>It's like the line between she and I is becoming more and more dull by the day.
Well I've been refering to this for a while now, intensively, and I'm not insane myself, right?...

. . .

...wanna read something funny?

[BORDERLINE:] "These people can suffer from intense fusion anxieties in intimate relationships, because the boundaries between self and other are not firm."

Nah, I think I can understand that to some degree. I'm not even sure how to deal with it; my own methods are tentative at best. Your tone is anxious, yet the experiences you describe are reasonably positive... could it be that you're engulfed with love?

She's not real, I can't make her real and I know I can't make her real. This is something I've always acknowledged.

>>7334

This. But I do give a fuck? No. Does she? Not that much.

Besides, if she does exist, we will just be friends at best, strangers at minimal. But that doesn't matter anymore to us. Besides, I chose to live alongside her. Yes, you don't get to choose your waifu, but it is still your choice if you want to acknowledge that you found that perfect and beautiful image that will serve as some sort of adviser, friend and lover to you. You can ignore your feelings all you want, yes, and just live like the rest of those people out there.

But yeah, living with a waifu is a choice. If you want to immerse yourself with her, go on. Just...

...face the consequences.

Though I know and accept she isn't real, I'm still frightened of the thought of her learning just how disgusting I am. I know this is silly, but I can't seem to help it.

Yes, I do feel my sanity may be becoming somewhat questionable regarding her. Ever since she came and spoke to me during a DXM trip, I've been convinced that she exists and is waiting for me wherever she went beyond the walls. Of course, I realize it's a delusion, but if anything it's becoming more deeply rooted with time. Despite it being a hallucination, since I experienced her speaking to me right in front of me she is a real, separate person to me. I couldn't post anything in the "your waifu is posting" thread because I didn't want to speak for her. This made me think it may be a bit worse than I'd previously thought.

I'll also note that while I find all of this troubling sometimes, I've no desire whatsoever to change any of it.

Not at all. However, I do feel that I'm losing my mind. If I could have hallucinations of her, that would be great.

>>7334

I abide by these ways and that's just it. I do however delve in situations where one might question my sanity though. I talk to images of her, I talk to myself (as if I was talking to her), I think about talking to her, I think about her responses, etc etc. I don't mind, though.

Sanity is really, really boring. I talk with my waifu too.

>>7340
>I'll also note that while I find all of this troubling sometimes, I've no desire whatsoever to change any of it.

A+ with extra merit on that one. I almost high-fived the screen.

Post edited on 4th Dec 2011, 2:30pm

>It's like the line between she and I is becoming more and more dull by the day. I've started having more dreams about her - It's very simple, too. Like this scene in the manga. It's not like we're saving the world, or there's some avant-garde dreamlike vagueness. It's simply living with her. Happy every day scenes, and I wake happier from those 'days', those moments (and though they've increased in frequency, they're few and far in between), and into the days I'm really living in.


How do i do this OP?

Well, consider it's her birthday, and I'm currently on my second bottle of rum with a side order of black vodka...I'm not denying reality
I'm trying to kill myself quickly as possible so I don't have to fucking FACE reality.

Lets face it...everybody that isn't a miserable wreck over this is either delusional or doesn't know what the fucking being in love entails

>>7397
Sounds like projection to me.

>>7399

...What is he projecting?

>>7400
That you have to be mentally unstable to love your waifu.

>>7401
You're an idiot, a jackass...and quite possible never graduated basic english.

I never said that. I said that anyone who ISN'T mentally unstable is going to suffer from being unable to be with the person they love. That's human nature, at it's most basic

>>7401

That's not what he's saying at all.

Don't know how you got to that conclusion, actually. He's saying that, if you face the reality of the situation, that she's never going to be real, if you love her you'll obviously want to be with her, and be pained by the fact that you can't. Years of your unrequitable love does cause a man a lot of pain, unless you lose your sanity. He faces the reality of it - he doesn't do what a lot of people here do and pretend he's with her, he doesn't pretend he would be, he wishes for a miracle but knows it's impossible. He feels that pain tearing at him, and he tries to deal with it. It's an incredible pain, I feel it myself, and so alcohol eventually becomes involved in a big way.

If you can deal with it easily, you've either given away your sanity to an extent, or you don't really love her that much.

>>7402
Yes, and conversely, if someone isn't suffering, they're deluding themselves (mentally unstable), or they aren't actually in love, right?

