I try not to think to much about it.

Hopefully if I manage to get autisum moneys, I can help out a bit.

Post edited on 22nd Jun 2012, 2:28pm

I just think: "It's her fault for having me".

The only reason I exist is because of the stupidity that all woman seem to have and her inability to think about things instead of going on small, worthless feelings and desires.

I know that I seem to hate her (which I mildly do), I still try my best to help her out whenever I can. Despite the fact that she thinks of me as and treats me like a retard.

I really wish that I was never born.

I use to feel like a burden, but lately I feel like my parents would be lonely without me around

I try not to come out of my room when they are at home. If I have to, I make sure that I have my head down and avert any eye contact.

The people I live with (parents and sister) always make me feel terrible when I'm around them.
Outside (and in) my room I just want to be quiet but they have to make as much noise as possible and question me and try to talk to me. I just can't speak anymore to anyone it's too..not awkward but similar wording.

I wish I had the money to move out. Maybe we could all pool together and buy a /tc/ house for us all or something.

>>10688
I live with my dad and my younger sister and I know a bit of what that's like. They both try to emotionally manipulate me constantly and are constantly telling me what "I" want and what "I" need to be happy. "I'd be happiest if you could just leave me in my room with a computer and a bunch of books!" I tell them, but that only makes them angrier for some reason. Fucking Ford Drivers, forcing their narrow worldviews and ways of life on everyone else. Not everyone needs constant reaffirmation of their worth from everyone around them, not everyone cares about having kids.

I try not to be such a burden is all. Just give me food, a computer with a fast cpu and average gpu, a average stereo system I can connect to it, and some money to buy more food or drinks on my own with and I'm happy enough to not kill myself at least. I'm too stupid to live on my own never mind get a living wage if I ever get a job. I would go as far as saying I'm probably borderline retarded. I hope when I'm forced out of the house that I can live off of government payments somehow because that's the only way it's going to happen but I fear I'm too stupid to even know how to go about doing that. I'm so fucked up I can't go anywhere else with my life. I hate how my parents still treat me like a normal human being because it's pretty clear I'm the equivalent of a failed science experiment in a human body.

My mother and eldest sister are convinced that I am autistic (aspergers). They more or less gave up on me. The rest of my family doesn't give a fuck one way or another.

I work part time and only pay for food. Still feels somewhat bad as I just want to live on my own.

I live with my mum. I eat very little and never ask for any money in an attempt to leech as little as possible. I get a bit depressed when she waves goodbye for work. Maybe every two weeks, she asks if I'm going to apply for a job or college, or even just go out. That's been going on since the new year, although I've been hiki since November after failing to stay in college for more than a few months.

She's much too nice and I'm much too lazy. She still thinks I will have a normal life at some stage, but the reality is that I've had no idea what to do since leaving high school.

Post edited on 7th Jun 2012, 2:09am

I'm a burden to the state, not my family, and if the state don't like it, well then I guess they can suck my fat, hairy balls. That's what they get for putting flouride in the water. All the money that is spent on continuing my existence is welfare money, ergo, my money, and my mother damn well knows it.

All I do is occupy one single room in the house, a room for which my parent readily admits she has no other use for. Apart from that I will occasionally venture down to have a shit or dip my hand in the fridge. I never go in the living room because television is fucking garbage, so apart from the odd mug or plate there's practically no proof of my living there. The only tangible effects my life has on hers is that she must go out out once a week to buy food for me - which she must also do for herself anyway - and that she cooks dinner for me. And by "she cooks dinner for me" I mean the oven cooks dinner for me. She just spends approximately 20 seconds putting it in then putting it on a plate. I made it perfectly clear that I don't fall for any feminist, whining bullshit. Aww, is it difficult spending one hour a week cleaning the house? Oh well, just don't bother, I never leave my room anyway.

I can't believe the shit you people take from your family. I put mine in their place the second they started up with any crap. What, she seriously thinks I'm going to bust my ass spending hundreds of pounds a month on something I already have (a place to live)?! Uh, fucking why? Why don't I just buy a knife with no blade and a bike with no wheels while I'm at it? Luckily my mother isn't a stupid cunt like some of yours seem to be and is actually able to see sense. HA HA HA HA!

