though it has specific rules and benefits that apply to everyone. Maybe I'm mistaken.

I wish I didn't have this itch or sense of doubt when I think about her. I wish I could understand what I'm feeling in my mind every time she come to mind. A moment of happiness is quickly replaced with a flood of doubt, and it all makes me feel so terrible...I want the light of my life back.

It's been over a month. I'm feeling no better about anything. My longing, my desire to hold her, be with her, hear from her, just to see her again...I can't stand being alive anymore in this world without her. This world where she's never exist by any means. There's no point in living without her, and every passing day the world feels emptier and emptier without her. I need to die. I want to kill myself out of my love for her. Is it love with one person? Isn't love a two-way street? I'm a monster in love with an imaginary girl who doesn't even bring me much happiness anymore. I wish I could die without bringing anyone grief. I wish I was never born. I don't want to live in a world without her anymore. I always wake up in pain, in tears, and I still don't know what to do.

I love her. She means the world to me. However, she is not real, and is inherently empty due to the laws of non-existence. Because she is empty, and she means the world to me, the world is empty. If the world is empty, and I am in the world, I am empty. It's all so empty...why can't I just be with her? I need to die.

>>13672
I think you're blinded with your emotions towards here because it's hard for you (as it is for me) to find a way to escape your thoughts. You've repeatedly said that your relationship with her no longer brings you happiness. You also said that it's not a two-way street with a waifu.

I know this is very anti-/mai/ advice, but try detaching your daily life away from whatever strings you have that attach you with her (pictures for example). You're not hurting anyone by doing that.
You need to push yourself to shift your focus towards something else, something less addictive yet something that interests you.

I'm sure you understand that what you're saying is really serious and I know that you don't want really to go down that path.
You don't "need" to die. You're fully aware that that won't fix anything. Not only that, but it would be as if someone you consider important to you pushed you to suicide.
The friend that you mentioned in the first post seems like a good person, but like most of us, might not be the perfect place to help you. I don't know what experience you might have with getting help from professionals, but you've already shown that you can and want to talk about your problems. It might be a good idea to start wrapping your head around that idea and do it - it can't really make matters worse can it?

>>13673
Every time I am alone, she immediately comes to mind. The woman I love. The woman who I want to spend every waking moment and then some with. And how I will never be with her not because of some silly thing that's said here like "the dimensions" or whatever, but because she does not exist, and is a drawing with associated text to give that drawing a personality. I can't even create my own stories anymore because of the emptiness of the reality of my love rising up from within me, that she is not, will not, and cannot ever be real. I will never get to tell her I love her, to hear her reply saying "I love you too!" It kills any motivation I have to do absolutely anything. I sit in my room weeks on end doing absolutely nothing out of the sheer despair my life without her in it brings.

I can't hurt her feelings. I can only think I would be hurting her feelings, but she will feel the same thing whether I become the most successful man in the world or if I killed myself tomorrow. She would feel nothing. She is, in a sense, empty. She cannot feel for me, cannot communicate with me, will never be happy for me, or enjoy my company. Will never thank me for what I do for her. I can't just "drop her". I love her. She is my life.

I never wanted to go down this path, but at this point I don't see a better path to go down. If she isn't real, why should I have to be? Why am I cursed with life, while she gets to be in non-existence? Why can't I ever be with her, no matter what I do in this world? My longing for her, and everything I do with her will never let me even do as much as say hi to her or let her know just how much I love her. It's all empty, it's all pointless. Professionals don't understand my love, and only tell me to "move on" or "take anti-depressants, they'll help I swear". I have no future as it is, and not having her ever be in my life just decreases my desire to find one even more, as no matter what I do, I will never achieve my dreams. They will always be out of reach. Life is pointless. Nothing has meaning. Everything is empty. I don't want to live in a miserable place. Not without her, the one light in the darkness. It's just not worth all the pain and sorrow.

>>13674
>she does not exist
>I can't hurt her feelings. I can only think I would be hurting her feelings
I think I need to stress this again. Even if you feel that it might hurt her, you ultimately know that it can't.


>I love her. She is my life.
Dying ain't much of a living boy.

