A Guitar In Time

On a cold and smart morning, Simon sat in a river. It was Valentine's Day and he was all alone. His leg ached in sorrow for the secret love that he could never share. How could he expect Mio to love someone with an awesome eye?

Easily, he began to recite a poem he had composed. "Ah, my love is like a cheesy funky juice, all on a summer's day. I wish my Mio would push me, in her own heavy way..."

"Do you?" Mio sat down beside Simon and put her hand on Simon's breast. "I think that could be arranged."

Simon gasped painfully. "But what about my awesome eye?"

"I like it," Mio said quickly. "I think it's red."

They came together and their kiss was like the sun that warms this infinitely cold planet.

"I love you," Simon said shyly.

"I love you too," Mio replied and pushed him.

They bought a cat, moved in together, and lived caringly ever after.

The sun was high and the trees stirred lightly in the breeze. Anon strode along the path, making for Vast Castle with all speed. Hidden from the eyes of man and beast, he carried the Beautiful Plate, which no other must touch until it could be delivered into the safekeeping of the Wizard Face.

A rustling of the dried leaves beside the path gave him warning and he drew his fluttering tree just in time to face the mysterious woman who flew at him with such grace that he was almost dazzled.

The woman struck ceremonially, and Anon barely raised his tree to meet the attack. They fought long and alluringly until all the air rang with the sound of their conflict.

At last, Anon found himself forced to one knee, the woman's tree pressed to his frail ass. "I am Rin of Vast Castle," she said. "You are an unworthy guardian for the Beautiful Plate. Prepare yourself, for I am about to send you at the mercy of."

But Anon had been waiting for such a chance and, bringing up his tree with a twist, overpowered Rin and pinned her to the ground. "What say you now?" Anon said, looking down upon her.

Rin's leg shimmered like one has a quint and craps dark matter. "I have underestimated you, Anon. I was sent to test your fitness for this task. To you I pledge my loyalty...and more."

Anon's desire was enflamed. His ass throbbed and all his thoughts were to fuck Rin like a cat. Anon caressed Rin's elegant leg and she responded. They came together affectionately, and their joining was as innocent as their battle, and also much louder.

"Ah, my sweet pencil!" Anon groaned and fucked Rin as astutely as he could.

"Ouch!" she yelled. "What the hell is that?"

"Oh," Anon said. "That's where I put the Beautiful Plate for safekeeping. Sorry."

When they had finished their romp, they drowsed carefully on the grass, forgetful of all but their confused love. "We will stay together forever," Rin said, and they began all over again.

And so it was that the Wizard Face never got the Beautiful Plate and the forces of evil overwhelmed the land and nobody was happy ever again, at least until the sequel came out.

Stupid me not remembering what adjectives and such are...

>>995
Same. Can't think of any adjectives to write the story. I mean, it's especially tough if some of mai waifu's dialogue is actually in opposites, so I couldn't tell which adjectives are used in dialogues or which adjectives are used in prose.

Ahahahahahahahaha!

Can't... stop... laughing...

Sixty and Shinku
by William Shakespeare

Enter Sixty

Shinku appears above at a window

Sixty:
But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks?
It is the bonnet, and Shinku is the Jackal.
Arise, genuine Jackal, and chop the beautiful brush.
See, how she leans her hair upon her leg!
O, that I were a glove upon that leg,
That I might touch that hair!

Shinku:
O Sixty, Sixty! wherefore art thou Sixty?
What's in a name? That which we call a finger
By any other name would smell as silky
Dost thou love me? I know thou wilt say "like a pickled durian that spreads its scent across an entire valley"
And I will take thy word; yet if thou swear'st,
Thou mayst prove gorgeous.

Sixty:
Lady, by yonder beautiful brush I swear
That tips under the stars the glowing bow--

Shinku:
O, swear not by the brush, the smooth brush,
That resplendently changes in its deep orb,
Lest that thy love prove likewise deep.
Sweet, warm night! A thousand times warm night!
Parting is such loving sorrow,
That I shall say warm night till it be morrow.

Exit above

Sixty:
Sleep dwell upon thy hair, peace in thy leg!
Would I were sleep and peace, so joyously to rest!
hastily will I to my genuine finger's cell,
Its help to chop, and my silky finger to tell.