>>10736
Tell me where you live punk. Nobody insults my mother.

>>10737

That's probably why she shits on you. Slap her sensibilities and spit on her preconceived notions. Shove her into the reality of the situation - that you don't owe her nor any other fucker on this planet a damn thing, and if she doesn't like it, then advice her to deal with it with alcohol or anti-depressants, because it ain't your problem.

>>10738
Other than the fact she pisses me off a lot of the time I'm glad she lets me live free in the house. I get no shit for not doing anything with my life and I'm grateful.

Sucks to be you.

>>10736
Someone that actually said how they feel, I think a lot of us feel this way but we don't even admit it here. You don't actually care about anything you just want a roof over your head and infinite youth and pleasure. We all use people we say we love for something because after all if there was nothing to get from them would we apply any worth to them at all. Everything you want in life can be boiled down to selfishness, such is human nature. I don't try to hide it either. See how instantly here you got a an angry post thrown at you? We who express how we really feel have no place anywhere, we just hang out all over the internet because we find something entertaining in it or something we can relate to, we don't really belong loyally to any communities. We are the real outsiders. We are hated by everyone for being ourselves. If you really want to make friends with anyone or be accepted anywhere you better have many personal masks that reveal only what you want people to know about you to hide your ugly, truthful face. Life is a strategic game of hiding.

>>10739

I don't take shit, which was the entire point of everything I said, and if you don't either, then really why the fuck are you replying? Whatever nigger I really don't give a shit. I don't give a shit, I don't take shit, it's like I'm a... a... what's the opposite of a sewer? Ah fuck it.

>>10740

That's right, we are just slivers of the universe that became self-aware. That's it. No need to pile any fake, constructed notions on top of that fact. No responsibilities, no obligation, no morality, no guilt. The greatest evil is "thou shalt". Fuck everything.

>>10740
I spend my time doing things I don't enjoy doing, things I hate with every ounce of my body but still feel obligations towards doing. I've self-harmed in the past, physically and emotionally. I love someone who treats me like crap and I bear with it even though it makes me feel worse than I'd feel if I shut myself in, away from everyone. If we humans are really only hedonists, if we only live in the pursuit of immediate pleasure, how can you explain those kinds of actions or mindsets? That is, not all of our impulses or obligations bring us pleasure; why is that so?

>>10741
> we are just slivers of the universe that became self-aware
I agree with you, and I think that's the closest we can be to having free will, being self-aware.

>>10742

Look up a guy called Mooji on YouTube.

>>10744
One thing always bothers me with these teachings of release. In order to be truly free, would I have to let go of my waifu as well since I am holding onto my love for her, holding onto her?

>>10736
If you are really so happy, why are you so hostile?

>>10747

Take whatever message you want from him. Maybe he's right about some things and wrong about others. I agree with his sentiments on nothingness and the importance of relaxation and freedom from mental garbage. He says not to reject love, joy, peace and other such good things. Keep looking, you'll find answers.

Here's something to mull over. What if you were able to just suddenly stop thinking about everything that is;

- Fictional
- Impossible
- Improbable
- Unknowable
- Not fully understood / not proven as a fact
- Trivial
- Or otherwise does not directly represent known reality at the present moment?

What thoughts would you be left with really? How much of these thoughts are really YOU? See how cluttered the mind is with such utterly useless rubbish? Your mind is not your friend. How can it be when it leads you to things you do not want? Mooji suggests that in fact the mind is not even you at all, only a construct around the real you. I'm not sure of how literally one is meant to take this idea, but I'm not inclined to reject it straight away. My mind is a piece of shit asshole that has only brought misery. I don't trust it.

>>10751

Your entire lifestyle and beliefs are being attacked by ignorance, disrespect and with a false sense of superiority from people who are supposed to love you. Defend yourself.

Sit your parents down and straight up tell them how it is. Tell them about how the global economic system is based on infinite growth while inhabiting a finite planet, then point out how utterly foolish the idea of 'contributing' to such a system really is. Tell them that if success is measured in wealth then since they do not live in a mansion nor do they own a private jet, a yacht and six sports cars then really they are little better than you. Just tell what you know to be true.

