My dad was in the US Navy until 2005. We would move every 1-2 years to wherever my father got orders to move. I never really got too attached to the friends that I made because either I would move out of state or switch schools at the end of the school year, or my friends would move away because they had a parent in the military. I never stayed in contact with my friends in civilian families, same deal with the ones in military families, aside from the rare contact between my parents and the few families they managed to stay in contact with over the years. I'd imagine that if I were to somehow personally get in contact with any of them, just about all of them wouldn't remember me. I also had some anger issues when I was younger, which made it harder for me to keep most of my friends and it made me an easy target for me to be picked on.

I thought things would finally change when I entered high school in the same year my dad retired from the navy, with my parents finally settling down and buying a house and not having to worry about what part of the country, or perhaps the world, we would be sent to next, I thought I'd finally be able to have a stable social life for once. But the problems I had throughout my life persisted, and halfway through high school I gave up on trying to fit in and started to slowly drift away from most social tendencies. I managed to make a few friends towards the end, but any relationships I had back then were quite distant. They all ended up going off to colleges in far flung parts of the country after graduation, and I became more and more of a social recluse. I can't even remember most of their names now.

As I told somebody recently when they asked me if I had difficulty making new friends after I mentioned that I moved around a lot as a military child; "Making new friends is easy, keeping them is hard".

Just a general distaste for non-imaginary people, I guess. I don't know whether I qualify as full-blown ronery, though.

I've always been ronery.

Well, I had friends at one point in my life, but that was during my very last semester of high school. We got along pretty well and shared a lot of common ground, but by then it was too late for anyone to really get to know me.

I bet that if I had gotten the chance to meet these people during my freshman year or earlier, I would be a lot happier.

Nothing.

Well, to start with, I was always the fatty, even after I got thinner. But the problem didn't stop there. I had about five friends, but I was always the black sheep of the gang, the weird creature among them, and that was fine by me. They wanted me to either become like them or to pretend to be someone I'm not, and, since I refused to do that, I was discarded from their pure world. If only by being alone I can be who I want to, that's fine. I don't even care if they hate me, I'll do my best to help our world in my own way. I'll always be lurking, even if I have to move to the darkness. Unneeded people such as me are what keeps the earth spinning.

My dad always worked abroad. He worked on a ship that crossed the Atlantic and the Pacific for months. Then worked as a butcher in some obscure country, trying to make a living. He eventually got promoted and we went on to live in that country. You can guess what happened. You don't know the language, you don't know anyone, you don't know the customs. You don't know anything. People are unfriendly as hell to you because you're a stranger. I still hate this stupid language even to this day (15 years I'm here) and I can't stand the people here. I can't stand the shitty weather, I can't stand the shitty food. I hate every single thing about this country, the only thing this fucking country has is money.

I always think back, that if I hadn't left my home country maybe I would have become something (school was and still is a horror).

It was moving in 8th grade to a new city for high-school. That's where it began, at least - It was like all of my motivation and optimism just slid right out of me. Even when my best/only friend 'followed' me (his grandparents had a house in the city I moved to, coincidentally, so he moved there), I still felt drained of almost everything.
Because of that weird, drained feeling, I always used to remind myself that "nothing is here to stay" whenever something crappy happened, but I soon started applying that philosophy to good situations, and as such, descended in a spiral of bitterness and cynicism.

I guess, at the root of it, the start of my roneriness was the idea that "everything is impermanent" combined with the fact that it seemed, to me, that every single person around me appeared to be progressing, moving forward, while I was being left behind.

I was never sociable. My parents never encouraged me to be. I've never lost friends in my life, because I've never had one.

It wasn't until middle school when I fully realized how socially crippled I was. And knowing that only increased my social anxiety.

I've also used the internet for most of my life. Hanging out on forums as a fucking pre-teen, pretending to be older than I was. So I always felt more of a connection to strangers on the internet than anyone in real life.

My story, if you can call it that, is really boring. Sometimes I wish I had a better one, something to use as an excuse at least.

Definitaly failling at my life's goal. Wanting to compensate my sick mother's past suffering, thus staying at home to make her company. Starting to study philosophy. Recreational social life gradually unveilled as utterly boring and idiotizing. General dissapointment with sexuality (functional impotence). Grudge and disdain against actual women. Growing suspicion about all forms of close interpersonal relationships. Growing fear of the actual world. Growing disdain against the actual world. Embracing of art. Embracing of virtuality. Embracing of an existence dump towards the field of ideas. Gorgeous anime girls ...

TL;DR Emo-SAMO.

>>3827
Oh! but was it really nothing or the nothing...?

I thought I was ronery. Then I realized I just generally hate people in general. I don't know if that counts as ronery or not, but I guess it counts more as bitter.

>>3837
Quiet rock I don't don't need your metaphors

>>3819
I wouldn't say I'm ronery.

I just disregard 3D for the pure 2D that is mai waifu Nodoka-san. <3

>>3832
which country did you come from, and which country do you live in now.