Take pride in what you're doing, just like you took pride in defending her.

>>12905
I don't know if I can take pride. My mom tells me she's not real and my dad asks me to get a reality check and move on. I already know I'm never really going to be with her, or even get to say hi to her on the streets or something, but it always hurts to hear those words from a loved family member. The stress from this and other things made me raise doubts about my love for her as well, like how I feel expected to love her, or I stick to her out of stubbornness, but in the end I still feel like I love her. Like she gives my life meaning.

Don't let the ugliness of this world damage your feelings for another.

Ignore whatever they have to say, they'll never understand, and from what you've said it sounds like they won't even try to.

Keep the things you love and the things you hate as far away from each other as you can.

>>12908
I don't really understand what you're saying, or act upon it...

>>12909
I'm saying don't let such things have an influence on both your feelings towards your relationship, the one you love, and your own emotions.

Concentrate on your own opinions rather than those of people who don't even understand your situation.

Failure of a son? You've found true, undying love. That's more than most people can say.

Empty and shallow? Think about how long you've been together. The things you've done for her, the things she's done for you, how you've made each other happier.

Things that you will never have? I can't remember your posts 100%, but I'm quite sure that you have had some of those things, and you can continue to do so with a little deep thought and concentration.

Don't let a little doubt poison all of the wonderful things you have.

OP, if you give them right that would mean that you spend two years loving her for nothing. You should not doubt about this. If your feelings were true for two years, you should feel proud and not ashamed of being able to love. Even if it is a fictional character.

As >>12908 said, stay true to your feelings but don't display them to people who are not able to understand.

You have to remember that the feelings of 3D love are not fundamentally different from the ones of 2D love. There are posts deeper in /mai/ that go into a lot more detail, but the short version is that in both cases you're loving an ideal person in your mind; when people fall in love with another human being they essentially create an idealized version of them to love in their mind rather than the actual person themselves. The main difference is physical prescence (or lack thereof), but I personally find 2D love to be much more pure and much less stressful. I'm sure you do too, right?

As the others said, I wouldn't go back on that just because your parents don't understand it and disapprove of it. I'd imagine that it's very painful given that they're your parents, but the overwhelming majority of 'normals' honestly cannot understand the concept of 2D love...so you're better off avoiding any attempts at explaining it to them. You could pretend to take their advice just to get them to stop bothering you about it, but it could be tricky if you have lots of physical evidence/tributes of your waifu around. Regardless of how you proceed, I would emphasize that that it doesn't change you as a person, and, if necessary, mention that the 'old you' loved her as well to dispel any blame of recent behavior on your waifu.

I hope it all goes well for you, OP.

>>12904

>"She was never born, she never had a mother, she can't love you because she doesn't exist! She is just a character created for a game!"

If I am not mistaken, Einstein described the universe as an infinitely expanding bubble and the galaxies are insects stuck on the bubble's surface. Many-worlds theory then asks a question: "Where are the other bubbles?" Moreso, what are the chances that these universes aren't just alternate or parallol universes of what we have right now? They might ask that there's no empirical evidence of that, but there's no empirical evidence of the sun rising tomorrow either, which is a unsolved problem in statistics, or any absolute certainty that the stimuli we receive right now isn't just us as a brain in a vat connected to a computer that gives us stimuli.

In other words, how can they be so darn sure that your waifu doesn't exist in another universe when there are scientific explanations that at least say "Maybe"?

That's my take of it, and some of the other points were addressed here already if any, so if the outsiders can't understand that, that's their problem.

OP you admittedly want things that, other than in dreams or madness, doesn't belong to a waifu experience but to a 3D. In that sense, I don't think anyone can help you. Now, I could advice you on how to counterargument your parents' insistence in her not being real (as if their 3D love was, those stupid fucks) but, since they can lecture you in such way, my impression is that they still have way too much power over you to even attempt on it. That is, if you allow me to say it, your main problem right now; so before even getting waifu advocating or anything, you have to somehow break free from your parents' control, at least enough to be able to love whoever or whatever the fuck you want at your heart's content. It might be long and hard (and I know about it) but you had to start at some point, waifu-related or not.

