It was shit, I'm glad to be an adult

My Dad had a heartattack and was in the hospital for a while when I was 11, but I can't remember it at all.

I can remember parts very very clearly almost like if it was a movie and the memories haven't changed, at least as far as I know, and they're consistent with facts and what other people tell me so they're probably real.
Can remember as far as being 3 years old.
Not everything but some events or parts, if I think hard enough I can undust other parts.
Though usually I like to keep the memories away and hidden.

I can't remember anything of my life before I was 14 or so.

Aside from the most basic details, I can't remember much of my life before I was 11.

Then again, my life then was pretty boring, so those "basic details" would probably sum the whole thing up.

Protip: when people get older, they forget things.

To be honest, I can't even remember much from a year ago.

I can remember what classes I had, and what kind of games I played/anime I watched, but I can't picture any of it or any specific events.

Time just seemed to pass much slower. Traveling by car with my family, afternoons playing with action figures, days at the beach, nights of sleep - all seemed to last forever.

I remember most things down to about 10 years old. Anything before that is just a blur.

My childhood, and even recent life are a blur to me, I can very vaguely see the big picture, but everything else tends to be a blur to me. Alas what I remember of it.

When I was young I was a very sheltered child, I'd very rarely see other kids due to my parents always being too busy to bring over anyone for me to play with. When I did get social interaction it'd be odd. When I entered school I wound up being bullied due to being the "quiet kid" when I did manage to make friends my parents would keep me from being friends with them "because I don't know their parents" yeah, in a school of ~500 kids you're going to know everyones parents. Real big fucking opportunities for me to make friends, life was rigged from the start to be shit for me. I did eventually make one friend but my parents constantly voiced their displeasure with him because "hes not right" we stayed friends even into my teenage years, mainly because we both shared interests in video games but as time went on we started changing and quit talking as much after he moved away, until we quit talking at all and I haven't heard back from him ever, and to be honest I'm afraid to meet up with him as he was getting more normal at the time we drifted apart. For some reason I occasionally entertain the thought of what a relationship with him would have been like (we are both guys) I believe I've came to do so because I feel like I betrayed him, and since he was the only 'stable' friend I ever have had that hasn't been met online I push off some sort of idealistic model onto him. I also think if I had some sort of relationship with someone I could get along with that I'd be much happier, someone I could trust and lean on. Due to this I spent a time when I was a teenager desperately trying to get a 3DPD. Now I just wish I'd go crazy so its (and several other things) not a bother to me or find a waifu that I could be content with, but I'm yet to find a character that matches what I would want in a relationship. I digress on this part now however.

I had other friends, they were never really stable, and by that I mean that they were either the "we talk to eachother at school and stuff" or they fell apart horribly within the maximum of one year. At one point in my life a while before me and my only good friend ever were friends I tried the whole religion thing to mend my life, all I got was empty promises and my life ending up more miserable trying to get on the "right path in life". I also got suckered into a christfag highschool for the remainder of it before I ragequit and got my GED which hasn't helped my feelings on religion at all. Right now I'm in college and beggining on what is destined to be a downward slope of failing out, my first semester I failed a class and this semester I dropped two before I failed them, and if I don't pass the two I'm in currently I'll be fucked financial aid wise. One is a joke of a class, the other one I'm not doing too well in. I'm trying to find a steady job that I won't hate doing (unlikely) and just quit alltogether, but I don't see that happening, when I do flunk out and can't find one I'll probably just kill myself. Although I could try and get on benefits, my parents would frown upon it from their half moral crusader/half drunk personality and be less likely to help me when I still do need them, as if I get a job and/or benefits I plan on cutting them out of my life entirely once I have the means to support myself, they've fucked me over enough in life already, I'm not keeping them around to open the possibility for it to happen more once I have the chance.

>>2898
For what it's worth, it doesn't sound like you betrayed your friend at all, just like the two of you mutually drifted apart, which happens to everyone. It's not like he tried to contact you and you ignored him or anything.

