How do people treat me when it is unavoidable?... If it's family members, they treat me coldly, except for my mom. They give me glares and the ominous "i wish you were dead" aura emanates from their glares. When it comes to family members' friends, they treat me like I'm some sort of loony and act nice to me. "Oh.. so you're xxxx's brother... nice to meet you!... I've heard.. alot about you.." ... in which I respond with a simple, "Nice to meet you too.. Make yourself at home, and if there is something you need, don't hesitate to ask"-- which in return... they give me a surprised look which almost translates to a "whoa, he can speak English!?".

So, to answer your question.. I find it pretty normal.

Like some kind of handicapped retard.
They don't say much, but what they do say is extremely condescending, they talk down to me as if I was a child.

>>9239
Yeah, this. I got That feelinging all the time in high school when dealing with teachers

>>9239

I get that too. On the very odd occasion I do leave my bedroom while other people are here they notice and make a thing about it, and get up all close and try to hug me. I've even got this one woman who thought it would be good to stroke my hair and face as though I was a little nine year old or something, it was so unbelievably awkward. I wonder if they are so touchy and condescending with all people younger than them or if I have some kind of reputation or something and they think I'm some kind of retard.

>>9240
>That feelinginging

Err, I didn't type that

>>9243
sorry about that, it's from a word filter that was supposed to replace 'that feel' with 'that feeling'

>>9245
There is usually a 'when' right after, so you can filter on that basis.

>>9245
you made me think I had a stroke!

I think most of my parent's guests don't even know I live here. On the rare occasions I have to leave my room while someone is here they usually stop talking, and look at me like "who the hell is that?".

We exchange greetings and I return to my room

I get treated like I have downs.

I tend to hide out, so I don't know how they really treat me.

At most, I utter a hello how are you oh ok bye, then retreat to a safe zone until they leave.

>>9353
It's pretty much the same for me.

My mum has been seeing some guy since November or something. He occasionally comes to our house every two weeks or so. I still haven't met him. I don't want to meet anyone. I've always hated introductions and pointless small talk my whole life.

>>9358
I'm in the same boat. My mom went off and got engaged to this dude.

He's so damn nice, it makes me feel scummy. Both because of the people who have asshole "stepfathers" when they don't deserve them and the fact that someone's nice to me. His family has been really accepting and all that jazz. I haven't had a "family" since I was around 3 years old. Not to say he's approving of my hikki habits - Just like any normal human being would be, he's always trying to get me to come out of my shell. But he's a pretty awkward guy, and it comes out clumsily. I appreciate it immensely, but I sure as hell don't deserve it, though, and it makes me feel like shit, how he can be that overlooking regarding all my faults.

It's all very weird.

Anyway, I just deal with it if/when I'm forced to socialize. I mean, when you've got a free ride like most hikkis, if they're not ice-cold to you, then you have no right to complain if your family wants you to spend time with them. But if they're assholes, then screw them, because that's just unnecessary considering.

My mum tells everyone she meets what a shut-in loser I am, so by the time I meet them they've already formed the opinion that I'm a slightly retarded manchild.
The worst is when my mum's friends bring over their children who are my age. Everyone acts overly nice and condescending, as though they thnk I'll start flinging faeces at them if they ask me anything more complicated than how my day was

>>9359
My family isn't very up front cold to me. But their positivity towards me is occasionally so see through and fake. I can see the anger and hatred towards me for just being me behind their smiles, it always shows through. I avoid spending too much time with a lot of them since that's all that ever happens. I have some family members I come to like a bit just because I do things with them almost every weekend and though they get angry at me I'm just happy they don't always put up a fake attitude towards me.

>>9361
Most of my mothers friends know me because of my mother talking about me so much with them but they have no kids my around my age (I'm 19). She spreads so much bullshit lies about me to them like she thinks she knows me when she doesn't know shit about me. In fact she is in her own little fantasy world of denial about me and she acts surprised that I'm such a self destructive piece shit who can't do much of anything anymore.

Like a ghost.

