The Loans were Federal aid, the kind you cant escape even by declaring Bankruptcy. If I kill myself would my parents have to pay them back?

>>1251
No, not unless they cosigned, and even then I'm not sure it works that way; laws that force relatives of the deceased have been eradicated in the U.S. for a long time now. Don't off yourself, though, your parents would be grief-filled and disappointed.

I was told to be a doctor or a surgeon. Most of my years at uni went straight from a 3.something to a 2.5 something. Then I worked hard during these past semesters to raise it up to exactly a 3.000. Instead, I decided to just aim for anything that could help me get into a grad school and do research for the rest of my life.

If I ended with a shit ton of debt, then I'd probably agree to join the military as a civilian working for them, since they do look for those with masters' degrees (maybe even bachelors) quite a lot. Plus, I'd end up earning more money than my parents or even my sister. The question is if I will actually get into a masters' degree program. I haven't prepared anything for that yet.

>>1251
>All loans received under programs authorized by Title IV, of the Higher Education Act can be canceled for several different circumstances including: (1) in the event of your death; or (2) if you become totally and permanently disabled after the loan is disbursed.

I'd rather join the military than die.

I must of had typical childhood dreams at some point. For my school years I always just took the easiest subjects so that I could glide through without having to stress myself, without thinking about school (either concerned or about my general surroundings and surrounding people). I never really set a goal like wanting to be a doctor or anything.

I've wondered if that has hindered me to where I am today (a hikikomori). My social reclusiveness has undoubtedly came as a result of my choices during school, which were caused by a lack of motivation. However, I can never remember ever being motivated to go and learn though, to get a good job or achieve a dream. Perhaps it was inevitable. Maybe at some point I will realize a dream I want to fulfill, that I will be capable of.

I was inspired by Carl Sagan's Pale Blue Dot and wanted to be an astronomer when I was a kid. Then I grew up and realized I couldn't sustain myself off of something like that. Now I'm taking CS because it's the only thing I'm remotely good at and I hate every minute of it.

From ages 3/4-7 I wanted to be a mad scientist, which would still be cool but is impractical. From ages 8-12 I wanted to be a Marine due to living in an extremely conservative home in the post-9/11 era. However, I found out that I was ineligible for service due to Aspergers. Now I don't have any desires or goals career-wise.

Dreams, I have none. I came into this world, 22 years of a suffering life later, I still don't know where I am going or what's my purpose. I have no will other than to know what I am supposed to do.

Yes, yes. I'm sure my parents would have wanted me to become someone. Doctor, attorney, businessman, engineer, all were possibilities within my reach. They never told me I had to become something in particular, only that I had to study, whatever it was, I needed to study so that I at least would be better off than they are.

I never liked school. I passed a brilliant first year in elementary school. The second year I was already a slacker. Wrote the first pages of the single book we had and then the very last ones so that at the end of the year I could show the teacher I had done something. I'm in my first year of university now. Dropped only once in my life, in college. I've come this far and hate it more every single day. I just want to flee.

I don't care about money. Yes, now that I wrote this, I think I just wanted to be happy.

I wanted to be an explorer. Just to be free 100% of the time, roaming the globe having adventures. Whether by land, sea or air, the idea always excited me so much.

I never pictured myself alone though, that might suck. So if I ever win the lottery, I will buy the S.S. Tohno-chan and we will all go live the life of modern day adventurers.

I don't think I ever really had much of a dream. At around age 12 I decided I wanted to be a writer, but I think I just decided that because of a general atmosphere of feeling like I needed to have a "thing" to do with my life. Not a real goal, just something so I could tell other people I had one.

I don't really have any specific goals, I basically just want to avoid embarrassment, judgment, insults, pain, etc.

I liked two things as a child, video games and animals.

Now, I don't know anything about coding or game design. My mom always said (well, up until about a year or two ago) that I could go work for Nintendo. Too bad she didn't seem to know that that required a skill in something......

And I rarely go outside, I'm weak, and I get scared if I see a dog behind a gate when I'm walking.

Eh, I guess most people don't have enjoyable jobs, or anything related to their interests. I'd rather not work than do something I don't like. But that won't be an option soon enough.

I can't really think of any 'broken' dreams. The only thing that comes to mind is the fact that I can't ever do what I want to (something like a musician, a writer, or an artist), simply because of a sheer lack of talent, and a lack of motivation to practice and get talent due to the lack of talent. It's a cycle that can be easily broken, and yet I refuse to for whatever reason.

I've never had any specific dreams besides "be rich". I suppose that would still be possible if I won the lottery or something

>>1254

>I must of had typical childhood dreams at some point.

At first I overlooked 'typical' in your sentence and I wanted to say you took it straight out of my mouth. Well, it was close enough.