I can still remember kindergarten and such. Most of it is blurry sure, but I remember looking at the clock at the time and wanting to go home to play Super Mario 64. Then, when my mommy asked if I had a good day at school, I'd lie and say "yeah".

When I turned 8, I began to dwell on the fact that life was shit and things used to be better. So, that's probably why most of my memories are depressing and somewhat strong.

Dissociative symptoms can be the result of child abuse but I wouldn't suspect abuse just because you don't remember your childhood very well.

Wowowowowwo
Are you fucking ME OP!!?

Becasue shet, I was just thinking in this things a few months ago, and since I realised I have no memories from below 17, I started a diary on word. Not everyday, just like once a month or somethin. But I dont wanna forget who I am at this age, because if I don't write who i am now, then on my 25 I'll ask myself "Who the fuck i was at 20? I cant remember well"

I mean, I can remeber shit from before 17. But I can't remember from MY point of view. Its like I see that memories from the outside, like I see what i was doing at that age, but just can't see the inner me.
Well sorry for my engrish, working on that, I know I know...

>>2902
Also, Inb4 underage&ban, I'm 20.

Same here, I only remember a few random little bit's and peaces, when my parents talk of my childhood, it's almost as if they're talking about another person, a person who is a real dick apparently.
I always figured it was a combination of being knocked around alot by my dad, and repressed memories, I wasn't abused, not sexually..
lately though, as in the last few years, I have a hard time remembering what I did ten minutes ago.
I can barely remember what I did last week.. but I guess that's what happens when each day is no different then the last, when stuck in room no bigger then a prison cell all day everyday, time melts away and the days become a blur.

>>2906
Drop the weed buddy.

I seem to be the odd one here. I do remember my childhood fairly well. I suppose it is because it was the only happy time in my life. Everyday now is the same. I honestly can't believe how old I am now.

>>2907
Never touched the stuff in my life, I know that much at least.

I don't really remember many things. Here is a summary of what I remember about my life, feel free to skip it.

I remember that, back when I was 5, my dad taught me how to ride a bicycle and I fell repeatedly for two weeks before finally learning it (I've since worked on my bad sense of balance). This episode is curious because it is isolated. Next memory I have is when I'm six, and I'm learning how to read. A teacher says "So, let's start with a simple one" and I say "C-A-R". I remember that I used to be very diligent. I was also quite smart for my age. I wrote my first short story back when I was 7. Generic shit about some dark hero breaking into a graveyard and digging the graves to find a new world, full of sugar and candy and dark things like him. My mom became quite worried about the "dark themes", though. I was also very pampered, however I hated it. I kept saying "If you spoil me too much, I'll become a problem adult!". Seems like I was right, heh. When I was about ten, I had this memorable birthday party. All my friends came and I made a couple true friends that are my bros to this date. I got a PlayStation from my parents, and some games from my guys. I also met a girl that seems to be some kind of distant relative or something, actually it seems like it was not the first time I've met her. It's kind of hazy... I do remember playing Yu-Gi-Oh for the first time by then. I would become a Magic nerd next year. When I became 11, I kept a diary for about two months but then quickly lost interest on it. Some old entries show a (bad) pikachu drawing and some pokemon and magic strategies. I also wrote a "letter for me five years in the future", that I've opened when I was 16. It had some silly things like "has my handwriting improved" and "has anna kissed me" (by 16 I had already lost all my interest in 3DPD). By 12, the only memorable thing I have is that I've changed schools for the first time. It was a bit traumatic. By 13 I came back to my old school. It was then that I met the first person that genuinely fascinated me, not as in love/sex but as in interest. Now this I remember very clearly. She was a girl that spoke funny and knew many things about philosophy, however she tried to kill herself two times and then, when I was 14, she moved to another state (I've never known where). We once had a very meaningful conversation with each other that I can recite word by word. All my life since then has been me striving to become like her. By 15 I led a vague life, I had always been an honor student by sheer inertia however I've started reading some books such as Camus' The Stranger and Kafka's Metamorphosis. By 16 I led pretty much the same life, and after that I remember pretty much everything quite clearly. Maybe I should go talk to a psychologist. I do have one idiosyncrasy: I can remember faces perfectly. If I see someone I last met when I was four, I will recognize it (this has already happened earlier this year, I've met a guy that played with me when I was 7).

