They did, through my last couple years of high school it started with a little nagging and hinting that I should get a job. I couldn't balance school and a job at the same time, hell I couldn't even handle one at a time. After it ended over the Summer up to this point just made me file applications all over the place. I managed to get a job interview a couple times but the interviewers quickly saw how I was simply an "undesirable" and didn't take me. Now they some times get a little passive aggressive about it but besides that they don't even mention it to me anymore. Maybe they just realize I'm fucked and it doesn't matter what they do now. All they care about is me getting a job, the rest of my life as far as I can see they are not concerned with. Maybe because my personal life is so offensive and weird to them that they don't even want to know about me. I appreciate it since it's the only way for me to live.

I had NEET tendencies even before graduating primary school. I have a chronic disease that used to be quite bad and require a lot of treatment, so I could skip school a lot using it. I applied to secondary school, but only went there for about 16 weeks during the 3 years I was in their books - the disease helped there, too. Then I quit, and now I've been full-time NEET for a year after being part-time NEET (10 months NEET, some 2 months of education at most) for 3-4 years. My mother enables it, and from what I've gathered, she likes to believe that it can't be helped because of my disease.

>>12686 cont.
As for the reasons why, I guess my mother is something of a defeatist and unwilling to face hard things. Don't know if it was neglectful - at times, my condition actually was severe enough to warrant extended sick leave. I suppose when there's a diagnosis or two and papers from doctors saying I'm sick, it's easier to accept my NEET existence.

The only thing that gets me out of the house is college and during weekends I spend most of my free time working or enjoying Anime and video games if I am not to much behind my schedule. My parents are constantly pestering me about going out during the weekends and there is not a single friday night or saturday night where they don't make me feel bad for not going to night clubs and bars. As it was the highlight of their youth, they cannot conceive me disliking these activities. I decided to go to college without any pressure from my parents but they would never have accepted me becoming a NEET. Hell, there is no concept of privacy in my house, they always want to know what I am doing and if by any chance my father catches me in an escapist activity, he goes into long rants about how I need to play the game of life and fuck some girls.

>>12687
I hope this question is not out of place but which disease do you have?

>>12689
Crohn's disease, with a full colostomy and an IPAA (the initial diagnosis was UC, which is what the colostomy was for).

>>12688
>As it was the highlight of their youth, they cannot conceive me disliking these activities

It's like this with my father too


They tried hard enough to make me socialize more, since I was a kid. It didn't worked, and they accepted it, mostly.

As for my neetdom, I went to a college by my own will, they didn't pressure me(thought I felt pressured to do it by a lot of other things). When I dropped out, I think they understood my situation.

I don't know how long this will last but at least for now they are allowing me to be neet without any major pressures.
The problem is that they have too much hope for me. Things would be far easier if they just accepted that their elder son is a failure at life.

>>12692
That's much different than my life where I was and am encouraged not to do anything outside of the house or in my own personal UNLESS my parents approve. When I was much younger I was afraid to even attempt to make friends with people because I knew my parents would just break our friendship because they don't like them or we would somehow have to be friends in secret. As a result I had none and spent so most of my first 15 years of life in a basement or in the living room playing games. I would have ended up where I was right now either way but I could have at least had a more fulfilling youth. Now they sit here and wonder why I'm so lonely and fucked up. Eaten alive by my own desires.

During my teenage years, my mom got upset with me for staying inside all the time. She always wondered why I never went out with friends or anything like that, and got mad at me for not having a job like she did when she was my age (I actually didn't mind working, but the job market went to hell right as I became old enough to work, and I had no car of my own).

It didn't help that she made me stay inside all the time when I was a child. Not once was I allowed to sleep over at a friend's house or play outside in the neighborhood. Hell, I couldn't even go online and talk to people there. I got used to being alone, and then come age 14 she wonders why I'm not a social butterfly.

Now she's either accepted my ways, or she's just found better luck trying to live through my sister, who has friends, enjoys sports, and was actually allowed to go out as a kid.