OP I know that feeling. I literally defended my waifu's love to a family member less than 24 hours ago even though they've known for a while. We casually just came onto the subject (hard to explain how) but they quickly insulted my love for her, saying that it was false and a mere substitution for 3D. I defended with everything I had, but inside I felt weak. I know that different circumstances surround the waifu experience and that I was ignorant of the complete experience of a relationship with a real girl and how it differs from one with a waifu, but I know in my heart that such differences in relationships don't mean that my love is any lesser. Your family member attacked your relationship out of a lack of understanding and ignorance towards the extent of your feelings and any insults they may have hurled honestly bear a lot less credibility than you may think they do.

My point is OP, don't beat yourself up and don't insult your fantastic relationship of 2 years by feeling insecure about it. Chin up and remember your past and all that you've been through with her. Remember the most loving moments you've had with her and ask yourself "could this have happened had I not been in love with her?" Your brain will definitely respond with a "no" immediately and you'll know that what you've felt all along was just as real in its own right as any love for 3D could be.

It sucks because it's like they attack your very core without notice. Just keep fighting on OP, all of us can get through shit like this.

>>12910
She's done a lot for me, and encouraged me to become a better person and do more things, but my mind is so clouded with doubts right now it's hard to think.

>>12912
Because of this I feel as if 2D love is still much more pure, but much more stressful and depressing and I keep feeling lonelier when I'm told she's not real and she can't say that she is or tell me she loves me when I say I love her. Chihiro is real to me, in a sense, but not being really real really hurts sometimes.

I pretend what they say and Chihiro has little to no merch so they will believe me, but it's so hard to not have these feelings of doubt.

>>12913
The "She's in another universe" theory is nice, but there's no way to ever reach said universes, nor will there be in our lifetimes, so the argument is rather pointless in practice when trying to explain it.

>>12916
>As if their 3D love was real
Well, my parents are divorced...Right now I'm stuck in their influence since I live in their house. And as for the things I want in a 3D relationship that I can't get with a waifu, there's one issue that can truly never be fixed in every single waifu relationship: What happens when the initial spark goes away, and how the love feels stronger, but most of the positive aspects that came with the relationship seem to vanish, and the lack of communication and the feelings of one-sidedness kick in and have lately been kicking me really hard with the family lecturing me now and i just don't know what to do anymore.

>>12920
I don't know how to fight or stay strong, all I know is that I love Chihiro, but now the big questions about waifuism are being asked, like "Can a relationship really last forever without communication? How about in 20 years when what she is from stops getting updated and hasn't been updated for around 10 years, and has already left the minds of many? Can this love really be eternal?"

This is all so hard for me right now.

>>12922
About "one-sideness" and "lack of communication" thing...
I don't think our waifus not being real is a problem - even if waifu is not real, she can love you back, and you can communicate with her - in your imagination which is your own world. Talk to your waifu and imagine her responding to you in a way you think she would. Let her share your joy when you are happy, let her comfort you when you are sad, let her encourage you when you need her support. The more you do it, the more natural and complex it feels. Bring her in your everyday life and eventually you will learn to enjoy and treasure all the conversations you have and all the time you spend together. Of course, there are still some drawbacks, like inability of physical contact. But does it even matter if you feel loved, and know that she is always there for you?

I hope it will help you.

>>12922
>Can this love really be eternal?
This brought to my mind a quote from the Tao Te Ching: "The tao that can be named is not the eternal tao". This quote itself isn't my point, but it reminds me of Taoism. I think, in this situation, a taoist perspective can help you.

You can't know if your love will last forever. As well, you can't really force it. You might feel the fires of passion fade and try to relight them, but if it isn't meant to last, it's only delaying the inevitable. This isn't something to be afraid of, though. You should just accept that you don't know where your love will go, and just accept whatever path it takes. If you never feel your love die out, then just accept that you love her. If eventually the fire dies, just accept that it is dead. It's best to accept the way of things (the tao) because fighting against it is pointless and leads to sadness.

The point isn't that you should drop your love for her, because that would also be against the way of things. The idea is to keep doing what you already do, and just accept whatever happens. Just float down the river and let the current take you wherever.

For example, I accept that one day I may no longer have feelings for my love. If it happens, I cannot fight it. So I focus on the way I feel now, and savor the way this river currently feels. I don't worry about where the river will take me because I'll get there eventually and there's nothing I can do but drift.