I remember a lot of stuff from my childhood

I can actually remember learning how to walk.

I can remember the moment I realized how to tie my shoes , it was in a ymca near a swimming pool.

I remember the first time my parents where trying telling me about god, I was a really little kid, I think I was around 4 or 5, they told me he lived in the sky and I remember asking them that if you shot a gun in the sky would it hit him, I don't remember how they answered that question.

I remember in prekindergarten learning what a square and triangle was, and trying to conceptualize what a shape with more than four sides would like look like.

I remember learning how to add, I remember in kindergarten the teacher having this big poster that featured an addition table. I remember learning how to write my own name. I remember the very moment I was writing it down on the piece of paper the teacher gave me.

I remember my first snickers candy bar,i remember my mother buying it at the grocery store and the ride home, I was amazed on the various layers it had and I wanted to dissect and study it like a “scientist” when I got home, alas the temptation was too much and I ate it before getting home.

I remember my grandma dying and my father trying to explain to me what death was.

I remember the very moment I was able to read words, the first word I was able to read was "first" in my first day of first grade (heh), it was a eureka moment for me, in kinder garden I was learning about vowels and consonants and at the very day I learned how to put them together, it was amazing to me up to that point I regarded reading as some sort of mystical power adults had.

I remember the first time going to a golden corral, I didn't want to go, I wanted to stay home and work on my “time machine”. Oh yeah that was the same year I watched back to the future.

I can remember the very moment I was learning to multiply, it was in 2nd grade and I was using my fingers to grasp the concept.

I remember figuring out that 50 times 50 was 2500, I thought doing that was the coolest shit ever.

I remember my first game console was a sega genesis and my first video game was sonic 2, I remember working on getting a lot of lives only to lose most of them in a cave stage because of those moving rocks that looked like poop and crushed me so many times, I remember I could never get pass that stage where you are on that giant airship.

I remember moving to a new town in the third grade not being able to make friends and not having any friends until my sophomore year of high school. My parents where always on my ass about making friends.

I remembered the schoolyard rumbles I had as a kid, I remember taking out another kid by kicking him in the stomach. I remember another kid had me pinned to the ground trying to make me eat dirt and I managed to get the upper hand when I got a hold of one of his fingers and started twisting it. I remember getting my ass kicked by these three kids, I don't remember the beating itself but I remember hurting all over afterwards.

I remember the first time I watched power rangers, it was in my aunts house, I remember growing tired of it and then liking it again once they introduced the gold ranger.

I remember seeing my dad installing a new processor on our computer, it was in the evening in the garage while the garage door was open. He let me install the fan on it, that was the first time I used a screw driver.

I remember the first game I played on the computer, it was some blockbuster Hollywood game or something.

Hell I even remember dreams I had as a kid, one of my most memorable ones is when I was six I dreampt about being in a robot suit fighting a xenomorph while on a Martian colony, it was a kickass dream.

I remember my first beer, I was 6 at my uncles house and I told him I was really thirsty he gave me a sip of beer. It was a Budweiser.

I remembered being fascinated by fire and wanting to play with matches.

I remember the first omelet I made, it was at a family friend's house and I was 11 at the time.I also lit my first barbecue put at that house.

I remember the first time I used a lawn mower, for some reason my father felt the need to videotape it.

I remember the first video I saw on the computer was a monkey drinking its own pee.

I remember the switch from windows 3.1 to 95 and being confused about the whole task bar business and really not liking it.

I remember my favorite program for a while was cakewalk which I got from a floppy disk.