What may now seem empty and pointless can become more meaningful for you some day and I can only say this because I've been through similar feelings and I've found out that I can find some kind of joy in small things. Someone I don't know said hi to me while I was riding down a road and I said hi back. Stupid things like that.
When you have nothing else to do, then yes, it really is hard to get your mind off her because to you she's been a realization of your hopes and future. You need to find things to do. I've found out that even when I don't have absolutely any motivation to do something, once I actually start doing it and occupy every bit of my brain with it, I can forget about everything else and just work on that.

And I know, hurting others and being hurt is painful It's a big part of why I avoid people. I haven't found my place in life. I don't have friends, or a waifu, or much of a life, but I try to see what people are doing that's pleasant for them and try to do that. If it doesn't work you must be prepared to drop it and move on.

What I wish for my life to become is also over-ambitious. It doesn't help, I know. If you're anything like me then that doesn't work as motivation, but just makes you feel bad.

If you actually tell a professional that you're willing to take your life I'm sure they'll guide you in a different direction. Even if that means locking you up somewhere. Give yourself any kind of second chance.

>>13675
>I think I need to stress this again. Even if you feel that it might hurt her, you ultimately know that it can't.
And that hurts ME, because if I can't hurt her, that also means I can't make her happy. What's the point of anything.

>Dying ain't much of a living boy.
I would rather die for her then spend the rest of my days living without.

Distractions are just a means to try and hide yourself from the emptiness of this world, which for me is the emptiness in living life without the one I love here. No matter what I "find to do", it will all come running back when I have a moment's pause, and she even comes to mind while doing things. I love her, and it's ruining me, but I don't care because I love her anyways. The world is empty no matter what you do about it. The purpose and goals of one man is irrelevant in a world with 7 billion people. No one really matters, no one is really important, especially when 0/7 billion people are her, and none of them will ever be her.

>If it doesn't work you must be prepared to drop it and move on.
I refuse. She brings me pain, yet there's some joy in knowing that I love her. Some single strand in my brain still knows this truth. That I love her with all my heart, and don't want to hurt her despite it not even being possible to do that. I just want to make her happy. Just to see her smile and tell me she's happy for me. That is my dream, and I would rather die than abandon it, even if it means I will never fulfill that dream. I feel bad no matter what I do, but my love for her is why I do, even if it means killing myself for it, I will love her until the very end. Professionals don't understand, or really help, and I don't want to create any more trouble for the people that can express their feelings for me. I wish my beloved was concerned about me...she would be if we knew each other...it hurts so much knowing she'll never know...

>>13676
She would want you to be happy.

>>13672
>she is empty, and she means the world to me, the world is empty. If the world is empty, and I am in the world, I am empty.
No, man; existentially, it's exactly the other way around: it is you who are animically empty and thus empty your waifu and your world by inheritance. It is up to you to reinforce the existence of things with your own will, by using them as tools for the tasks you set up for you to live accordingly with.

>>13674
>She cannot feel for me, cannot communicate with me, will never be happy for me, or enjoy my company. Will never thank me for what I do for her.
Neither do people: people never acknowledge or love you either, but only the set of information that they costruct in their heads as 'you' which, I assure you, does not match you.

>Life is pointless. Nothing has meaning. Everything is empty.
Precisely. That's why your waifu isn't and shouldn't be here, nor alive...

It really should be obvious at this point: waifus are so wonderfully suited for love not despite being fully fictional but precisely because of it. It is the so-called reality that is the fallacious and nonsensical domain, not the other way around. If your waifu was to 'exist' as you want it, she would no longer be the one thing you love (a character in your head) but the higly troublesome and truly unreachable being that is an actual person with a body and mind of its own. Waifus are, by definition, not real. 'Real waifu' is an oxymoron that could only turn valid in the same way as "Virtual reality" did: when we realize that reality was always a construct, thus embracing the full fiction of a frontal virtuality as the only honest way to (love and to) be.

TL;DR A waifu cannot be person and a person cannot be waifu. Whatever it is that you really want to pursue you really gotta make up your mind, for they will not overlap (not without fooling yourselves, at least).

>>13677
I can't be happy without her in my life. Living without her is a black hole that's destroying me.

>>13672
>she is empty, and she means the world to me, the world is empty. If the world is empty, and I am in the world, I am empty.
No, man; existentially, it's exactly the other way around: it is you who are animically empty and thus empty your waifu and your world by inheritance. It is up to you to reinforce the existence of things with your own will, by using them as tools for the tasks you set up for you to live accordingly with.