If they reject it then they are lost and their opinions aren't worth shit, because only fools deny reality. Then you can safely ignore any criticisms they have, comfortable in the knowledge that they can't help it, they're just stupid. If they come to understand and accept your position then congratulations, they'll get off your back. Either way you make life easier on yourself.

>>10753
I have done this. They don't care (my mom and her boyfriend). It's hard to reprogram people after 40 years of blind allegiance, even if you present logical points. What makes it even more difficult is that they weren't raised on logical points to begin with. See state of entire planet for reference.

Anyway, my point is that I might get kicked out because I'm not helping them pay rent. It doesn't matter to them that my entire belief system is built on how corrupt the system is and that I would much rather die than work.

I guess I would have this threat if it was just my mom. Step-parents are such a burden...

>>10754

Ugh, the inane demand for rent, the idea that you must pay for the right to exist on this planet. Just call their bluff. http://www.rentlaw.com/eviction.htm

They in all likelihood have no legal grounds to evict you, and since they are not the landlords, they can't demand rent from you either. Nip this bullshit in the bud.

>>10759

Actually, most places have a law that, after 16 or 18 years of age, you cease to be considered a dependent and your parents can legally kick you out.

You can only be "evicted" when you've signed a legal contract/lease, but that doesn't mean your parents can't boot you out past a certain point.

>>10760

Parents can certainly attempt to kick out their adult offspring, but you're implying that they have carte blanche legal powers. You have the right to legally defend yourself too. You can remain as a dependant past age 18 if you have a mental illness, and you can make other defences as well if they have no reasonable grounds (you're not doing anything illegal or disruptive) for the eviction other than "we're sick of looking at him". See how well that holds up in court.

>>10759
Yes, it's an unbelievably twisted world. However, I don't live in the United States, so I don't have that method at my disposal.

>>10760
Unfortunately this is true. Yes, you can't be evicted because you are not a tenant, but the fact that you are not a tenant is the worst thing you have going for you. Whomever has their name on the lease or the deed can kick you out at any time. Only the lease/deed holder actually has any claim to live on any property.

Is it really that hard to get a job? You make your own money and eventually you may be able to move into your own place with your own things and habits where you can do what you want. Besides, free time without work is meaningless. After working for ten hours, five hours of free time is more valuable to me than fifteen hours of free time in a day. Consider that.

>>10766
>you can do what you want

After 8 hours of soul crushing, mind numbing shit shovelling? No thanks.

>free time without work is meaningless

Opinion.

>>10766
>After working for ten hours, five hours of free time is more valuable to me than fifteen hours of free time in a day

If you have a rewarding job I can see this being true, but when you work long, gruelling, worthless hours in retail it's the exact opposite.

>>10766
>Besides, free time without work is meaningless
I had 14 years of going to school all day to teach me to value my time, I don't need to do some mundane task for 8+ hours a day to remind me to value it. You don't have to go through shit to find a positive somewhere, you can simply enjoy your own time as it is. It's like saying don't eat for a couple of days so you stop taking food for granted or slam your head against the wall so you feel relieved in a few days time when it stops hurting.

>>10736
Look at me guys! I'm such a badass, ranting against my mother when she puts a roof over my head.

No wonder she's complaining so much. She has a son who's stuck in the edgy teenager phase. Take her place for a week; I guarantee you'll be exhausted too.

>>10772
I agree with you. Retail is a bitch.

>For those of you who can't earn a living wage and are forced to take advantage of someone's hospitality

Why are you guys talking about work?
I assumed this thread to be exclusively for those unable to hold down a job due to disability, not something like "I don't feel like it".

I want to know how the terribly rude sir in this thread is receiving welfare payments though.

>>10885
>ranting against my mother

I have a very good relationship with my mother precisely because I criticised her erroneous opinions, an event which need take place only once, thus freeing her of any silly notions that somehow she is a victim. No, any stress in your life is not my fault, it's your fault, because I am a miniscule factor in your life. No, I am not a burden because I cost you nothing. No, all of your problems are caused by society and your reaction to it, not me. People are desperate for a scapegoat to dump all their shit on. Well, I ain't a fucking goat.

And no, I doubt I would be exhausted after a week of television watching and internet browsing. Learn some reading comprehension you tool.

Post edited on 24th Jun 2012, 10:01pm