I remember being able to first access the Internet, the isp was america online.

I remember trying to learn how to program when i saw a book on pascal from school. naturally my first program was "hello world"

I remember my first chat room and being very confused as to why the question of age sex location was asked every two minutes.

I remember playing civilization call to power and always rushing to build the forbidden city wonder so I could focus on growth and technology instead of military and also rushing to get the emancipation proclamation and star ladders wonders cause I really liked the movies.

I remember as a kid talking to my dad about napster, I said that maybe one day they could do the same thing with movies, he called me silly.

I remembered the first bach song I heard was Brandenburg Concertos No.3

I can remember as a kid seeing the word prostitute and then later asking my mother what a prostitute was, she was quite flustered by the question. I even remember where I saw that word, it was on a website where the guy said the great faeries from ocarina of time(64) looked like prostitutes.

I remember all the times as a kid where I would watch bill nye the science guy.

I remember using the netscape browser, I remember using altavista to search for videos.

I remember all those geocities anime shrine sites, and anime turnpike.

I remembered when that episode of the Simpson's aired about homosexuality, and my parents having a talk with me and my sister if we understood what the word gay meant, we didn't.

I remember my dad explaining to me how a cd works.

I remember watching tech tv with my dad, I miss tech tv.

I remember my first exposer to quantum physics was through a book about the origin of the universe, it was an great book full of these illustrations that amazed me, that’s when I became interested in physics. Funny thing about that book , a chunk of it was in German while the rest was in English I never understood that.

I remember reading a book about the elements and learning the difference between uranium 235 and 238.

I remember in elementary and middle school spending most of my time during recess reading books.


holy shit I didn't intend write this much, it just kind of snowballed with this serious nostalgia blast.

I'm the opposite. I recall my childhood quite well. I remember almost every little thing that happened, even way before I entered kindergarten. I have memories of when I was 1 or 2. Most of it is not good, but I remember it all nonetheless.

But my memory isn't good. Not at all. I can barely remember what happened in the last 6-10 years. Maybe even a bit prior to that is kind of blurry. It's like my memory is gradually getting worse. Sometimes I can't even remember what I ate in the day/week. Or sometimes I go through small moments where I can't remember what happened (if I walk into a room and it's a mess I might freak out from not being able to recall why the room is the way it is), or sometimes I can't even recall who I am or why I am where I am. Shit's awful. Thankfully the more extreme episodes of forgetfulness don't happen often.

>>2969
This sounds pretty interesting. You mean you actually remember only really old things well? I do have (rare) episodes of forgetfulness, but my childhood is made of fragments. Sometimes I just stop everything and wonder why am I doing this. However, everything that's about two years old is easy to remember for me.

>>2978
>You mean you actually remember only really old things well?
Sort of. It's more like my brain gave up on me around when high school hit and my memory just stopped recording as many events. Even as time passes, my memory of high school doesn't get better or return, it stays sort of a blur, with me only able to remember few events. Every passing year since, things just become more and more of a blur. I don't even really remember what I did last year. The last "defining" memory I have was of 2 years ago. I'll probably forget everything that happened within the last couple months within a couple months (whatever I do remember at least).

If anyone ever asks me "remember when..." I honestly never remember or how to reply to it. They seem offended when I say "no".

I can remember stuff from video games better than things in my real life. I remember almost everything about HM64 (a game I once played literally all summer) but I can't remember anything about, say, 4th grade.

The only thing I seem to have a good memory for is past social fuckups and embarrassments. They became "intrusive thought" memories for awhile.

I used to be completely unable to remember things like what I had for dinner the previous night. I remember once being asked by my doctor about my diet (was an obese teenager) and being unable to come up with anything.

My memory is better now (less depressed) but I barely remember anything from my childhood. The memories I do have are mostly bad ones I guess.

I don't even remember video games or other escapes (my life, always), except an operational kind where I'll remember what comes next as I'm playing or watching it.