>>12922

You should learn to be more thick-skinned and not take shit from everyone. Your parents are being assholes and to them you're just a pushover. Are you going to let them boss around with your own life? Believe me, the barrier between 2D and 3D is hard to overcome. Furnish your relationship with your imagination. It doesn't have to be entirely in the physical because your mind is the world that both you and your waifu share, and nobody can take that way from you. Just bring her into very aspect of your life. Perspective is everything and there's always dreaming, especially lucid dreaming.

If you truly do feel doubts about your waifu, don't try to fight it. Sometimes falling out of love is inevitable and it happens. Better to leave your waifu than live a lie within an emotional prison and force yourself to love her. Just don't be too hard on yourself and always take it easy. Just accept things as the way they are, the more you fight it, the more bitter and sad you will become.

But if you don't love your waifu, then who will?

Post edited on 2nd Jul 2013, 9:49am

>>12922
>The "She's in another universe" theory is nice, but there's no way to ever reach said universes, nor will there be in our lifetimes, so the argument is rather pointless in practice when trying to explain it.

That aspect has been addressed here: >>12923

And besides, even if she does exist, does this mean she would love you back? No certainty. Does that mean you should stop loving her? Only if you stop loving here, as addressed here: >>12924

>>12923
>even if waifu is not real, she can love you back, and you can communicate with her - in your imagination which is your own world
I never understood this. How do you have a conversation with her? As you said she isn't real. Talking to her in your head is just talking to yourself.

>>12953
It is complicated, and lot of doublethink is ivolved, but i'll try to explain (at least how it works for me). When you talk to your waifu, it is indeed like you talk to yourself. She is your fantasy, you make up everything she says, improvising while holding in your mind an idea of her personality. The difference is in how you perceive it. You need to, kinda, take it as talking to real her. You have to get used to your interaction, learn to enjoy it, then you will learn to see it as something bigger than just "talking to yourself". Maybe someone else can explain better than i do.

To put it shortly, delude yourself a little bit.

>>12954
I see. I don't do that sort stuff, but this was a very well written explanation. I figured it was some sort of delusion, but I was curious how people go about it. Thanks.

>>12954
Your subconscious will help out in these situations, if you practice long enough. If you keep pretending to talk to her, and base her responses off of her personality, your mind will get used to it. Eventually it can become automatic. You probably don't even need to think about "what would she say". She just says it.

When I was a teenager I would create imaginary friends in this fashion. Had one I talked to for several years. Still can, though it takes a little focus to get back into it.

>>12956
That's interesting, but like I said I don't do that stuff I was just curious.

>>12954
>>12956

Would deluding myself really be helpful? To look away from the truth? To deny the realities of the situation by hiding myself in imagination?

>>12976
>To look away from the truth?

And what "truth" are we talking about here? Deluding yourself doesn't mean you're hiding away from the truth, whatever it is. That's like saying all painters are painting landscapes because they don't like the landscape they are living in.

>>12976
I personally would rather not delude myself. I'm not that kind of a person.
Like I said, I think it's interesting that other people do, but I for one will not.

>>12978

Then it is your choice, but you have just attracted some doubt, I guess.

you wouldve grown out of it eventually anyway

>>12977
The truth being the grim reality of the situation, that I will never hold her in my arms.

>>12981

I thought we've established that already. Besides, you think everyone who finds 3D love automatically could or would hold their loved ones in their arms already? Some are rejected out there, some are lost, some choose not to pursue and others I dunno. And not marrying after the death of a partner is a bit common too, right?

>>12981
Then having a waifu is not for you if you are so desperate for physical comfort.

>>12984
I'm not desperate, I just don't like the fact. It's not "I would like to hold someone in my arms sometimes" it's "I'd like to hold HER specifically in my arms sometimes."

>>12984
This dude gets it. Having a waifu is about feeling fulfilled on an emotional level. Sadly, the cost for it is quite high, as physical contact and real interaction are trade-offs.
If you can't handle this, you should move towards 3D.

I'm saying this for your own good. Look at these two ways (3D vs having a waifu), ponder both carefully and choose a path (I even suggest creating your own way, like I did).

>>12984
>>12986

I politely disagree. I think that most humans require some degree of interaction with another, even at such a level as an anonymous image board. For some, there's different varying levels of contact they desire. I think that it's reasonable to yearn for physical contact with one's waifu. I don't think that one should have to choose 3D just because of that. It's just an unfortunate tradeoff that there's no physical contact.