>>12695

I never understand why parents keep their kids inside all the time and then wonder why they have no friends or social skills come teenage years.

>>12696
Fear mongering media has made parents paranoid and overly protective, and robbed people of common sense along with the ability to think for themselves.

there has to be some people on here that believe they lead the ronery lifestyle solely because of complicit parents. A selfmade ronery has the financial means to be social/get over his social anxiety through psychosomatic therapy,medication, and behavioral counseling.

my parents could have pushed me a little harder but on the other hand I could have been less of a piece of shit

My mother micromanaged my life for a long time and kept telling herself that I was one of the smartest children she'd ever seen, that I'd become a well known engineer or scientist by age 22 and amaze the world with my discoveries. I think the last time I had a proper summer vacation was when I was 12 years old, because afterwards I'd have to visit private tutors 3 or 4 times a week. When my grades started going down in HS she tried to fight it for a little while before accepting that I'm a failure and giving up. These days she doesn't bother me much

>>12701
Yes you're right, in the end we're all responsible for our choices and blaming our parents is not going to solve anything.

One of the biggest signs of maturity is taking responsibility of your life.

>>12707
>liberal parenting

i can relate.

My mother kind of stopped...caring, around the time I was 15. I really wish she'd nag me more. I think she's a horrible parent/person and it disgusts me to know that I have her genetics in me.

She's so passive-aggressive. It irritates me, and I want to get out of this house, but I'm essentially trapped. Who would hire a drop-out NEET? You need money to progress in this world, ane I have none. Nor does my family (my mother is on unemployment, actually - how charming and non-trashy).

Fuck life, sometimes.

>>For those of you who have had parents that did not allow you to practice Neetdom/Hikidom in their home, do you wish they would have?

Yes

>>12711
that isn't 'liberal parenting'

>>12708
when you have responsiblity or control, sure take it. when you don't or have back baggage, LOL NO

>>12712
There's always SSRI, or whatever social service bucks your country might offer. Have you looked into those?

Some of us didn't graduate from high school, you know. And some of us were literally forced to go to school and got treated like fucking shit by normalcools.

My dad was also kind of an asshole and was the reason why I couldn't have friends over. He kind of regrets that now.

>>12716

go for a Good Enough Degree (GED). Most people I've known could've gotten one at 16, barely half way through the high school curriculum. As long as you aren't a dumb nigger with an IQ less than 80, it shouldn't be hard. Especially now, with all the "no child left behind" including dumb niggers and spics who can't even speak the language who really lower the mental requirements to getting one.

it's enough for most union labor apprenticeships (electrician, welder, etc.) and IT entry level positions.
Really, though, as long as you don't look/smell/act like a convict, druggie, or mentally handicapped person, there shouldn't be too much issue getting into one of those positions, at least once you find a place with the spot open and can talk to somebody in person about it.

>>12716
I just barely graduated from, failed so many classes. My grades were up and down for all years besides my final year because it was easy as fuck since most of the time all I had to do really do is sit around most of the day and go get people or organize stuff, take some easy graphic design class that consisted of doing highly detailed step by step projects in photoshop and flash, and the only other thing I had to do was attempt to not fail some freshman math class that I still failed but teacher just gave me a D after a while to get me out.

Also I have one very distant friend, who I hung out with one day. Later she decided she wanted to stay over my place that night since she wasn't doing anything. Fine with me, gave me someone to talk to. But my father is such a asshole, he likes to project himself on to everyone around him that is a male. Said some of the most embarrassing things ever because he likes to pretend that just because I have a friend that's a girl she is my 3DPD which leads to some horribly awkward conversations where I try to avoid every projection of himself he throws at me like a verbal bullet hell game. She knows what I really am also so at least that makes it a little better. Then forever afterwards all he does is think the same shit over it. I don't ever expect to have anymore friends or someone who is more than just a friend unless some miracle happens but I can only imagine how much worse he would be since some things he'd rather not confront about me would be unavoidable at that point. Never again, I have to hide my friends from my parents.

