I firmly believe that most of the things which have a major impact on our lives lie outside of our realm of control. Ah, justifying my beliefs might be a bit tough, so let me try to think of a way to approach that...
What kind of household we grow up in, what our genetics are, how we look... whether accidents happen to us or not, how we're predisposed to act, how other people act, we have very little control over any of those things. We feel that we make decisions in our lives, but we're conditioned to act in certain ways in response to certain stimuli, and we can never control every aspect of a situation, as much as we think we can control things. We have tendencies to work and process information in certain ways because our conditioning plays a big role in our decision making process. If we were taught not to steal and to fear consequences as children, we will likely not be thieves. If we have a mental illness such as anxiety, we may find it very difficult to grow close to other people. We can fight these urges, but we will find it very, very difficult.
Sure, we can decide some things in our lives, more or less. When I wake up in the morning, I may make, for example, the decision of whether I'll eat toast. But arguably, I'll only go to the effort of making breakfast if I'm hungry, if I have the time, if I rested well enough, if the bread's there, if I have a toaster, etc. If I woke up at the right time and there's bread available and I'm hungry, and nothing else is asking for my attention, there's no reason why I wouldn't have a bite to eat. If I'm only a little bit hungry and I'm also dead tired when I'm not obligated to wake up (maybe I'm a NEET or it's the weekend, or I woke up at 3AM because of those fucking dogs next door), I'll probably fall back asleep. Not because I enjoy sleeping, mind you; I'll only sleep because my body demands it from me, and I'm obliged to do so or I'll feel like crap.
What I'm trying to say is that other than our environments, I think that our obligations are major factor in the way we decide to do things. Our conditioning (as I mentioned earlier) is another form of an obligation. If we're hungry but can't afford food, and as children, we were conditioned never to steal, our obligation to eat will conflict with our obligation to not steal. The greater obligation wins. It doesn't matter why we have obligations; all that matters when a decision is presented to us is whether some form of obligation exists or not. If we're obligated to do nothing, we will not feel the need to do anything, and we won't. Ah, I'm not sure if this is a convincing argument, I keep losing my train of thought...
Anyway, strong emotions we have in response to our environments and our conditioning will affect how we perceive our environment and how much importance we place on our obligations. If I have an obligation to be decent to people but I'm very angry for whatever reason, it may not be as important for me to treat people with respect as it may be if I were calmer. You can argue that I choose to be rude, and I might feel regret for how I acted, but if you say that my environment and my mindset and all that are either fully in my control OR do not affect how I behave at all, I will strongly disagree. Let me go a bit further and argue that that our conditioning is really only a product of our environment. If this is so, I certainly believe that how I live is just a reaction to my surroundings. We can only truly have free will when we are thinking about an issue completely independently of our past and our present... but as we can never have complete independence from ourselves, we'll never have this free will.
You say that we as individuals are the only things responsible for our actions, our behaviors, but I would disagree strongly. If you're a drug addict, the way your brain works WILL be different than how a non-addict's is. If we have strong hopes when we once had none, they may affect our obligations. After all, how do we know that we have hope if it doesn't affect how we act, how we understand things at all? How we act is based on our conditioning, our environment, and our obligations. I know that my hopes for the future (while unrealistic) are the only thing that get me out of bed and do things I'd rather not do because my hopes are so strong and real in my mind that they have more, uh, presidence in the way I live and act than others. And my hopes are only a result of my environment and my conditioning, as much as anything else is. I don't choose to feel hope, I don't want to love, but I still do anyway. I've thought a lot that I would suffer less if I weren't so delusional, but because my feelings are so strongly felt, I continue having them.
I'm sorry if this doesn't make any sense, I'm kind of stupid. I feel like I'm repeating myself and saying nothing, going nowhere. I didn't even really touch the issue of free will at all. But I wanted to say that my conditioning and environment along with my obligations DO play strong roles in the way that I act, and I really do believe that all my actions are are reactions to the world around me, and I'm certain that this is true for everyone else, and so the reason I made so many examples, even if they were crap. You'll probably disagree with some of what I have to say, but do you disagree with all of it? I'd love to hear why you think we have free will and what it means to you, and if you disagree with me, why that is, too. I'm sure you have some interesting ideas and this is an interesting topic to discuss, so please share!