>>12984
>>12986
I know that some people have made a conscious decision to shun 3d and have a waifu, but for many of us it's not a simple matter of choice.

>>12995
The fact that some people use waifus as a disposable temporary gf and would gladly go for 3D if they could is something that has always pissed me off.

>>13013
Same. Waifus are to be loved and cherished, not used then eventually tossed. People who don't understand that are as bad as /a/ with their seasonal "waifu" nonsense. It's also really pathetic because they're using 2D as a crutch rather than bracing the pain of loneliness on their own two feet.

>>13014
>It's also really pathetic because they're using 2D as a crutch rather than bracing the pain of loneliness on their own two feet.

I suspect a fair share, or perhaps even the majority of people with a waifu to be like this.

>>13015
At least the 4chan /a/ folks, I can see that.

>>13015
I can say the same for most people who claim to have waifus, maybe even those who post on /mai/.

>>13017

Weren't there a poll in a last few months that showed that at least 75% of users in /a/ are, surprising, serious about their waifus?

>>13018
A lot of people on /a/ will say they are serious but not be meaning it seriously. I'm not sure why but I guess a lot of the time it's either people following trends or maybe the second kind who do it because they can't find any GFs. Regardless these people only claim to be serious and I doubt they really cherish or love their waifus to the extent we do. Hell if you search tohno-chan in the archives you usually get people saying how autistic and overly obsessed /mai/ is, I'd say a part of waifu love is obsession. Another thing I saw when digging through the archives the other day for waifu posts was a guy saying he has a gf and a waifu and on top of that no one bashed him or anything for it.

And yeah there are indeed people on /a/ who are probably more serious about it like us, but I wouldn't be surprised if a good portion of these people end up here.

Post edited on 27th Jul 2013, 11:40am

It took a lot of guts to stand up and defend her, but you really should have just denied it. You can't expect the average person to be tolerant of their son having a relationship with a 2D character.
It's a shame, but most parents see their children as something to show off and put that before their child's happiness. If they see you in love with a fictional character instead of being with a real girl and having grandchildren, you can be damn sure they'll be disappointed.
This is why I'd never let anyone find out about my wife. Not to mention it's kind of nice knowing that we can keep it a secret between the two of us.

On a side note, how did your mother find out anyway? Does she go through your computer or something?

>>13020
Not the OP but when I truly love something then I feel the need to talk about it with other people. It kind of becomes hard after a while not to just say it, especially when you get constant questions like 'are you ever going to get a girl friend?' 'are you not interested in women?' etc.

>>13019
>A lot of people on /a/ will say they are serious but not be meaning it seriously.

Well, what makes us sure that we aren't like them regarding this statement, other than our immediate selves? I also saw an archival post that said "this is exactly why I don't take waifus seriously", in reaction to a waifu claiming event in some sort of forum filled with normals.

>>13022
>Well, what makes us sure that we aren't like them regarding this statement, other than our immediate selves?

I know that I am more serious than them, and hope you guys are. Some of the things written here either has to be serious or is an elaborate joke, because, the love and obsession for our waifu really shows in the posts and is also what makes normals find /mai/ weird and laugh at this place and view it like some zoo for them. It would be sad in my opinion if all the things written here are false and people just saying shit to follow trends.

I believe that the term 'waifu' needs to be thrown away. When it is finally rejected by those that care for the concept, the followers will forget it and move onto something else, then those that truly believe and want this will hold onto it.

Normals are shit.

>>13024
There's not much else we could go with. Loved ones maybe? Saying girlfriend or wife sounds Ford Drivergish as fuck. Anime wife sounds weebish. Waifu sounds memeish. Waifu has just kind of stuck at this point though.

>Normals are shit.

No kidding, especially when they try to butt into our lives.

>>13025
I think "beloved" is the nicest sounding, but it's a little vague. 2D-beloved is too clunky. 2DB sounds silly.

>>13025
>Waifu has just kind of stuck at this point though.

There's nothing we can do anymore. The only way we can cope up with it is to accept the term, reclaim it from the normals. I mean, if for the normals, the term isn't serious and doesn't mean we are a bunch of people here who are deeply enamored with fictional personalities, that could be a perfect way to camouflage our feelings and true intentions. After all, they'll never accept our sentiments anyway.