IMO you can't blame your parents or anyone else if your life falls into a rut - only yourself. They may be willing to keep a roof over your head, perpetuating your NEET life, but it's not really up to them to usher you out into the dreadful thing we call the real world.

Drop out, take it easy for a while (relax, study, learn about yourself/your interests) then go write the GED test. There is seriously no need to attend high school for an entire 4 years when everything you learn is so terribly elementary. After that, find a job or trade of some sort that can support a modest life. Yes it's going to be repetitious and mundane, but if you truly had any desire for a more adventurous, rewarding lifestyle filled with luxuries you'd have put effort into achieving that. You don't even need "higher education" anymore when in most cases, you'll earn more and have more stability working a trade (as >>12717 illustrates) than you would if you wasted 4 years in college.

Autism bux/SSI and all that is not a good idea. While one can easily get on it and live off it, it's not a guaranteed way to live. What happens when you're, say 32, and your psychiatrist decides you don't need them - and you've spent 10+ years in solitude, with complete atrophy of your social development? Or what if political or economic changes impact it (how much you receive, whether you'll continue to be eligible)? You'd be out on your own without anything.

Perhaps that all sounds a bit condescending or easy (it's certainly no simple task), but believe me when I say life will be a lot harder if you don't act while you can.

>>12719
uhh, yeah, it is.
It's common sense that parents are responsible for how their kids grow up.
you'd be a completely different person if you were raised by different people.

>>12719
The supposed insecurity of relying on free money also goes for working a trade - you can get laid off, fired, have your field become obsolete, get injured, or hit any number of other hazards outside your influence.

If circumstances become dire enough that autismbux doesn't bring food to the table, people without jobs won't be safe either - if the economy is bad enough to warrant making poor people starve (a really fucking bad idea, since you do NOT want hungry people rioting on the streets), people will be laid off in droves and even a job won't save you from the meat grinder.

>>12720
If you are capable of recognizing that there is a problem then it is your own fault, not your parents or anyone else's. Once you understand that something is wrong it is up to YOU to act and start moving things in a good direction. It is NO ONE's responsibility to do it for you.

>>12722
Humans aren't self-sufficient perfect creatures that operate independently. People have a massive influence on each other, and the people who raise a child (usually their parents) are probably the largest influence on the child by far, just by the sheer amount of time spent around them. I'm not saying that there is no meaning whatsoever in personal responsibility, but condemning a beast and only the beast for being born of and raised by beasts isn't exactly sensible.

>>12723
I did note the condition of "if you are capable of recognizing that there is a problem..."

>>12717
I guess fucking retarded honkeys aren't on your list.

>>12733

can you do basic retard-level algebra?
If not, can you comprehend both what is written and what the writing illustrates from the wikipedia article on it?
Telling yourself "YOU ARE STUPID" is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

also
>honkeys
honk honk motherfucker. Unless you have Aspergers, Autism, AND Downs, you are still smarter than the black man from your biological white heritage, of which got his GED at 25 when he got out of prison.

>>12741
I -am- black.

Also, aspergers and autism is not something which degenerated or prevents intelligence. And yes, I am autistic as well.

honkey = us based slur for a european person.

>>12745
>I -am- black.

You don't say!

>>12745
>I -am- black.

Even so, your proper grammar is evidence enough that you easily have the mental capacity to fully complete the GED.

and with your minority status, you should be able to get into one or more of the GED training seminars from the local community college that has the GED testing with either no cost or a heavily reduced cost. As that should be the case, I strongly recommend taking a few of the seminars (there should be one for each section of the GED, ie. math, english, etc.)

You may not believe me now, but once the proctor starts going over the basics of what will be covered on the GED, you'll see that it really isn't as difficult as you are imagining it to be. Or at worst, you should be able to learn quickly the material and then have little trouble with the actual test.

The GED is literally a 9th grade test. If you passed 10th grade Math, English, etc., you should be fine.

>>12752
I failed everything in middle school and high school.