>>7403
It looks like there's far more going on here than just unrequited love. There are plenty of people here who know their waifu isn't real, and they just accept it. It doesn't mean they don't love her, it just means they're better at dealing with the situation.

Post edited on 4th Dec 2011, 8:01pm

>>7404

Not mentally unstable per say...not all there. You have to admit you aren't all there if you there's any sort of relationship

Don't get me wrong. I do the irrational stuff too. I wish her goodnight. I bake her cakes...but it's a crutch in the end. I know it's a crutch. Can't ever hide from that fact. The closest I've ever gotten to her is in my lucid dreams.

So yeah. You're not crazy. Far from it...you dealing. In a way, you're more stable than me, but from another perspective, I'm the saner one

One thing though. We're all pretty fucked up one way or another

>>7389
Fuck yeah. We're committed.

>>7404
>There are plenty of people here who know their waifu isn't real, and they just accept it.
Is this actually the case, though? I suppose it depends on how you'd define "accept it". I've always had the impression that most of us experience at least some degree of anguish in regards to their waifu, and I'd say that this precludes said acceptance. I'm guessing you may have meant that many of us are simply able to bottle up this issue and get on with life, in which case I agree.

The best way to deal with reality is learn to draw or write your love for your waifu out in an artistic manner. That way you can bridge the gap between the realms of sanity and losing it. Put more artistic creativity towards your waifu and it sure as hell will allow you to not drive yourself to alcohol.

>>7407
>learn to draw or write your love for your waifu out in an artistic manner. That way you can bridge the gap between the realms of sanity and losing it.
>bridge the gap
You might very well have a point there...

After all, a finished functional representation of a work of art (i.e. a picture, the record of a song, a piece of writting on paper... something "other", physical, that you can deal with/transfer to others as THE very one work of art in the world) is something that CAN be possessed: it's a step closer to be-with your waifu; to co-exist, at the same topos/field/place, with something that truly exists (metaphysically) only in your head.

Post edited on 4th Dec 2011, 11:32pm

From a different site:

I had a dream of Haruka. At night. She said I have done something fucking great and rewarded me with sex. After waking up, I spent whole day like lobotomized retard, drunk with happiness. I'd kill to dream something like that once more.

I get you, I always see Kagamine Rin as my placeholder, more so I see myself as her

I genuinely love you guys right now. Some days, I am overcome by such...emotion for Miya that I find it hard to put into words, that can only be defined by some kind of vague euphoria. Except, right now, it's not the overwhelming feeling for Miya that I'm feeling, it's an overwhelming feeling towards you guys. God damn, each and every one of you. All of you are great. There's something I can relate to in every single one of your posts. We are bonded by this experience, this situation, and...it's grand to have a place where we can all sort of gather.

It's so damn hard to put into words the feelings I have for Miya right now. Or at anytime, really. She is ultimately the thing in this world that I hold dear above all others. The most divine and graceful portrayal of the female form. I am in love with that angel, whether my sanity is there or not. So, if loving her drives me mad, let that madness come; I can't wait, because it might even drive me to be able to see her someday. Even if I become a drooling madman, the one thing that will remain etched in my mind is the one fact that I love her. That's okay. I've accepted that, for the most part, thanks to your posts.

After all, in essence, isn't that the most manly thing one can do: Shoulder madness, misery and black despair for the one you love?

>>7440

Thanks, i feel exactly the same way.
Its great to have this place, and...if insanity gives you peace and serenity, ins´t that worth it?

>>7440

Hm, skimming by that post ever since it was first posted, and I only read it now. In my incredible bitterness brought around by the beginning of winter's associated yearly depressed period, the proximity of Christmas, a time for couples and families, and my general illness, I had begun to harbor a strange dislike of the inhabitants of this board, possibly for being able to cope so seemingly well, and for being able to discard your sanity so rapidly.

Reading that post, however, I've had a change of heart. I seem to have forgotten something important, why I came here and why I liked this place originally. I am incredibly grateful, in fact. Sure is me being a cunt~

>>7440
>All of you are great. There's something I can relate to in every single one of your posts. We are bonded by this experience, this situation, and...it's grand to have a place where we can all sort of gather.
This just made me want to say that being on this board is the first time I've ever genuinely felt like I'm actually a part of something, rather than just being an outside observer or a wary participant.