So as of today, for 2 weeks maybe a little more I'm a forced hiki because of a very bad foot injury that leaves me unable to walk very far for the time being (deep slice between 2nd and 3rd toe, luckily nothing major was hit). I can almost only leave my room for simply going to bathroom and even that's a struggle. How do you guys live like this? I hated my life before but this is just unbearable. Every minute feels like an hour and I just wanna sit in a corner and cry because of this in combination with how helpless and miserable I was before. It makes me feel how fucked beyond repair my life is and forces it down my throat every second. I know you guys don't have a messed up foot like me here but it probably doesn't feel much different since it doesn't even hurt unless I put pressure on it from walking which I can't do much of. I really feel the full extent of the power of depression right now like I have never felt it before. Ranting here on and on about won't do anything and the most anyone can do is pat me on the back and say it's ok anywhere I go but I'm just so desperate and hopelessly lost in my life right now. Realizations that I'll never see the light of happiness and satisfaction even when I'm back to normal. I'll never feel the touch of another human except in a hospital or mental home later in life if something really drives me over the edge. I'll always be a lonely train wreck. No amount of tears will save me so it's best I don't cry for my own good. I'll never speak to another human I can even call anything more than friend. I also realized the only times I ever been happy lately is if I've been high, every other time I'm just like this except with the thought "well it could always be worse" in my head constantly. And now it is but it only grows more problems on top of the previous and grows them.

>>9393
Now you know why I wake up every morning disappointed that...well...that I woke up.

>>9407
Yes I see, on top of that this going to make me feel more bloated and ugly by the end of it all than I ever felt in my life. I find it very strange that now my dreams are all happy and bright but I hate them even more than being ok and having nightmares every night. I then wake up and feel trapped again.

i try to talk as little as i can, maintain a flat affect, and try not to look pathetic
people still treat me like i am retarded or a naive child
maybe i am retarded or a naive child

>>9418
Mostly like me, I just try and act like I'm not here at all, bring a bunch of food into my room and leave just to go to the bathroom. If I am out almost everyone also thinks I'm retarded or something. Well since I can't do anything right that would actually be useful to me for living on my own or have the communication skills to be lasting friends with anyone IRL I probably am. I don't even care, I'm forever a child living in some delusional fantasy world till something kills me. I just can't be anything else.

>>9419
>I'm forever a child living in some delusional fantasy world till something kills me. I just can't be anything else.

Yep. The only thing that is going to get me out of the place I am now is my or my parents' death. Hopefully mine since I will probably go insane with grief if my parents die

My dads friend keeps trying to get me to play online games with him... I haven't played any online game normal people would find appeal in for any stretch of time in ages.

Any time hes over it feels so awkward and weird since he tries talking to me about the new star wars mmo and computers in general but I can't converse with him very well because he doesn't know what hes talking about with computers which leaves me in not wanting to call him out on it and seem like an ass. Typically I just tell him whatever I think is needed to get him to shut up and leave me alone.

>>9480
I have issues like that with some people too. People that think they know you and try to be nice but it just comes off as rather insulting. Mostly with just family members for me, friends of family members hardly know I exist thankfully. To most that don't live in my house, they think all I do is play video games or use the compute. While the computer part may be right for the most part, I hardly even play much games but whenever they see me I usually am. So some of them always ask me if I got any new games or they talk to me about all these new games coming out and all I can do is say ok because I have no clue what they're talking about and they probably don't themselves since it's like they are trying to talk down to me or something. My mom and dad know a little more about me, like they think that I like a lot of shit from Japan in general and where I like to shop sometimes online and off. They probably know a bit more about me but they don't like it so they are in complete denial. Most of what I order online besides music I keep hidden from them for obvious reasons (personal sex toys and shit like that because I'm a sexually frustrated lonely loser). I think if they knew all of what I ordered online, I would probably be on my way to the mental hospital with them because it would then be confirmed how much issues I have.

>>9480
Stop being an asshole. The guy is trying to be nice, gentle to a person that is clearly a social retard like you and myself. Be kind to him. He doesn't want to talk to you, he wants to HELP you.

>>9497
Maybe he doesn't want to be helped and to be left alone?
How does that make him a asshole?
I know I sure as fuck wouldn't want the guy's 'help' in that situation.

>>9497
Excuse me, but it appears that you are on the wrong site. Please go somewhere else.

People who don't realize you can't 'help' someone who do not wish for help, can be bad. It's blind and forced sympathy, invoked on a basis irrelevant to empathic virtues. It's also cowardly to dodge direct confrontation, and try to appeal to generic, non-targeted interests without proper insight. Such behavior will be conceived as provoking. Even in best-case scenario you're left with the problem that "you can lead a horse to the water, but you can't force it to drink of it". At this point it's a matter of respecting your peers.

>>9497

I'd rather he just leave me alone, every time I've had a "friend" I know in real life its always ended poorly. Its better for both me and him that I keep to myself.