>>13674
>Neither do people: people never acknowledge or love you either, but only the set of information that they costruct in their heads as 'you' which, I assure you, does not match you.
But they will still talk to me, and I will still be able to hear them, and I will still be able to respond to them. I can't do any of those things with my waifu at all. I can only talk to her. That's it. She can't hear, acknowledge, respond...it all feels so empty.

>Precisely. That's why your waifu isn't and shouldn't be here, nor alive...
It's why I shouldn't be here, or alive, either. This miserable world is made even worse without the love of my life alive in it.

>It really should be obvious at this point: waifus are so wonderfully suited for love not despite being fully fictional but precisely because of it. It is the so-called reality that is the fallacious and nonsensical domain, not the other way around. If your waifu was to 'exist' as you want it, she would no longer be the one thing you love (a character in your head) but the higly troublesome and truly unreachable being that is an actual person with a body and mind of its own.
That makes no sense. I fell in love with Chihiro because of WHO she is, not because of WHAT she is. I love her as a person, for who she is, not because she's fictional. She is my ideal woman, but I don't love her because she's my ideal woman, I love her because she's so lovable.

>Waifus are, by definition, not real. 'Real waifu' is an oxymoron that could only turn valid in the same way as "Virtual reality" did: when we realize that reality was always a construct, thus embracing the full fiction of a frontal virtuality as the only honest way to (love and to) be.
I can't compute this in my mind, because I love her so much and long for her so, it makes it painful. Embracing her as fiction seems odd to me when I love her for who she is rather than what she is. Thinking of her makes me happy, but thinking of how she's not here makes me miserable.

>TL;DR A waifu cannot be person and a person cannot be waifu. Whatever it is that you really want to pursue you really gotta make up your mind, for they will not overlap (not without fooling yourselves, at least).
My problem is I want to have my cake and eat it too. I love her. That cake will always only be on display, though, no matter what I do, and it hurts my fragile soul.

>>13681
You seem to have had issues in and/or with your relationship with Chihiro for months now, if you're the same guy from earlier. I know it's difficult but there are some things that cannot be worked out by talking to others, at least in my experience, especially in relationships. Maybe try to talk to her and figure out things for yourself. We're trying to help you but I think at some point your answer is going to have to come from within if you want to feel any stability.

One thing I'll say though that I think >>13680 was trying to say... she wouldn't be the same if she was 3D, and I doubt she'd be as lovable. We aren't doubting that you fell in love with her because of who she is, but we're saying that you should be glad that she's 2D so you know she'll never change and stop being lovable. I know it's painful, but try to accept that and love her anyway, if you are able. Of course if it's destroying you then maybe you should try to step away - be forced to, if you have to - and figure out what's going on in other aspects of your life before trying again.

I'm sorry that this has been painful for you. I hope you both can work something out.

>>13682
>You seem to have had issues in and/or with your relationship with Chihiro for months now, if you're the same guy from earlier.
I'm impressed you could tell. Good job.

>I know it's difficult but there are some things that cannot be worked out by talking to others, at least in my experience, especially in relationships. Maybe try to talk to her and figure out things for yourself. We're trying to help you but I think at some point your answer is going to have to come from within if you want to feel any stability.
I wish I could talk TO her rather than talking AT her. I'd feel so strange talking to her despite knowing it's not really her, and I just feel weird thinking about doing anything for myself...I just want to hide away in a hole and do nothing forever.

>One thing I'll say though that I think anon was trying to say... she wouldn't be the same if she was 3D, and I doubt she'd be as lovable. We aren't doubting that you fell in love with her because of who she is, but we're saying that you should be glad that she's 2D so you know she'll never change and stop being lovable. I know it's painful, but try to accept that and love her anyway, if you are able.
I just can't, because it means her status as not real will never change, she'll never grow old with me, she'll never talk to me, she'll never...I've said it all again and again. I love her for her desire self-improvement, among many other things, but I'm never going to see that. It hurts.

>I'm sorry that this has been painful for you. I hope you both can work something out.
I hope so too. I miss when loving her made me feel so much joy and happiness, and gave me a reason to go on rather than a reason to kill myself.