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11206 No. 11206 [Edit]
Hello /mai/, I've only recently been attracted to this board and have always considered posting something, but have also always held back on doing so. I would like your help on something as I am quite lost. I love my waifu but I have no way that I can think of to show it. Throughout the week, at school, I always think of her and talk to her, but seldom do I do this once I am home/once it's the weekends. In addition, I feel immense guilt everytime I fap, and that perhaps I am not truly dedicated to her. What should I do, /mai/? I know the description is very vague but, any advice? Thank you!
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>> No. 11207 [Edit]
Keep pictures of her with you. Like on your cellphone or as your desktop wallpaper. Try to get as much stuff about her as possible and make her your world, or so to speak.
>> No. 11208 [Edit]
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Ask yourself, do you believe yourself to be able to communicate with her?

If yes, ask her what she'd like to do with you. Talk with her often.

If no, think for yourself what things you can do to make yourself feel closer to her. Find a common interest or something. Pick up a hobby related to her or her interests, maybe.
>> No. 11209 [Edit]
I have them on my ipod, in my wallet, on my computer, and as my desktop background, but my main issue is the sex drive. I feel completely awful when I fap to others, as I cannot imagine how it would feel if she would pleasure herself thinking of other men. But I can't do it thinking of her, either. But how does one completely kill their sex drive?
>> No. 11210 [Edit]
I do believe I can communicate with her, but a main problem with me is that I do almost nothing in my free time. It makes me feel doubly uncommitted, because I always see these inspirational threads where people are motivated by their waifus, while I on the contrary am motivated even less, and just play games all day that could be precious time to devote to her, which I still end up not doing.
>> No. 11212 [Edit]
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What would you do to "devote" time to her? Remember that she would want you to be happy, as you want her to be happy. I think that's a safe assumption to make.

Not everybody feels they need to "improve" themselves for the one they love. We, for example, believe that we are already perfect for each other. We love each other for who we are, not who we could be.

As an idea to what I do, I usually just play video games/watch anime all day. So, I ask her, what would you prefer to watch out of what I have here? Then I make sure to spend a certain amount of time doing that with her. Buying and maintaining 15 pot-plants was also an idea that I got from her, though not directly.

If all else fails, practice lucid dreaming. It's a difficult path with a lot of ups and downs (unless you're naturally talented) but it definitely has its rewards. Most notably being able to be with her in the flesh, to feel her skin on yours and to hear her voice clearly.

You shouldn't expect LDs to be something that will happen every night, though. Unless you stumble upon a technique that clicks with you perfectly that you can pull off flawlessly every time. I'm still searching for that, because it's been four years of practice and sometimes I still get week/month long dry-spells. But, during those years, we have made many wonderful memories in the dream world.
>> No. 11213 [Edit]
I don't know, and I often feel she wouldn't love me for not knowing. I've been trying to practice lucid dreaming somehow, but I do not sleep very well everyday, because of videogame nights. She is a strategist, and we play grand strategies. There is nothing more in the world that I would love than to lucid dream, but I am quite lazy. Hopefully I'll change, and one day I too will be able to meet mine in the dream world.
>> No. 11214 [Edit]
As long as you keep thinking about her and you are dedicated to her 100%, I think that is sufficient. Buying merchandise does help, but it's unnecessary.

Don't think about the "you do, she does" thing. It's poisonous. If you fap to others, so be it, just separate the "taking care of lust" business, with the "making love" action. Hell, just worrying about it makes you considerate and I think she would be happy because you're feeling guilt whilst doing a natural thing like fapping.

In my opinion, those threads you read are just special moments in a person's life. If you read a thread like that, of course you're going to feel like something is missing. Truth is, most of the time, nothing happens. You're just reading a compilation of the most special events, ever. Don't force yourself, because it won't be worth it. When you feel like committing time, then that is when you should completely dedicate yourself to her, and trust me, whatever you do, it'll be worth it.
>> No. 11215 [Edit]
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Perhaps once you have a non-lucid dream that involves contact with her you'll find your motivation.

Or, every hour or so, pinch your nose shut and see if you can breathe through it. It's a small, effortless habit that you can pick up that will eventually get you a few lucid dreams every now and then.

Honestly, though, I can't say I understand your laziness. Not hating, just saying.
>> No. 11216 [Edit]
I have been considering purchasing say, a figurine, because I did that for the one I loved before, which makes me feel worse because this is the one I am confident I will love forever, and I still haven't a token of her. I appreciate the advice on both of these issues of mine, as they have been stabbing at me for a while.
>> No. 11217 [Edit]
Haha, I understand, it does seem like a ridiculous scale of laziness. I appreciate the tip for lucid dreaming exercises. I'll do that from now on, thanks!
>> No. 11218 [Edit]

If you don't have any merchandise because of financial reasons, then there you go. That is a perfect way to show her that you care. Save up money and buy the figurine. You'll not only feel like you're doing something passively (saving money when you can buy anything else) , but you'll also end up with a physical object representing her, and then you can use that to show your love. Casing, cleaning, posing everyday(if it's poseable), and among other things, you'll feel like you're even more there for her.

If you're rich already and for some reason didn't buy a figure yet, well... why haven't you?

And don't worry about it. Like I said. Worrying shows that you care, and caring is undoubtedly one of the most important things in any relationship.
>> No. 11219 [Edit]
Well, the reason is a bit more simple (and embarrassing) than that. I am still in highschool and my parents do not trust me with a credit card yet, and since I am not qualified for a job yet (unless it's a horrible one like at subway) I have no consistent income. I have the money to buy one, but it'd, well, have to go through them. And maybe I am not as caring as one would think if since the figurine I DID buy that represented my past waifu, also came with a story to justify it, which I'd have to do again.
>> No. 11220 [Edit]

Oh I see. That's tough. Sorry, I assumed everyone had access to a card. You buying a figure of your past waifu only symbolizes how much you care for your partner. Even if she wasn't the one, I think it still counts. I don't really know what you could do other than wait or buy a figurine at a physical store/con-- sorry.