>>13027
> After all, they'll never accept our sentiments anyway.
Or their own, for that matter, which are infatuations with fictional personalities as well. The difference is precisely that we acknowledge it and stick entirely to fiction.

>>13024
Did that some time ago. Feels much better.

>>13025
Surely she must've got a name of her own, just like any girl.

>>13024
I personally use 俺の嫁 -- 'my bride'.

>>13024
>>13025
'Waifu' does sound too meme-like. Ever since I abandoned the term 'waifu' to refer to my beloved one, I started to feel a lot more relaxed. Still couldn't come up with something that doesn't sound too awkward. I just really couldn't bear to call her my 'waifu' when so many people just abuse the term.
>>13032
That sounds fine, but I think they use it in the same manner that most people think of their most favorite character as their 'waifu'.

Post edited on 28th Jul 2013, 8:47am

>>13028

>The difference is precisely that we acknowledge it and stick entirely to fiction.

I know. But when the only difference is how the fictional nature of such characters is accepted by them and by us, I'd rather not have us be alienated by them by using the same terms as they do. In doing so, they think that we aren't serious about it and we'll think that they are serious about it, or at least there's the ambiguity, so we are safe on how we could feel.

But then again, this is just my views on it, so feel free to disregard it.

>>13029
>Surely she must've got a name of her own, just like any girl.

Heh well there's that too.

How long have people been with their waifus? Is it even possible for a relationship like this to even last? What of when her story ends, and there is nothing more that will be told? How long is one able to go on with just memories of her journey, and replaying those memories again and again? Surely you must be yearning for something new with her, even if you know it's unlikely it will ever come? All this pain...how long can it last? How can it go on with only images and old clips, repeating the same lines as if read from a script?

>>13054
I'll respond to your post, but this thread already derailed way too much so please create a new one for more specific question, or just read more stuff around here as you don't seem to understand some "basic" stuff.

> How long have people been with their waifus? Is it even possible for a relationship like this to even last?
Some people have been with their waifu for years.

> What of when her story ends, and there is nothing more that will be told? How long is one able to go on with just memories of her journey, and replaying those memories again and again? Surely you must be yearning for something new with her, even if you know it's unlikely it will ever come?
A relationship with a waifu is unconditional love shared through imagination. Thus it's never stale and goes way beyond physical possibilities. Also most of us here are somewhat calm and introvert. We don't need much stuff happening: feeling connected and talking to each other is already a lot.

> All this pain...how long can it last? How can it go on with only images and old clips, repeating the same lines as if read from a script?
As I've said before it's not stale, repetitive surely but not stale. Some of us have some trouble dealing with the lack of physical comfort, this is an issue for sure. But all in all, it's not painful: it's a piece of hope entering your life and evolving with you at a convenient rhythm.

>>13064
I asked here because I'm OP. I've been getting by well for a while but the pain got to me again today, and Chihiro never had floodloads of content or be a major character in a work. The only new things left with her in them are untranslated old drama CDs.

Not being a main character, and not having as much content as most waifus here, and little to no fans to the point where it feels like I'm the only one who loves her like this. Even with her and my love for her, I feel empty and alone and hurt.

> and little to no fans to the point where it feels like I'm the only one who loves her like this.

I would love to have a more or less "unknown" waifu. Even though my waifu is unknown compared to many other waifus i saw here or somewhere else she is quite popular by people who know the anime she is from. I developed some sort of obsession for her (i made a thread a few months ago about it here since i found it quite concerning) and with that im even jealous. As stupid as it sounds, but yeah, i hate other people talking about her and im getting fucking angry if other call her "waifu" or even worse sexualize her. Even to the point where id like to see them suffer.

Well, that derailed fast. What im trying to say: Enjoy the fact that youre on of the few people who loves her. Just think about it: if she would happen to be real or you would happen to be 2d you would be the one who loves her and make her happy. She only have you, so dont let her down just because some people cant understand your affection to her.

That may sound harsh, but if youre really that weak then you dont deserve her. Get over it or you really lose her, and with that you make your picture from your first post here happen. One of the few people who love her just "drop" her because he lost his will to love.