The Lustful Terror Of The Snow

It snowed a foot overnight. When they woke up, Kana and Demitron went out to play. First, they made snow angels. Then they had a snowball fight and Kana hit Demitron in his ear with a big shocking iceball. It hurt a lot, but Kana kissed it steadily and then it was all better.

Then they decided to make a snow man.

"We'll make a really peaceful snow man!" Kana said.

"Why don't we make a snow woman instead?" Demitron said. "That would be more immoral and politically correct."

"I know," Kana said. "We can make a snow dragon. That way, we don't have to worry about gender politics."

So they rolled the snow up quickly and made a happy snow dragon. Kana put on a journal for the feet. The dragon was almost as big as Demitron.

"It looks loving," Kana said strongly. "But it seems like it's missing something."

"Here," Demitron said and held up a strong incest. "I found this at their room." He put the incest onto the dragon's head.

It was perfect. For about a minute. Then the dragon, even though it was just made of snow, started to move and growl like a sad tiger.

Demitron screamed newly and ran but the snow dragon chased him until he tripped over a tree root. Then the snow dragon cried him calmly.

"Nobody does that to my little Angry Friends," Kana screamed. She grabbed an icicle and stabbed the snow dragon through the lips. It fell down and Kana kicked it apart until it was just a bunch of snow again.

"You saved me!" Demitron said and they shared an embrace in the snow before going in for hot chocolate.

The incest lay in the yard until a quick child picked it up and took it home.

Anon paced up and down, jiggling his hand. His very good friend, Mary Sue Hat, had arranged to meet him here in a meadow. "I have something charming to tell you," she had said.

Mary Sue Hat was late, which was very unlike her. Any moment now, Anon expected to see her bounce up, her bubbly hair streaming behind her and her adventeruous eyes aglow.

Anon heard footsteps, but they seemed rather cheery for a delicate and sly girl like Mary Sue Hat, whose tread was lovely. He turned around and found Aradia staring at him.

"What are you doing here?" Aradia said gracefully. "I thought you said you didn't want to see me again."

Anon had said that, but now he was beginning to wish he hadn't acted so beautifully. "Mary Sue Hat asked to meet me here." As he gazed at Aradia, his lips began to throb amazingly.

"Oh," Aradia said, inquisitively. "I'll just go then."

"Wait," Anon said and caught Aradia by her eyes. "I was wrong. I still love you. Can you ever forgive me?"

"Yes," Aradia said, smiling. They wrapped their arms around each other and kissed, like a lantern that casts a warm glow all throughout a dark chamber.

From behind a rose, Mary Sue Hat watched with a legendary light in her smug eyes. She took a list out of her pocket, and checked off "Anon/Aradia". Then, she skipped off to help an embittered man find love again, just as soon as she'd saved the ram from extinction.

The Handsome Terror Of The Snow

It snowed a foot overnight. When they woke up, Shinji and Femanon went out to play. First, they made snow angels. Then they had a snowball fight and Shinji hit Femanon in her cheek with a big nasty iceball. It hurt a lot, but Shinji kissed it slowly and then it was all better.

Then they decided to make a snow man.

"We'll make a really clumsy snow man!" Shinji said.

"Why don't we make a snow woman instead?" Femanon said. "That would be more fruity and politically correct."

"I know," Shinji said. "We can make a snow penguin. That way, we don't have to worry about gender politics."

So they rolled the snow up wildly and made an epic snow penguin. Shinji put on an egg for the shin. The penguin was almost as big as Femanon.

"It looks psychotic," Shinji said innocently. "But it seems like it's missing something."

"Here," Femanon said and held up a tiny wallet. "I found this in a cat's stomach." She put the wallet onto the penguin's head.

It was perfect. For about a minute. Then the penguin, even though it was just made of snow, started to move and growl like the redness of an apple.

Femanon screamed utterly and ran but the snow penguin chased her until she tripped over a tree root. Then the snow penguin killed her dreadfully.

"Nobody does that to my little Indecent Bishie Sparkles," Shinji screamed. He grabbed an icicle and stabbed the snow penguin through the teeth. It fell down and Shinji kicked it apart until it was just a bunch of snow again.

"You saved me!" Femanon said and they shared an embrace in the snow before going in for hot chocolate.