>>12748
Indubitably

>>12749
1. Please don't use the term 'proper grammar' and equating speaking in White American English to mean "intelligence".
2. I have a Haruhidamned college degree. An Associates, as a matter of fact in History.
3. I only entered this debate because of insulting terms used.
4. Speaking of tests, I literally re-took my ACT because this admissions officer said the scores rise naturally and that would be beneficial to transferring to a 4 year institution, many of which she gave me information about.

>>12754
>1. Please don't use the term 'proper grammar' and equating speaking in White American English to mean "intelligence".

Sorry but people who speak like gibbering apes with peanut butter in their mouths are generally not very intelligent

>>12756
really? A foreigner making statements of the intelligence of nations & ethnic groups out of their sense of superiority. Why I'd never?

>>12758
You, getting involved in stupid arguments and talking about yourself? I am very shocked!

>>12759
I didn't know the cultural autonomy and physical existence of a nation of 40 million people was a case of "stupid arguments and talking about yourself". Please, tell me more!

>>12760
You can't stop talking about yourself (black, chicago, debate teams, cons, blah blah blah), you make long shitty pseudo-intellectual posts about things not a single person here gives a fuck about, and when you aren't typing in/defending exaggerated ebonics like some sort of internet minstrel show you're using retarded 4chan lingo. Plus, the other day, you actually mocked people here for being virgins like some sort of stupid high school kid. Why you've been tolerated here all this time (a very long time, another thing you never fail to mention) is a mystery to me.

>>12761
Who are those people you are talking about?

>>12762
I think they're both incoherent. How can you write pseudo-intellectual posts in Ebonics, anyway? If you're trying to appear as an intellectual, the last thing you'd want to do is write in a way most people think is retarded. It's like typing an essay about Hegel's Phenomenology of Spirit with Caps Lock turned on.

>>12763
>If you're trying to appear as an intellectual, the last thing you'd want to do is write in a way most people think is retarded.

That's what's so crazy about it

>>12763
>>12764
Nationalists do that to 'elevate the status' of their languages, writing national epics or translating things into 'non prestige' tongues. It happened with Finnish & Ukrainian, for example. Hell, in Ottoman era 'Turk' meant low-class & Ottoman Turkish had a shitload of Persian and Arab loanwords. The nationalist Turks under Kemal promoted vulgar (as in common) Turkish over Ottoman Turkish and reformed the language to be what the average Turk on the souk said.

Just because someone knows how others speak and knows their manner of communication does not have a lot of prestige does not mean they will stop speaking like that - Cockneys in London knew how the upper class spoke. Doesn't mean they spoke like that.

>>12765
Maybe it's just me, but I think there's a difference between writing a national epic in the colloquial and typing in a way that'll get you pegged as an idiot on an imageboard.

But disregarding that and more to the point, it doesn't change others' apprehension of the way you type as stupid right now, thus counterproductive if you want to appear as an intellectual. Thus, if you type in Ebonics, you're probably unconcerned with appearing as an intellectual. Well, that, or you don't understand how other people react to Ebonics.

I generally wouldn't recommend typing in a nonstandard way because it's about as much fun to read as SoMeTHinG LIke tHIS, AnD tHE NOVeltY wEaRS oFF JuSt aS QuIckLY.

>>12766
Well, -I- don't do that. But I can understand the POV of one who does. I'm not sure about the other guy either. Maybe he confused two or three different people who type the same of similar, or two people arguing as one.

I have noticed you can detect individual people based of how they type on really small anonymous sites over a period of months/years

I would have probably been normal if it were not for my parents. My mom was scared of me socializing with other kids since we lived in a bad neighborhood, so when she dropped me off in school she made me stand next to her while everyone played before class started. She did this until I was in 7th grade.
I didn't mind it since long before then I kind of figured she was the only person in my family that cared for me. My grandma left me in school for hours without picking me up because it was raining or she had a headache, and I needed to see if a teacher felt sorry enough for me to drive me home at 5pm.