Although reading through some of the posts makes me think, "oh yeah, I remember something similar. "

My childhood was good while I was oblivious to what people thought of me. I have good memories up until I was about 11-12. Then I guess around the onset of puberty I started to come to some realizations, and my life was shitty from that point until I stopped caring about my public image maybe 1-2 years ago (that was a whole long process too.) Those years were pretty bad, and I've tried and mostly succeeded in pushing them out of my mind. I could still recall memories of those years if I wanted to, but naturally I don't.

>>3007

Wow, are you me?

Not many memories from childhood, most of them sad, other than the one where I'm in this big toy truck and... that's it, probably my earliest memorie, I'd guess I was 4 or so then.

Holidays are mostly a blank for me,I kinda remember they being boring because it'd entail socializing with people, which I've always been bad at.

I'd probably recognize the faces of some kids and maybe their personality, but otherwise not many memories of them other than the bad ones.

I can't remember shit before my third year or so of high school, so I would of been around 13/14. All I did all day when I came out of school was play video games. And my life up to that point had also been the same, so I guess I can only remember high school because I was depressed then.

I don't remember much about my childhood life either, but that's because I buried those memories willingly. The more I look to the past, the more embarrassing it gets.

I have only one memory of before I was 7 and very few before about age 12 or so. I think probably some of it comes from the fact that my brother died, but I sometimes wonder if it is a sign of mental illness. My sister claims she can clearly remember being a toddler, which just seems increadable to me.

I have a hilarious photo of me taken during my first year of kindergarden. I have my arms crossed, no smile and I'm basically saying FUCK OFF with my eyes. It's great. I'd post it here but I don't want my face online.

>>3187
I doubt you'd keep the same face, though. Skin cells are always being replaced, you have likely lost all the biological material that was recorded in the picture unless you're still a kid.

On the topic of memories - does anyone feel like their memories are fake sometimes? I often get confused over real memories and thoughts, thinking they're fake, only to find out they're actually real later on. Which of course eases me, but questioning a definite reality is sort of psyching me out.

Or is this getting sort of off-topic?

>>3342
I think I know what you mean. Sometimes I just feel kinda detached from my own memories, like I was watching something that's happening to someone that looks like me, and they want me to believe that it was really me. It's a bit creepy, to be honest.

>>3342
No.

I don't remember anything from 5-7 years old.
I have vaguest memories of 4-5 and of after 7, but that time between is almost non-existent.

I hated my childhood. I was a loner and would often get mistaken for a girl. My parents thought I was depressed when I was around 14.

I don't remember a much about my childhood. The strongest memories are of video games (Megaman X for my SNES being one of them).

I remember many things from my childhood but I don't hold them dear at all. I don't hold anything dear anyways.

I have quite a lot of childhood memories. Not all of it is crystal clear but I do remember a lot of events and people and things that happened. My biggest problem is I'm really bad with putting together a time line in which things happened. I can remember kind of when things happened based around what I'd consider major events in my life but a lot of times I'll get the years and months confused.

I also seem to dwell on the past a lot when I get sick. I almost always remember another story or even after I've been sick in bed all day that I'd have thought was long forgotten. My parents also kept a lot of my elementary school projects and pictures and such. So when I help clean out the attic and such I end up looking through a lot of those things and it just sparks my memory.

My middle school life was so shitty that I'll never forget it and I remember too well my time spent there.

My high school life I remember my first two years fairly well. My last couple of years in High School are kind of a blur. I remember a lot of stories and events that happened but like it almost feels like those two years don't exist, maybe because I skipped a lot of school those two years. It's hard to explain.

Though I feel I've led a fairly exciting life and that's why I can remember so much. There's rarely ever a long boring gap in my memory.

I tend to forget everything about the past. I don't even remember the names, faces of my classmates, just the places. It's like I'm deliberately forgetting about people and the events that involve them but I always remember places, not what happened in those places unless they're really happy memories though.