I seriously MUST have had some dreams.
I'm not talking about those I had as a child since I still remember it - I wanted to be a paleontologist. I watched all kinds fo shows on Discovery/Animal Planet (etc) and my mom always bought me the books I wanted. Oh, and of course I had tons of dinosaur toys. But by the time I turned ~11 it was clear to my that while dinosaurs are fun and all being a paleontologist is really, really boring. Since then I pretty much lost all my interest in that subject. Looking back on it, I must've been a somewhat smart kid, I realized how lots of stuff works in this world fairly quick.

Since then I honestly don't remember anything (about my dreams of course). Pathetic, really. No dreams whatsoever. Makes me wonder why... Well, I never thought about my future that much. I thought I'll be some kind of stock broker or that I'll do some similar, rather tedious job that I won't like. But that was only for a short amount of time. By the time I turned 15 I was completely obsessed with suicide. I think it was meant to be that way. Even when I was still in elementary school I (jokingly, but still) said I was gonna kill myself someday (not because I was depressed or anything, I had fairly decent childhood) and I had some interest in the subject.
When I was 16 I was ready to do it. I knew I'm capable of doing it while being fully concious of what it is exactly that I'm doing (as oppossed to just doing it on a whim - it's not like you'll have to face any 'consequences' in that case), I knew how I'm gonna do it, I was beginning to prepare some necesarry 'supplies', I had a vague idea of when and where to do it. When I asked a fr... an acquaintance of mine (who was a scout) if I'm doing a proper job with the gallows knot (I knew she knew a lot about all sorts of knots) I was sure my 'secret' is safe. She was always cold, distant, gloomy. Definitely that kind of person who you'd expect to be able to keep a secret and we were on good terms, too. But she folded under pressure and told a teacher at our school (who was mother of a friend of ours). Caught me completely off guard. Shit went places after that. It's a long story, really, but as you were probably able to guess I didn't kill myself.

I feel like I lost a chance back then. A chance to go down with some dignity. As weird as it sounds I have a lot of respect for the person I was back then. Now I'm nothing more than thrash. In a way, you could say that my dream was to kill myself and even though I was unable to do it for so long I know that sooner or later the day will come. It's just that this time, I will do it because I have to and I bet I'll be filled with shame and regret.

If this doesn't count I guess in a way I wished (as cheesy as it sounds) that the world was a better place.

>>1263

Oh yeah, now that I think about it that was my dream, too. Oh, and I just remebered I wanted to be a bachelor, I shit you not. Damn I really was smart, wasn't I? Too bad I grew up to be a retard. Wasted potential I guess.

>>1263
This. I'd like to be rich enough to buy a small private island, build a nice house/mansion and employ a small staff to keep services and supplies running and take care of my needs. The whole upshot of this is I wouldn't ever have to deal with most anyone ever again, and when you're extremely rich people will write that kind of behavior off as being eccentric and won't bother you in any case.

Of course, I won't ever have that kind of money, probably not even a thousandth of it. But it's a nice thing to think about anyway.

>What are your broken Dreams?

To be honest, even as a child I had no dreams or aspirations to speak of. All of the professions I became familiarized with over time seemed all equally boring to me. So now I have no crushed dreams. Feels good man, until the realization that I will work in a slave factory my entire life, or at least until I shoot myself. ;_;

Get a masters, move to the US and get a job at the NASA (one friend had a job there and said he would explain me how), help humankind and make the world a sightly better place.

Unfortunately I found the horrible truth that people can be happy anywhere. A computer and a meal is everything that I need. Since I lost my ambitions I also lost any motivation to keep trying.

After being a NEET for a year and not knowing what to do with my life, I think I'll join all this "zen working" crazy.
4 hour workweek, steve pavlina, zen habits, rework. It seems like a scam but it does makes sense.

Becoming an entrepreneur and without having a soul crushing job, possibly working with fellow neet/hikkis over the internet sounds kind of nice.

>broken Dreams

Be a ballet dancer. That's the only thing I ever really wanted to do and fought with all my strength for. Now I just don't care.

I've had several dreams throughout my life each broken horribly

When I was young I was fascinated by space and everything about it--I wanted to be a astronaut. But no john, astronauts need math! And I'm not good at math. After being put down about my math everytime I brought it up I gave up, I knew I was shit at math and even though I tried my hardest wasn't getting any better at it.

A few years later I had took up reading books, and decided I wanted to be a author, repeat math with english and such shitty fiction writing I doubt a mother could love.

So in my late teens I decided I wanted to be a graphic designer, here I am in college and you might say that dream has been crushed as well despite doing it better than ever... its something I can do I've just lost my interest in it and dread doing anything related to art, if someone told me they wanted to be a artist the only advice I'd give them would be don't even think about going to college for it or selling your work.

>I was inspired by Carl Sagan's Pale Blue Dot and wanted to be an astronomer when I was a kid.