when I started middle school and high school I could have had a 3DPD, but my mom kept telling me I wasn't allowed to have a 3DPD, I mean what the fuck? I was asked out plenty of times by girls, but every time it just kept ringing in the back of my head, that I had no car, no way to take her on dates, my mom didn't let me get a job or a 3DPD anyways so she wouldn't help me at all.
Maybe she was scared I'd get a girl pregnant by assuming I'd be a giant piece of shit like her, a stupid girl that whored herself around to get pregnant at 15.
I always took it though. I didn't want to be disrespectful. When she went out to party and didn't come back until noon next day while I was home alone in elementary school, how I was never allowed to have friends over or visit friends, I wasn't allowed to be in school clubs or do any sports.
I was practically raised by videogames that my dad bought me whenever he visited once every month and a half.

Ever since I turned 18 a few years ago, she somehow expected me to magically fit into the world and find a 3DPD and know how to socialize and hold a job. Now I'm soon turning 21 and haven't done anything with my life other than sleeping in all day until she gets home to pour cold water on me and tell me to get the fuck out of bed.
I don't even know if one of these days I'll just strangle her to get rid of her disgusting voice, I don't want to hear it I don't want to hear it holy fuck.

>>12768
I definitely know that feel, my mother was a little less restrictive on me but still very restrictive and abusive. The only friends I was aloud to have were people she already knew and set me up for. We had some fun but they weren't really my friends and took advantage of my kindness to much. I was also never aloud to go anywhere, I would have sneak out as far as the end of middle school just to go for a walk on my own. Since I was so sheltered when I was younger at school I was the definition autistic retard who knew of nothing but games. Almost every memory I have of middle school and down makes me cringe. Even my voice was the most laughably disturbing thing anyone had the displeasure of listening to which is at least better now for the most part. I couldn't even speak to anyone properly. All I did was play games and fap to my fantasies of fetishes with people I will never feel which stuck with me up to this point and will forever mind you since I didn't develop much at all and by the time I got to high school I was already frustrated with my life, I couldn't relate to anyone anymore and went down a path of total self destruction and here I am now at 20 still the same generally but even worse in many ways. During highschool after I was at least able to use my brain a little since I was like a fucking new born at the ripe age of 15, me and my mother got into a lot of fights and began to hate each other. Now I am stuck with her till one of us dies and we don't really fight anymore but she is still very repulsive to me and I have to do everything with her. I sometimes go with her when she goes shopping just to go somewhere. I don't even buy anything I just wander off on my own into some store pretending to look for something and occasionally buy snacks or Amazon cards. I'm eternally a child trapped in a growing body. But at least I stayed a smaller than most others and don't look all that "manly" which would makes things really fucked up and awkward for me. You should see most people my age compared to me, even the girls are sometimes taller than me. I'm not going anywhere, no one wants me anyways.

Op here.

Would anyone here be capable of answering the questions I posed?

Its a simple task Im sure someone here could muster up the motivation to follow through with it, Haruhi knows yall dont follow through with much anything else.

>>12773
maybe everyone's parents here let they be neets?

>>12773

I answered your questions by farting really loud at my computer screen but I guess that didn't translate well, sorry

>>12773
I did at
>>12713

>>12776
haha

Well, my mother put in as much effort as she dared. When I was young (9-12) I always kept to myself, but I did have a small number of friends. When I was a teenager though I was usually pretty awful to my mother as far as telling her to leave me alone. She was very kind and tried to help in any way she could, but I was being a roadblock. I saw many therapists, but was unlucky with some of them and started shutting down when I went to sessions.
Around 17 she at least stopped asking the whole 'when are you getting a 3DPD' line of questions. I had a handful of friends that I sometimes would have visit, so I'm sure she wasn't too worried.
Around when I turned 18 though, I became sick (not mentally!) and had to finish schooling from home. I straightened out my attitude because it was obvious she had been suffering for my sake.
I can stay as a NEET because I'm still sick, with no sign of it going away. I get disability checks and whenever she needs money I gladly give it to her.
I have a young brother that has his own emotional problems thanks to his father, my sister was born premature and has mental handicaps, and my stepfather is generally just being a horrible person by being moody, drinking, arguing over nothing, losing his job every now and then...
My mother has so much to stress over, I don't blame her for my condition. I was sorta odd from the start, and circumstance made things difficult for her as it is.
I've caught her crying alone several times.. she's fought hard enough, and she's still fighting every day for my entire family.

