be as dismissive as possible without being outright rude

>without looking like an homophobe?
What does this have to do with anything. Just tell her she's being annoying.

>>7715

>but a couple of weeks ago this girl(trap) joined.

does girl(trap) mean they're male or female?

Just say that you are happy as you are and that she is being a bit rude to force her morals onto you, and then politely continue working together.

>>7716
I know what he said. He's being meta-homophobic; i.e., trying too hard not to be homophobic so he doesn't get accused of being homophobic. No one would consider that was even a factor if he hadn't brought it up.

This is one of the reasons why I am terrified of getting a job. I can't even stand the "oh what are you doing?" questions during family things

I'd just answer HIM like what he is: a co-worker man (be it politely, indiferent at a personal level or whatever). If I treated him as a woman... well I just wouldn't treat her at all; I'd just fully ignore her or send her away, like with any other woman.

Post edited on 22nd Oct 2011, 10:48pm

Quick, short, and direct replys when needed.
Ignore them if the question they ask requires a reply of more then two words.

"Why don't you ever talk?": No reply
"Do you have a 3DPD?": "No" or "not interested"
When they ask why not: no reply.

sooner or latter they'll get sick of dealing with you.
extroverted people just take longer.

At one of my old jobs there was a happy extroverted type guy that found it upsetting I never smiled, and he seemed deturmed to get me to talk more.
skip ahead a month latter, he's show up, do his thing, and leave, without us trading a single word.

Don't give them something to talk to you about, don't appear interested in talking with them, and don't give them an opening.

>"Do you have a 3DPD?": "No" or "not interested"
Error here is that a lot of gay (or questioning) men will ask this (and with either answer) will assume that you are gay.

Post edited on 22nd Oct 2011, 11:06pm

>"Why don't you ever talk?"
Nothing to talk about.

>"Do you have a 3DPD?"
I have more important things to worry about to need a commitment in my life.

Granted, everyone who knows me knows I have no intention of marrying.
Just be vague or just pull the slightly jerkish "It's really none of your business" card.

>>7725
That is kinda sad, I feel bad for the dude.

It is certainly uncomfortable, but she'll give up after some time like everyone else.

"Nothing special" is my answer for what I did over the weekend. If they keep asking for me to explain what I do, I just try to dismiss it with something like "I won't bore you with the details" or "In my experience, people aren't interested in hearing me ramble on about it".

As far as looking like a homophobe (transphobe?), the only thing you can really do is not treat her differently (i.e. display the same unsocial attitude towards everyone). There won't be any "evidence" of prejudice that way. That being said, some people are used to being treated differently, so they see the world through the lens of "normals hate me" (for their standards of normal/self) and might still assume that's what you're doing. In that case, it's out of your hands, but your supervisors should be able to understand that you treat everyone the same so I wouldn't think anything would come from it.

>>7729

You really shouldn't. I hate how normals treat their work places like places to hang out with their buddies. You are there to work, not talk about bullshit. Fuck, just remembering it makes me angry.

>>7726

Well it's hard if you are gay to exactly come right out and ask if somebody else has the same sexual orientation but being forward with people in such a fashion isn't the right way to approach it anyway.

>>7713
How convincing a trap are they? They can't exactly be perfect or you wouldn't have noticed, I know GID is legit but I'll admit people in transition still have the effect of making me a little uncomfortable.

Just ignore the guy. Being a guy in a dress doesn't entitle him to any special treatment. If you don't acknowledge his existence anymore than you do everyone else he'll get bored and go away.

>"Why don't you ever talk?"

Haha, I remember hearing this question when I went to school.

I'd always say: "I don't feel like it.", and they'd (usually) leave me alone. Sometimes, though, a few people would feel the need to interrogate me on this, but they'd give up as soon as they realized that I was boring and had nothing to offer.

OP, are you a dude?

>>7726
Yeah but why should we care what people think of us?
They're just gonna think you're some creepy loaner at the end of the day anyway.
What difference does it make? It's not like we're looking for a girl(or boy)friend anyway.

>>7737
the trap may hit on the OP. And OP is probably transphobic.

>>7746
AMERICA, FUCK YEAH!

In all seriousness, I laughed a little too hard at that.

>>7731

People like us aren't exactly normal though. Most of us want other to simply leave us be, to varying degrees. If they're hellbent on seeing everything through the victim lens than it's even more worth avoiding them.

I would just answer the questions with very simple yes and no answers but be blunt with the answers and make yourself busy afterwards.

>>7770
Yes, but "normal" is relative to the person who considers themselves abnormal, is what I meant. Other outside groups have their own definitions.

Just tell her what she wants to know? Also think about reasons why you enjoy the things you do and come to a confident stance on those matters you care about. Confident, not closed minded.