Basically what happened to me, except I realized I was stupid and unable to do such a thing.

Now I'm lucky just to find work in a kitchen somewhere

Can't think of any.

Now I dream of becoming a 2D loli.

>>1271
Same. Hopefully virtual reality will help us live that dream one day, and we can afford it...

I wanted to be a journalist and even went to university, but my social phobia stopped me from doing anything. Oh well.

>What are your broken Dreams?
I wanted to be what you' call a "normalfag".

I never had dreams to begin with

I supposed I'd had the unrealistic expectation of being the best at anything I do but that was dashed in preschool though I still hold that general attitude and am consistently let down

I wanted to get a Ph.D. in Physics but I ended up dropping out of high school. Then I tried finding love only to toss a few more years away with an abusive girl. Now I'm looking for a job so I can make enough money to move out and fill my room with computers. Technology is all I have left.

I don't really have any significant long-term 'dreams'. I haven't created them yet, and i'm not old enough to have failed in achieving them.

My dream is to make music. My ultimate goal is to stand on a stage and play my songs to the masses. It's not a broken dream; I refuse to give up, no matter how much life kicks the shit out of me. Pierce the heavens, brohnos.

I never had dreams to begin with. ;_;

>>1319
You should get that checked out.

To write, but that pays like ass and it's too late for me to start.

Otherwise I wanted to go into astronomy or quantum physics or some shit, but it's too hard as a job.

That or build weapons.

I wanted to be an archeologist. Then I realized there's probably no fabulous tombs left to find. ;_;

I wanted to be a policeman, then I heard stories about them getting killed while giving speeding tickets.

I wanted to be a fireman, then I heard stories of them getting killed while leaving burning houses.

I wanted to be a chemist, then I found out it wasn't just mixing koolaid and tea and tasting what was left.

I wanted to be a doctor, then I heard about how tough it is and realized I didn't want to be a doctor that bad.


I wanted to be a baker, then I realized the only reason for my wanting to be one was because Clannad romanticized it for me.

I want to be a househusband now, mainly because it allows me to be a shutin while also satisfying my submissive side by dedicating my life to my lover.
Unfortunately, it requires a lover.

I'm planning on going to medschool now.

>>1338
go to China there's plenty of unexplored shit there...

I never had a dream.

I just wanted to play video games. Life was great until I graduated from high school and my mother started trying to shove me out of the door. I work a shitty job and go to a community college now, but I'm not really interested in any of that stuff.

I still spend the majority of my time playing video games. They're the only things that make me happy.

My broken dream was to get married and raise a family. I didn't really care what else I did as long as I could find someone to fall in love and have children with. Really...

As time wore on I began to learn about human nature and it terrified me. I guess I come off as very non-threatening or judgmental so people would expose their dark sides to me and it just really threw a wrench in the works as far as what I wanted out of life.

I'm glad I finally learned my lesson, though. I wouldn't change it for anything. I honestly believe that 99% of the relationships people have are bullshit. People are just afraid of being alone. They'll sell each other out and cheat and fuck one another over for no good reason all the time. I'm too sensitive for that crap. My ego couldn't take walking in on my wife with my best friend. I'd kill myself.

That's why my relationship with my waifu is so special to me. It's a hell of a lot more fulfilling. I don't live my life trying to cater to some fickle person's whims and deal with drama and aggravation all the time. I just have lost my ability to deal with that kinda BS.

>>1401
This. I won't say any more about this, but 3D relationships are overrated and those who push 3D relationships on others aren't there to help. They're only there to feel better about themselves. Apparently they think being alone is a bad thing.

For most of my life, I had no idea what i'd do once my education had finished. I always just figured i'd deal with the problem when it came around, but gradually that came closer and closer and I still had nothing.

Then, when I was about to be thrown out into the world, I by amazing fortune discovered a certain book. I never was terribly fond of books, but that one... it was extraordinary. I don't know how, but it changed me for the better, in alot of ways. One such way was that suddenly my imagination blossomed. Before, I had practically never had an original thought in my life, but suddenly I was able to see the world in entirely new lights. I even began to have ideas for books of my own... which is where broken dreams come in.

I don't really feel comfortable elaborating right now... but I will say that there really is no worse feeling than the crushing of hope.

>>1435
If I may ask without offending, what book was this?

>>1435
Was it Mein Kampf?

>>1435
I knew I wasn't the only one who read Hannah Montana's book.

The only dreams I have I would never be able to achieve without a miracle. In practical terms I have no dreams, and I never did. I still have obligations which I meet, but I carry them out without any feeling or purpose. I live for other people because I have no reason to live for myself.

All probably sounds like I might go off and end it all, but I've never once thought of doing that. I just don't have any particular goals in my life, and that frustrates me.