My mom stopped caring about what I do long ago. My dad just ignores me for the most part. They realized that I'm never going to get a job or a family. I don't care. They let me keep to myself and do what I want. I just pay them a bit of the money I get from the government and they let me stay.

My family was really kind and I was allowed as much as any average person was. I was also never ever punished and really rarely forced into things.

Even so I came to be someone who simply prefers staying at home and dreads the thought of working. I'm incredibly dependent on support from my parents when it comes to managing my responsibilities. I never really learned to do it myself because the support was always there. Honestly, I can't do a thing alone. That's to be expected growing up like that but even so I wouldn't blame my parents.

I'm currently studying mostly to have a pretense of doing something because my parents don't want me to be a NEET. I've had a fairly good school life so I don't want to throw that away and go past some point of no return. That was a decision I made rationally but reality looks quite different... I can't even imagine working in the field that I study one day. University really feels more like an excuse not to have to work, so basically I'm still running away.

I guess I'm not whom this thread is targeted at, but I just want to say it makes me incredibly angry reading the stories ITT about stupid parents fucking up their children by behaving like retards. It really irritates me, it's like this injustice of pure chance "haha the people who gave birth to you are scum so enjoy your shitty childhood which will turn you into a shitty person". It makes me fucking angry because I'm so used to having a good life that I can't even imagine something like that happening to myself. I normally am not that empathic but this gets me.

>>13048
You and me are very alike. I went to colleg efor a year before dropping out, and I recently told them I wanted to get back into college or at least get some training for a skill. I really don't want to though and I know it's only so I don't have to work. My parents are too nice to me I think. They never get mad even when I absolutely want them too.

My mom said she was proud of me yesterday, just because I woke up and went to the general store right by my neighborhood to buy fabreeze and baking soda after my sister burned some noodles and it smelled like shit everywhere.
I don't see why doing that would have made her proud, so I guess that means she thinks I'm some shut in loser, even though I'm not. I go out all the time, I drive around town nearly every night, buy cans of coffee, and sometimes watch movies.

>>13051
My mom tells me she's proud of me for the most trivial things, too. It drives me crazy.

I also think it's because I'm a shut-in loser.

My mother thinks that I am retarded.

My mother compliments the most random things I do too, I can just be making my usual rice and terriyaki sauce on a Monday for dinner and she'll compliment it like I just made some five star meal and I can't tell if she's the stupid one or she's making fun of me or she thinks I'm actually retarded. Then she also implies so much about me when I'm out with her and she's actually being nice to me. A mix of truth and false implications. She likes to play head games with me. If there's things she wants to ask me, why doesn't she just ask me? Frustrates me so much. I mean I'll tell you anything you want to know about me, you don't need to dance around the dot with endless implications.

Post edited on 1st Feb 2013, 2:52pm

This is weird, my parents tell me they're proud of me too. I guess because where I live is a shitty area and one out of every three people has spent time in prison. "Not stealing a car/ not getting a 3DPD pregnant" is probably good enough for them.

>>13063
Same here, the comparison thing makes me look like a better person than I am.

My parents didn't put much of a fight. I would say that was neglectful on their part. However, I do feel some appreciation because they let me live as a Hiki since I was young, around 9.

I basically shut myself inside the house until 18, when they made me go to college. (I did not have grades 5 - 6 and high school education prior to this.) and I was all "lol ok" but I realize now that I might have made a terrible mistake since now I've been struggling with my social anxiety. I've been with the same section for 1 year and I'm still like a stranger to all of them.. It's quite lonely to see the same people leave you again and again and ignore you. It's as if I don't exist.. I just indulge myself in VNs and MMORPGs...

>>13063
heh. better than overachieving pushy asian parents (no I am not east asian THANK FUCK)