>>7784
He's not trying to hit on her here, He's trying to get her to leave him alone.
Confidence in honestly answering everything she asks is the worst possible thing he could do.
She'll either become more interested in him, or make things hard for him at work by spreading information about him to other employees.

>>7785
>She'll either become more interested in him
well if she cares about his hobbies, why not. no need to become friends or anything more.
the point is to be able to deal with people and not feel terrible about it.

>make things hard for him at work by spreading information about him to other employees
If that's a realistic scenario then my advice is really terrible, sorry.

Post edited on 1st Nov 2011, 1:16pm

>>7787
>the point is to be able to deal with people
Some of us hate people and don't want to to deal with them, or learn to deal with them, but maybe that's just me (people are all shit, eveyone, every last person is grade-a shit!)
and yeah, people love to spread gossip and rumors in the work place like you wouldn't believe.

>>7803
if you dont want to learn how to deal with people why make a thread about it?

>>7805
I didn't make the thread.
But my guess is, OP wants to be left alone by those people around him.

Thanks for the replies guys. When no one was around I ended up telling him/her to stop talking to me, in the most polite way that I could.

She did, but now she pokes me and tries to startle me from behind.
I don't get 3d people.

>>7807
People these days have the mentality of children. Now if you told her to stop touching you she would probably start waving her hands around you saying "not touching you na na na"

>>7784
Wouldn't this just reveal more of your personality, worldview, and insecurities, making it easier for people to make more pointed judgments, insults, ridicule, etc.?

Some people just cannot be reasoned with. The best I can advise is to try not lose your temper.

>>7811
Yes, that why it is flawed and useless "advice".

The whole "Don't give them something to talk to you about, don't appear interested in talking with them, and don't give them an opening." is the best advice in this thread.

>>7813
Which is flawed in itself, because it wont improve the situation.

>>7814
Not as flawed as the other method. Ignoring the existence of a person can do alot more than trying to be all buddy buddy with an annoying ass.

With the information provided, it sounds like OP is dealing with the average Gaia user, so most normal methods will prove to be unsuccessful as they're all mentally retarded. I'm sure that the average ▇▇▇▇ user is probably even more retarded at this point, but that's up to further investigation.

>>7815
A gaia poster wouldnt make op's work life miserable though. That's like saying 4chan makes troll lives miserable.
In the end op could do about anything reasonable and it'd bear similar results. Don't be so self righteous.
Though OP might prefer your way, I do not know, nor does it matter.

Even the most dense idiots will eventually get the hint if you ignore them long enough.

But as for the whole childish poking and trying to scare you thing, If it's something you really can't ignore, I'd recomded hiding a camera in the work place, once you have it on film, file a harassment case against her, but don't say anything to her about it, let her boss be the one to say something.
You'll need proof becuase no one will ever take a guy seriously without it, and if you threaten her with it or tell her you're going to do it, she'll just say you were the one doing it to her, and they will always take the woman's side and believe her without the need for proof.
It's sexist, discriminatory and fucked up, but it's how things are, and it's either that or put up with it.

>>7818
>A gaia poster wouldn't make op's work life miserable though.
You ever meet one?
They're just as stupid and annoying offline as online.

>>7820
I wouldn't be surprised.

>>7713
Here's how: "Look, I'm sorry but I just want to keep to myself and get back to work. Please leave me be." in a polite tone. If he/she still bothers you, than you have something to complain about and may get backing from others: people are odd like that.

I don't mind extroverted people. In fact, I'm quite happy for them. I'm glad they can do what I can't. If I feel like talking with them, I do, if I don't I don't, and eventually they get it.

Try seeing it this way: At least the man/woman cares enough to try. Some asshats would just say you were an anti-social misfit and scoff at you.

Sorry for the long winded post.

>>7807
Ah, just saw this post.

Well, here's what you do: This person seems genuinely nice. Really, she'll still probably stop if you talk to her and explain why you don't want her too. If you tell people like this "I want to be left alone" enough, they'll get it.

Also here's a wild thought: try being a tad friendly with her. Trust me on this: I doubt a transvestite is going to judge you on much. And if they do, you have every right to tell them to fuck off.

>Ideas on how to deal with very extroverted people?
Just be polite to them when you need to, but keep your distance. If you act rude and blow them off completely, it can sometimes have the wrong effect. If you are polite but quickly shut down every conversation, they will take the hint and just give up.

>>7811
yes, but believe it or not there are also good things that can come from a human relationship. ever hear of the hedgehog's dilemma?

>>7864
doesnt sound like anything good could come of this relationship

>>7864
No, take your 3DPD and fuck off.

>>7864
shut up shinji

>>7820
Yes, I knew several gaiafags. They're not as bad as you think.

>>7945
Indeed. They're even worse than most people think.

>>7954
This.