Say It ain't So, joe, please say It ain't So.

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2619 No. 2619 [Edit]
I... I don't know where and how to begin. I'd like to call a spade a spade but in the end it's not that simple. Or maybe it actually is but at the same time it's so amazing that even [i]I[/i[ find it hard to believe.

The thing is, I believe we are blissfully lucky. Think about it. All these people out there, every single one of them, they all have to deal with all sorts of relationships. Not just the romantic kind - 'friendship' defnitely counts towards them, too, not to mention starting one's own family. Anger, sorrow, pain, betrayal, tears, double-guessing. Tons of 'invesments' - feelings, money and - most importantly - staggering amount of time. But what for? Is it really worth it? Are people made to seek companionship, no matter how shitty it might be? Is being alone that terrifying to them? Is our immunity to loneliness really this powerful?

I'm not saying we all live happy lives. In fact, I realize that most of us feel miserable for one reason or another. But at least we don't have to fear that other people will make our lives even worse. They won't expect anything out of us and we won't know the disappointment of someone not fulfilling our expecatations either. Maybe we're not living the lives we wish we did but at least it's not other people who make them miserable.

I'm not too sure whether the message I'm trying to convey will get across. If I had to do a tl;dr version of this post here I would simply have to write this: Being alone is really amazing. In a way, I'm grateful to all those 'friends' I had, as thanks to them now I can enjoy whatever I feel like doing without having to worry about others. Nobody can harm me and I won't harm anyone I care about. Thanks to that I'm right now I'm probably the happiest I've ever been in my life. Being alone is a really tiny price to pay for this sort of freedom.

Anyone with me on this one?
>> No. 2621 [Edit]
I get what you mean.

Basically I always though of 'being alone' as a way to hedge your bets. For example, if I set out to make friends and put my trust in a new acquantance, I could either find a great new friend or get hurt by a bad person. If I'm alone I don't get either. Another example: if I was so inclined, I could ask out a girl I liked. She could turn out to be a sweet, good girl, or she could be a bad girl who ends up hurting me. If I stayed at home and fapped to hentai instead, I avoid the risk but also deny myself the opportunity for something greater.

Does being alone grant freedom? Well, I basically think people have always been free, to make their own decisions in their own relationships. Its just that certain things become too valuable to them and they restrict themselves to maintain the status quo, and hence set up cages where there were no cages before.
>> No. 2623 [Edit]
Other people might be, but in my case, I get plenty of social interaction, and I'm perfectly happy (some health issues notwithstanding). I do well in school, everyone likes me, and I get along well with my family. I certainly don't believe everyone can have the same success I have, but you can be happy and free at the same time; it just comes down to some people are in the right situation for it, and some aren't. I never would have believed I'd be this happy in middle school, when my life really did suck.
>> No. 2624 [Edit]
I don't see it this way anymore. In the past I had exactly the same thoughts; I didn't want to get burned by "friends" like I had before. But now I really don't care about my feelings or the feelings of other people. I treat people however I feel like treating them and I don't worry about it, and I don't care how they treat me in return. The old me was terrified of doing anything lest I offend someone or give them a bad impression of me, but the current me can't be bothered to care.

The upside is that now I'm perfectly able to have smooth conversations with others (though I still have serious problems talking to "normal" people around my age.) The downside is that it's all an act, and I'm becoming emotionally dead. The only people I care for at all anymore are my parents and a few close family members. I have no feelings for my few old friends or even for myself. I don't know what to think of this.
>> No. 2625 [Edit]
>The only people I care for at all anymore are my parents and a few close family members. I have no feelings for my few old friends or even for myself.

I'm the same way, only without the friends part. I care more about my parents than myself, and if my mom ever needed an organ or something I would donate it in a heartbeat because I'd rather have me die than her
>> No. 2630 [Edit]
>>2619
Some of this lies true with conventional social psychological theories on relationships.

Basically, the absence of something bad is better than the presence of it.

This means, in regards to relationships, the being alone is better than being in the presence of negative, critical, or judgemental people.

On the contrary, however, being with encouraging and supporting people is much better than being alone.

So, in conclusion, people strive to make relationships so they can get support, encouragement, and appreciation. The prospect of getting these things is better than being alone for them, despite the fact that the process may be worse.
>> No. 2631 [Edit]
>>2624
It's all an act for me too. People looked at me as if I were pathetic when I showed that I was sad, lonely, or unhappy. So I pretend to be happy and cheerful out of fear of offending them.

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