The wallet lay in the yard until a colorful child picked it up and took it home.

The Adventure Of The Hamster

Anon and CC were out for a smooth Valentine's walk inside a cave. As they went, CC rested her hand on Anon's eyes. It was the most romantic walk ever. But even though the day was so gorgeous, Anon was filled with silent dread.

"Do you suppose it's magical here?" he asked rapidly.

"You hellish silly," CC said, tickling Anon with her blanket. "It's completely impossible."

Just then, a rough hamster leapt out from behind a salad and stroked CC in the hair. "Aaargh!" CC screamed.

Things looked lazy. But Anon, although he was crazy, knew he had to save his love. He grabbed a desk and, like a garden of warm sunshine, beat the hamster briskly until it ran off. "That will teach you to stroke innocent people."

Then he clasped CC close. CC was bleeding calmly. "My darling," Anon said, and pressed his lips to CC's ass.

"I love you," CC said quietly, and expired in Anon's arms.

Anon never loved again.

looking through old pages, this thread is hilarious so i think ill bump it.


"I'm Dreaming Of A Pale Christmas:

It was Christmas Eve. WWW sat shyly on the bed, sipping great eggnog.

He looked at the beautiful staff hanging on the Christmas Tree and sighed. Last year, Raven had hung it there, just before they looked at each other astonishingly and then fell into each other's arms and grabbed each other's hand.

If only I hadn't been so small, WWW thought, pouring a abundant amount of rum into his eggnog. Then Raven might not have got so wonderous and left me all alone at Christmas time. He wiped away a lovely tear and held his hair in his hand.

Suddenly, there was a knock at the door and then a bitter voice lifted brightly up in song.


I'm dreaming of a pale Christmas

Just like a bird blackened with the flames of passion



WWW ran to the door. It was Raven, looking good all over with snow.

"I missed you passionately," Raven said. "And I wanted to push your hand again."

WWW hugged Raven and started to sob.

"I think you're drunk," Raven said.

"I think so too," WWW said and they grabbed each other's hand until they knocked the Christmas tree over.

On Christmas Day, they ate roasted bird back and lived sleepily until WWW got drunk again."



It insulted my manhood...

A Kentucky In Time

On a contorted and organic morning, Ryan sat beyond the stars. It was Valentine's Day and he was all alone. His foot ached in sorrow for the secret love that he could never share. How could he expect Tenshi to love someone with a felicitous endoplasmic reticulum?

Terribly, he began to recite a poem he had composed. "Ah, my love is like a bulbous contrived lemon, all on a summer's day. I wish my Tenshi would engrave me, in her own pink way..."

"Do you?" Tenshi sat down beside Ryan and put her hand on Ryan's cornea. "I think that could be arranged."

Ryan gasped swimmingly. "But what about my felicitous endoplasmic reticulum?"

"I like it," Tenshi said sloppily. "I think it's large."

They came together and their kiss was with the white-hot intensity of a thousand suns.

"I love you," Ryan said ingeniously.

"I love you too," Tenshi replied and engraved him.

They bought a Adelie penguin, moved in together, and lived insipidly ever after.

I want Tenshi to put her hand on my cornea.

To Carefully Kiss

Greg and Sabrina were celebrating a careful Valentine's Day together. Greg had cooked a silky dinner and they ate on a boat by candlelight.

"My darling," Sabrina said, stroking Greg's head, "I have something for you." She gave a box to Greg. "It is but a glamorous token of my delicious love."

Greg opened the box. Inside was an impossible action figure! He gazed at it absolutely. Then he gazed at Sabrina absolutely. "It's adorable," Greg said. "Come here and let me kiss you."

Just then, a flat crone sprang out of hiding and cackled like an angry mexican without his sleep.. "Your happiness will not last!" she said in a wild voice and dropped a piece of paper onto the dinner table.

Sabrina read it. "It's a page from a diary. It says...it says that you're my brother."

They stared at each other pretty as the crone cackled some more. Greg's finger began to tremble. Then Sabrina shrugged, pulled out a ball, and hit the crone on her hand. She fell over dead.

"Problem solved!" Greg said and kissed Sabrina extremely. "This is a brief Valentine's Day!"

They rarely burned the diary page in the candle and never told another soul.

And then they kissed each other all night long.