I think you should always wish her a good night, and say good morning to her though, if you haven't been doing that already. That's a really good way to start, along with talking to her when you make big decisions in your day. Afterwards, it should come naturally to the point where you're talking to her about small things like what to eat, homework, what happened that day, etc etc.
>> No. 11221 [Edit]
Ah, I do talk to her often when preoccupied with actual work. I don't tell her goodnight immediately though, as when I do, I end up talking to her more anyway! The only problem I find with talking to her, though (when I DO) is that I often feel that I can usually predict what she'll say back, if anything. I also wonder if she can see me, and such things that I do.
>> No. 11222 [Edit]

That's great. If you can predict what she'll say (how it should be), then you know alot about her. You should be fine. Saying good night is one thing, but remembering to say good morning is going to be difficult if you haven't gotten used to it already. Waking up and having your first thought be about your waifu is one of the best feelings in the world-- it's like you're already dedicating the entire day to her.
>> No. 11223 [Edit]
Thank you for that advice. I agree, it is very difficult for me to think of that, especially when I have to throw myself into the shower as soon as I wake up. But soon, hopefully.
>> No. 11225 [Edit]
> Truth is, most of the time, nothing happens. You're just reading a compilation of the most special events, ever.
This is a great observation that never really comes up. I can imagine a lot of newcomers here feeling intimidated because they haven't had any dramatic, life-changing moments with their waifus yet. Yet I'm sure all of our day-to-day relationships with our waifus are probably surprisingly boring.

I'd also like to point out, OP, that much of the populace here are neet, hikki, or some permutation thereof, and hence have the shit-tons of free time that facilitate their waifu interactions. Seeing that you're a full-time student, and assuming you're an introvert like most of us, you probably do nothing in your free time as you'd mentioned before because you need that time to recharge, and not necessarily just out of laziness. So my advice would be to be patient with yourself. You said you're confident you'll love her forever, so no need to get in a hurry and bring negative energies into the relationship.
>> No. 11226 [Edit]
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I personally am of the opinion that the things you do for/with your waifu aren't meant to show your love for her, but because you personally love to do those things for/with her. So do with her things that you would enjoy doing with her and that she may like too.
Me, too, use to talk with my waifu about my daily life problems and studies, those are the moments she inspired me most those daily life experiences are usually what motivates me more often than those "one time experiences" because she is helping the daily myself. I also had problems with predictability of what would she say to some situations, so what I did is try to think about situations in which she never got involved and how would respond her to those situations based on her personality. That actually helped me to work to try to understand her better than I already did, and that allowed to help her give more variated advice since I knew more of her mindset. Then again everything that isn't specifically canon is a speculation of mine, making her able to change her point of view as I "understand" her more and more. It's quite exciting and intelectually interesting see those changes while sticking to her original personality.
>> No. 11227 [Edit]
Ah, I understand now. I am put under a lot of pressure by my parents to do exceedingly well, which has also made me thought that perhaps that influenced me to change just admiring her character to eventually loving her. Now I honestly just cannot wait to leave, even if it means being on the streets, because I could finally be able to just drop all responsibilities because I am with my waifu.
>> No. 11228 [Edit]
I think I do that to a degree, but it's also that I feel like I'm suddenly preoccupied with doing that, and am so immersed into it that that is one of the times that I seem to not talk to her and also in a sense don't think about her in that instance.
>> No. 11230 [Edit]
I've never understood the stigma about fapping to your waifu. I fap to my husbando on a regular basis and most of the time I'm using my imagination. I feel like it bonds us because the idea of HIM is bringing me to climax.
>> No. 11231 [Edit]
many feel that it takes away from the purity of their loved one.
>> No. 11232 [Edit]
For me, I feel as if sexual relations (if you can even call it that) mean nothing when it comes to our love, and thus I'd just be using her to pleasure myself. I would only accept that, under any circumstance, only she would derive pleasure from it while I'd get none.
>> No. 11234 [Edit]
So you'd be fine with her using you to pleasure herself with you getting nothing from it, but you wouldn't be fine with the inverse?
>> No. 11235 [Edit]
Yes, I'd still feel bad.
>> No. 11236 [Edit]
There's more to love than sex. Sex isn't even that intimate.
>> No. 11238 [Edit]

Umm, I know? Please don't twist my words around. He means more to me than you know.
>> No. 11239 [Edit]
>Sex isn't even that intimate.
It really depend on a case-to-case kind of thing.
When you're lying on your back, and she's leaning over you, and you feel her breath on your neck, do you never get that feeling of wanting to get even closer? Like a magnetic force pulling the two of you even closer?
There's an obvious different between sex without love and passion and sex with love and passion.

Post edited on 17th Dec 2012, 2:16pm
>> No. 11242 [Edit]
And there is an obvious difference between actual sex of any sort and masturbation of any sort (unless, like Woody Allen said: Masturbation is making love to the person you love the most). I hope for 2D love to be beyond sexual matters and conflicts.

Post edited on 17th Dec 2012, 5:15pm
>> No. 11260 [Edit]
This. I really don't like the elitists in the waifu group that say or act like they're better "2D lovers" because they don't fap to their waifus. Sex to me was supposed to be an act of utmost intimacy- 3Ds don't adhere to this one bit, but this board has nothing to do with 3Ds or relationships with 3Ds.

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